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Hello, I'm glad I'm still here but i need some advice.

B

Banniskirk80

New member
Joined
Dec 9, 2019
Messages
2
Location
Perth
Hello, thanks for taking the time to read this. I've had a torrid November and December which started with my wife telling me she wanted a separation. I have depression and am on anti-depressants for it and had been managing quite well.
After telling me of her wishes to separate my wife ignored my attempts to talk to her about it, ignored our two children, stayed out of the house til the wee small hours and left me to do all the parenting and domestic duties.
I had 13 days o barely eating or sleeping, trying to hold our family together, going to work and just trying to put a brave face on things while all the time feeling like I was unravelling.
Eventually, after a huge argument in the middle o the night I just had the thought "I canna do this anymore". So I got up, drove to where I am originally fae, wrote goodbye letters and instructions, had a walk along ma favourite beach and then watched the sun set while taking my anti-depressants and a bottle o whisky. Luckily I was so tired that I fell asleep after the first packet or I woulda taken the other packet. Hours later I woke up and in a moment o clarity thought "I dinna want to do this". So I called ma best pal who came and got to me afore the ambulance did.
I'm okay thankfully. No lasting damage done and after 2 nights in hospital and a thorough assessment by a local CPN I was discharged and spent two weeks at my parents getting masel back on ma feet.
But now ma wife is saying that i cannot return to my home or see ma kids. She says that she has spoken to people and legally i have no rights to return to my marital home as i am a danger to ma children. She alleges that she has been told this by the police but has no physical proof of this. No-one has contacted me by phone, letter or email about this.
Has anyone had a similar experience? Is ma wife making this up? I haven't seen ma children in weeks and not seeing them is really cutting me up inside!
 
Fairy Lucretia

Fairy Lucretia

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Apr 9, 2011
Messages
34,736
Location
Magical fairy wonderland xxxx
hi ,it sounds to me like you were desperate and that doesn't mean you are a danger to your children ,we all do things we regret x can I ask ,how old are they?
welcome love Lu xxx

first thing I would suggest is get advise on your parental rights from a solicitor xxx
 
B

Banniskirk80

New member
Joined
Dec 9, 2019
Messages
2
Location
Perth
Hi Lu. Thanks for the kind words. The bairns are 8 and 5. They are really missing me and are asking me when I am coming home all the time 😥😥
 
C

Cottam91

Member
Joined
Dec 9, 2019
Messages
12
Location
Preston
Hi

Safe guarding children is a matter for the courts to decide. The Police can step in prior to any hearings and such if it is deemed necessary, however given you're time in hospital it may be wise to see if you can get the doctor that treated you to produce a letter confirming whether you are or are not a danger to the kids.

As long as there is no history there, then one desperate act that you admit was a mistake should not dictate your parenting abilities.

I'd suggest going via citizens advice (I'm assuming you're scottish) they do have the free service up there, someone should be able to assist you if you get an appointment booked in.

All the best.
 
B

beautifulsky

New member
Joined
Dec 13, 2019
Messages
3
Location
midwest
Hello, thanks for taking the time to read this. I've had a torrid November and December which started with my wife telling me she wanted a separation. I have depression and am on anti-depressants for it and had been managing quite well.
After telling me of her wishes to separate my wife ignored my attempts to talk to her about it, ignored our two children, stayed out of the house til the wee small hours and left me to do all the parenting and domestic duties.
I had 13 days o barely eating or sleeping, trying to hold our family together, going to work and just trying to put a brave face on things while all the time feeling like I was unravelling.
Eventually, after a huge argument in the middle o the night I just had the thought "I canna do this anymore". So I got up, drove to where I am originally fae, wrote goodbye letters and instructions, had a walk along ma favourite beach and then watched the sun set while taking my anti-depressants and a bottle o whisky. Luckily I was so tired that I fell asleep after the first packet or I woulda taken the other packet. Hours later I woke up and in a moment o clarity thought "I dinna want to do this". So I called ma best pal who came and got to me afore the ambulance did.
I'm okay thankfully. No lasting damage done and after 2 nights in hospital and a thorough assessment by a local CPN I was discharged and spent two weeks at my parents getting masel back on ma feet.
But now ma wife is saying that i cannot return to my home or see ma kids. She says that she has spoken to people and legally i have no rights to return to my marital home as i am a danger to ma children. She alleges that she has been told this by the police but has no physical proof of this. No-one has contacted me by phone, letter or email about this.
Has anyone had a similar experience? Is ma wife making this up? I haven't seen ma children in weeks and not seeing them is really cutting me up inside!
Did your wife behave this way while you were together and do you have proof? This is abusive. There is no reason to beat yourself up about suicide attempt. We have a breaking point. Men are socialized to hold on way too long. Praying for you
 
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