Having an awful day

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Sarabi_Gyarados

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Had a bad argument with my dad and husband, reached out for comfort to others and couldn't find it.

I feel the world is cold and cruel and I feel so alone.

I am not going to act on it, but just feel like I want to die so the pain and hurt will end. I'm 30 and my life is just spiralling.
 
Fairy Lucretia

Fairy Lucretia

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awww im sorry you had an argument it is easy to feel unwell after something like that
we care on here though
I care I hope you feel better very soon
love Lu xxx
 
Lynds1990

Lynds1990

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I'm 28, and I feel as if the older I get, the more my life falls apart. I completely understand.

It's always nice to know you can post here and get a bit of kindness when you need it. I hope you feel better. x
 
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dewey

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Sarabi the world feels cruel and cold but you are a lovely soul.

I hope that you will start to feel better soon.

We are here for you xx
 
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Sarabi_Gyarados

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thank you dewey, sometimes I feel I am so sensitive that I'm not supposed to be in this world. On stronger days I think I am supposed to be here to help in some way. Thank you for your words.
 
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Zoe1

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I feel sensitive like that as well Sarabi
like full of raw emotion isn't it
making it into a creative outlet gives it some sort of purpose

:hug5: 💜
 
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dewey

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Sarabi, I have seen a lot of your posts on this forum and I really like you.

Being a giving person is wonderful, BUT I sense you being someone who over-gives, and completely neglects themself at the same time. This is also a form of "self-harm" in my opinion. And it should not be encouraged. Why give to others but not yourself???

As adults we need to look after ourselves. It is highly likely that your needs may not have been met as a child and as a result you didn't learn to look after yourself properly. It is highly likely that you learnt that your role is to look after others. Perhaps you were anxious of doing something wrong to hurt others so you kind of feel it is your place to be "the giver". It really helped me to be aware that balanced, good people give to others when they can, but that they also give to themselves. It helped me to realise that actually, over-giving and neglecting myself is not right.

You can spend hours wondering why the world is in so much pain and why you are so powerless to do anything - and you want to do something about it - and this is a sign of a good person.

But you must also know your limitations. Your self limitations are where you can afford to give... and where you can't. You need to set some clear boundaries in terms of when you can afford to be giving, and when you can't. Right now your priority should be YOU.

I am sorry that those around you in your life haven't been around to support you recently. I know that that is a terrible feeling, I also have had it recently, and it makes you feel alone and worth nothing. It makes you feel used. But you know what, we have to learn to become self-reliant.

I truly hope that at least some of my words ring true for you. I want you to know that you are not the only person who has gone through these struggles. It may be true that you are sensitive but you need to stop viewing that as a negative thing that you are 'too sensitive for this world'. Sensitive people have their place in the world, but especially when they learn also how to respect themselves.

I hope to empower you through this. 💗
 
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Zoe1

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someone who over-gives, and completely neglects themself at the same time. This is also a form of "self-harm" in my opinion
yes and I have self diagnosed myself
as having a ' co-dependent personality disorder '
you can have a dependent one but not a co-dependent one
some of us have difficulty knowing what we want in life
I have had times when I'm only feeling other peoples feelings not my own

:grouphug:
 
megirl

megirl

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I think the most sensitive and caring people in the world get hurt time and time again
The alternative is being unkind and not caring for others. Putting ourselves first without caring how this may affect others.
I would hate to be a bitter uncaring and cold person. If I behaved like that then what pleasure would I get out of life? Probably not a lot if any.I get Pleasure out of helping others, even if it was a smile or a compliment of any sort. Seeing someone having a better day because of me saying or doing something is worth a million
 
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Sarabi_Gyarados

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Thank you for asking fairy. I am a little better today. I am trying to hold onto more of my self love instead of keep giving it away. This feels a little weird and even selfish, but the energy of making everyone else okay (without feeling it back) was beginning to eat at me.
 
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Sarabi_Gyarados

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Sarabi, I have seen a lot of your posts on this forum and I really like you.

Being a giving person is wonderful, BUT I sense you being someone who over-gives, and completely neglects themself at the same time. This is also a form of "self-harm" in my opinion. And it should not be encouraged. Why give to others but not yourself???

As adults we need to look after ourselves. It is highly likely that your needs may not have been met as a child and as a result you didn't learn to look after yourself properly. It is highly likely that you learnt that your role is to look after others. Perhaps you were anxious of doing something wrong to hurt others so you kind of feel it is your place to be "the giver". It really helped me to be aware that balanced, good people give to others when they can, but that they also give to themselves. It helped me to realise that actually, over-giving and neglecting myself is not right.

You can spend hours wondering why the world is in so much pain and why you are so powerless to do anything - and you want to do something about it - and this is a sign of a good person.

But you must also know your limitations. Your self limitations are where you can afford to give... and where you can't. You need to set some clear boundaries in terms of when you can afford to be giving, and when you can't. Right now your priority should be YOU.

I am sorry that those around you in your life haven't been around to support you recently. I know that that is a terrible feeling, I also have had it recently, and it makes you feel alone and worth nothing. It makes you feel used. But you know what, we have to learn to become self-reliant.

I truly hope that at least some of my words ring true for you. I want you to know that you are not the only person who has gone through these struggles. It may be true that you are sensitive but you need to stop viewing that as a negative thing that you are 'too sensitive for this world'. Sensitive people have their place in the world, but especially when they learn also how to respect themselves.

I hope to empower you through this. 💗
yes yes yes dewey, you understand so much of me.

I do over-give of myself and always wish someone could over-give to me too. I am trying to give more to myself but it still feels hollow, like I want the giving to come from outside of me.
 
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