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Hearing Voices or just my Conscience?

lonelymoonchild

lonelymoonchild

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I am unable to recognize if what I hear are voices or just my inner conscience. First I don't hear them out loud I hear them in my head. Next, they say both positive and negative things, a few examples "You're going to do great" "You're beautiful" "I hate you" "Kill yourself" "Kill your mom and dad" "Everyone hates you", and many more depending on what's going on. Also, they don't really have a distinct voice, what I mean is I can't really tell if the voice sounds male, female, or anything like that. Another thing is, it seems like sometimes I can control what they say, but other times I can not. Also, it seems like I can talk to them and they can answer back sometimes. Also, some mental health workers have told me that it could just be my conscience, while others have said it is voices. Last, some of the things they say to do I would never do or even think about doing. So if you have any ideas on which one it could be, or even if it's something else please reply, I am so confused and stressed about them. Thank you in advance!
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

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First I don't hear them out loud I hear them in my head.
This is how I hear my voice, I could carry on full conversations with him if I wanted to but I'm ignoring him for his bad behaviour. He sounds a little like me (less and less as time has gone on) but he's distinctively separate in my mind, totally uncontrollable thoughts.

I have my own ideas on who and what he is that are a fair bit (or possibly quite far) outside 'the box' so to speak.

I'm sorry yours can be so negative at times, if it gets overwhelming and too loud so you can't concentrate seek out a doctor and they may prescribe you some medication for it.

For me the medication works like turning a radio's volume down from 10 to 1 so I can focus and concentrate more easily now.
 
lonelymoonchild

lonelymoonchild

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This is how I hear my voice, I could carry on full conversations with him if I wanted to but I'm ignoring him for his bad behaviour. He sounds a little like me (less and less as time has gone on) but he's distinctively separate in my mind, totally uncontrollable thoughts.

I have my own ideas on who and what he is that are a fair bit (or possibly quite far) outside 'the box' so to speak.

I'm sorry yours can be so negative at times, if it gets overwhelming and too loud so you can't concentrate seek out a doctor and they may prescribe you some medication for it.

For me the medication works like turning a radio's volume down from 10 to 1 so I can focus and concentrate more easily now.
Thank you so much for your reply, it means a lot knowing I'm not the only one going through things like this! :)
 
NWiddi

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You're certainly not the only one, there have been so many voice hearers just on these forums over the years you wouldn't believe how many.

A video I saw once claimed that 10% of all people have had some kind of voice hearing experience, voices while falling asleep, voices while just waking up, voices all the time (me) and those that just hear the odd word now and then like hearing someone calling out their name like a family member of mine did, she checked the whole house when she was a child and nobody had called her name.

I later told her (after I became a voice hearer) it was her voice and that I believe everyone has one hidden away inside them watching and listening to everything they do and say. Some talk to us directly but most don't.
 
mami5

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Sorry for jumping in....but how do you know whether what you are hearing is a voice and not your own thoughts? I have many conversations going on in my head and professionals keep asking me what they are, voices or thoughts? So far they've put them down to thoughts but I don't know?
 
jb5784

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I know the voices are not my conscience when they tell me to stop taking medication or leave my house at 3 o’clock in the morning to go for a walk. Sometimes the voices are in my head or it sounds like someone is talking to me from the sky.
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

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Are you on anti-psychotics @mami5?

I always thought that my thoughts were all my own until I started taking anti-psychotics, then I realised that certain thoughts I've had all my life have come from my voice pretending to be me.

Now I make sure my mind is empty all the time so all the words in my head belong to my voice and it's easy to tell the difference between what is him and what is me.

Not sure how much sense that makes.
 
mami5

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Yes, I am on low dose of risperidone 0.5mg. They tell me it should help my anxiety so I can sleep better. My head can tell me to die and that I don't deserve to live etc. Can be quite frightening, especially when I'm depressed. It is almost non stop then. I just wish I knew what it was.
 
NWiddi

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Do these words in your head sound any different to your own thoughts now you're on Risperidone? I'm on 4mg of Risperidone and 10mg of Aripiprazole.

I can't tell you what to believe but my idea is all humans share their bodies with another consciousness, two minds per body, a bit like my avatar. I believe anti-psychotics make this other consciousness depressed so they often tell us to hurt ourselves and that we don't deserve to live.

But you know what's in your heart, you don't want to hurt yourself so you ignore the words in your head.

It was frightening for me at first but then I learned to ignore my voice, he once pretended to be God and demanded that I take my own life but I refused and said if he's God then he should do it, I'm still here years later so I guess he can't.
 
mami5

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Thank you for your reply, don't think I'm on enough risperidone to make much difference. There are times, especially when not well, when I think it is the devil talking to me, he's inside me and I must obey him. But I can't recognise a voice, nor say it is male or female, the only thing I can say is that it is in English when I normally think in Welsh. I wish I knew for certain what it was. Who could help me find out? Psych and others just ask mew whether it is voices or thoughts and I don't know!
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

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In my experience intrusive or unwanted thoughts are my voice speaking to me.

Whatever they are I believe the treatments are the same, but sometimes if you talk to those thoughts they may talk back. And sometimes if you talk to those thoughts as if you were talking to someone you love they can change from negative to positive.

I've had long conversations with mine and without realising he was doing it he taught me a lot about him which is why I believe the things I do.
 
mami5

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I am not treated for it at all, I got the risperidone to help me sleep and was told it helps with anxiety too. They don't treat my voice/thoughts at all, only ask me what they are and as I don't really know I tell it is my head telling me things. I wish I understood it better.
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

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Is the Risperidone doing that for you? Helping with anxiety and sleep?

It does for me but also makes my voice quieter and it speaks slower as well.
 
mami5

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I don't know whether it helps or not. I still have difficulty sleeping at times and have bad anxiety too, even caused paranoia couple of months ago. Think it is such a low dose it doesn't really do much of anything!
 
NWiddi

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Risperidone doesn't do much for my sleep either, I think the Aripiprazole that I take in the morning makes me more tired than the Risperidone taken at night.

But anti-psychotics feel like they're doing more for my anxiety symptoms than the Sertraline does.

I think I blame my voice now for most of the physical 'symptoms' I had that I usually associated with my social anxiety, going red in the face and sweating profusely whenever I was dealing with people face to face. I believe these things are totally within the realm of physical things our voices can do to us.

And my voice still tries with the paranoid thoughts but I know they come from him so I can easily ignore them. It seems to be a skill I've developed thanks to anti-psychotics, I know exactly what thoughts are his now and what are my own.

How does your anxiety manifest and what sort of paranoid thoughts did you have?
 
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