hello, new here...

S

SMiRC

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Mar 31, 2011
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feeling very lonely and desperate :( been medicated for bipolar in the past (without proper diagnosis) but now they think it might be bpd. all the same for me cause the reality is that i am totally unable to lead a normal life. had a total crash after a few weeks' hypomania (or whatever) phase, was unable to even talk to people for a couple of days, just kept staring at walls and was extremely lethargic, then started drinking and felt better (I KNOW i shouldn't do that...) for a while, crash down yesterday i cut my wrists quite bad and so on and so on.
I feel helpless and i am losing all my friends cause no one can understand or cope with my mood swings and self-harming behaviour.

Sorry, stupid ranting. i have a pdoc appointment in two weeks and i am both scared and hopeful.

(I live in Finland and my english is a bit rusty, sorry for that)
 
maxitab

maxitab

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Hi, and :welcome: to the forum. Your English is very good, it puts us to shame. The only thing I know about Finnish is that it amazes me by being a language which has something like 23 clauses.....

And as to a stupid rant, no, you are expressing yourself and that is never stupid. Getting the bipolar/BPD thing sorted out can be a nightmare. I'm 58 and my initial dx was BP, then they said it was BPD, now it is both (and a few other things too!)

Anyway, you can chat to us, rant all you like, chat away in a journal, join in when you feel ready, play a silly game and visit the cyber cafe. Whatever you do here, I know you will find people who are friendly and supportive, as I have......
 
S

SMiRC

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thank you, i've been reading this forum for a long time (i don't like our finnish forums, mainly arguing and not so supportive) but i'm a bit afraid of posting (just plain boring social phobia) but in my current state of mind i just had to, i think i'm very close to understanding the feeling of "losing one's mind" right now.

yeah finnish is a bit complex, in some past life when i was able to function i was a lecturer of finnish languge in Russia, wow what a nightmare trying to explain our cases to uninterested 18-y old university students :)
 
bobshocker

bobshocker

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warmest welcome buddy
 
maxitab

maxitab

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I taught French for a while - it was bad enough trying to explain why everything had to be either male or female!
 
Pixie37

Pixie37

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Hiya,

:welcome: to the forum. If you have any questions just pm me or another forum buddy.

Pixie :)
 
Fluffymum

Fluffymum

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Hi hun this is a great forum, let it all out hun evry1 is great with the support here x
 
S

SMiRC

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Thank you all, i'm gonna see a private psychiatrist soon, i don't get any help from communal health services, not even after a suicide attempt, guess they are really low on resources here or then they just dismiss me cause of my IQ score, yes i was told bluntly "you are too smart to be admitted, here's a recipe for diazepam, go home and get a hold of yourself". :((( this is pure hell.
 
S

SMiRC

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I taught French for a while - it was bad enough trying to explain why everything had to be either male or female!
:D, ça c'est drôle, moi je parle français aussi mais par très bien en ce moment, après 4 ans en Russie j'ai tout oublié :) bien sûr je comprends mais j'ai honte de parler/écrire parce que c'est presque infantile ce que je peux dire et je fais beaucoup d'erreurs.
 

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