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Hello neurodiverse folks. It's me!

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Bubbles17

Member
Joined
Oct 24, 2021
Messages
17
Location
Netherlands
Hello everyone! It's me :p

I'm a 20 year old girl from the Netherlands who is feeling a little lonely in her disabilities right now. I am having a bit of a down day, and I realized that in some areas I have no one to talk to who could relate to me. So I decided to look around on the internet and found this forum. And as I saw what kinds of stuff is all out here I was instantly happy. Finally! People who understand me!

Soo, what exactly do I have you may ask? It's quite the list. I'm one of those "get one and have 7 extra for free" people like probably most people here. But I am also still very much in the middle of figuring out what exactly I have. At this very moment these are the confirmed diagnosed things I have:
- ADHD
- C-PTSD
- Reactive attachment disorder
- (smiling) depression
- touretted

There's some that are still on the list of being pretty sure I have it but not having a diagnosis yet:
- ASD
- Migraines
- A very rare genetic mutation I got from my mother.

And then there's the things I still have questions about whether I might have it or not: Depersonalization/Derealization disorder. But it could also be something else. And also borderline personality disorder

And then with those things come small things like rejection sensitivity issues, processing issues, selective mutism, auditory processing disorder, I'm an HSP, Synestesia, misophonia, dysphraxia, sensory issues, corprolalia (cursing tic), echolalia, hypermobility and I'm pretty sure there's more that I still have to figure out. I have also had 2 burnout. I'm actually still in the middle of one of them and trying to recover.

I'll put a trigger warning here for people who are survivors and people who have struggles with suicidal things. It's mainly just mentioned, but I'm still putting it there.
I am very open so I will share some of the stuff I've been through here.
I was physically, mentally and sexually abused as a child up until the age of 3,5. After that I became a foster child. At school I got bullied. Looking back I understand why. I wasn't diagnosed with anything at the time. And around 10 years old I developed depression. But I kept it to myself. I also became suicidal at that age. So, I was a 10 year old kid thinking about suicide. Eventually I managed to get out of the suicidal state but my depression did turn into a functional/smiling depression. To this day I still have it. So, I've lived with it for 10 years now. That's half of my life. It's weird to think about. At 17 years old I suddenly got a huge mental breakdown to the point that I was absolutely non functional for 3 months. I couldn't eat or sleep and I had constant anxiety and panic attacks. This is where we discovered I have C-PTSD. So I got treated for that and with that I also got my diagnosis for ADHD and reactive attachment disorder. A year later, I landed in a burnout. So, all the functioning I had build back up was gone. I wasn't eating again. This time I was sleeping a whole crap ton amount though. But even walking to the toilet wad exhausting. So I was home again for 2 months. When I started being able to function again I met my boyfriend. 2 months later I basically moved in with him...
Yeah that's fast I know. But almost 2 years later we're still going strong. At 17 I started developing tics which got worse over time. I got diagnosed with tourettes just this week. We all knew I had it. I just needed an official diagnosis. I also am currently living in a mental burnout. But things are going the positive direction. I was jobless for half a year cause, you know, people won't take folks with disabilities. Right now I work at some type of day care for people with disabilities. It's basically "voluntary work" for people who have disabilities and can't get a job. The people running the place are specialized in this. It's supposed to be a timely thing since I do want to get back into school one day. But I first wanna focus on my mental health and get all the diagnosis stuff I need etc. I can work with animals and one of my obsessions specifically: horses. So, I'm having a blast there and the day care thing also helps keeping structure in my days. I am right now waiting on permission to get tested for autism. After that I wanna talk through whether I might have Depersonalization/derealization disorder and/or migraines. The symptoms can be similar so we have to see what exactly I have. And when I'm ready I want to go into the process of seeing if I have the rare genetic mutation. Since it's so rare it's gonna be quite the process. I don't even know the actual name for it. All I know is that my biological mom has it, at least 2 of my biolohigical siblings and I likely have it too.

So, that's kinda my story. I hope I can find some comfort and friends here. It's lonely sometimes being the only one with disabilities. I mean, I know enough people with ADHD and autism and depression and such, but the more rare stuff like tourettes is a different story. I also don't know anyone who had c-ptsd near me.

Even though I have my battles and things are pretty hard at times, I'm a proud neurodiverse person. I embrace it for what it is and just try to learn to live with it. Oh and might I mention, I'm also part of the LGBTQ+ tribe. I'm bisexual and a two-spirit girl.

Well that was me. I'm curious what this forum will bring me :D
 
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Bod

Former member
Joined
Jul 19, 2021
Messages
7,860
Location
Pretty Good
Hello Bubbles17, welcome to the forum I hope you will settle here as everyone is very helpful and caring.
 
Maitri

Maitri

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 24, 2021
Messages
1,499
Location
UK
Hi Bubbles, I'm very new around here too. I just find posting stuff therapeutic. I can't really compete with your own list of challenges 🙂 but then life is not really a competition, everyone is unique and precious beyond price.
Maybe my daughter would relate better as she works with all sorts (she also has to put up with me....:cheer:) I've done quite a bit of voluntary work alongside her and once asked "what's wrong with this one" and she said "you don't need to know what's wrong with them, you just treat them for the child that they are", a lesson she told me that she learnt herself from another lady. I suppose that is how we grow, learning from each other.
Anyway, enough for now. I'm a bit of an oldie, we have the grandchildren with us and I can hear the little mites stirring in the bedroom.
All the best to you, and keep smiling the smile.
Welcome to the forum.
 
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