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Having a tough today

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Sarabi_Gyarados

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 20, 2019
Messages
198
Location
UK
I am in a LDR and have not heard from my boyfriend today so far. I do trust him but am also realistic about human nature and so my trust in people can be elastic. I have also not always been so trustworthy myself so for me there's a lot of projection.

Then I went to the park and saw lots of attractive people (on closer inspection, many were not that attractive, I just project again that I am less attractive and they are more.)

Suddenly now I feel insecure, worthless, pointless, insignificant - this big void inside of me. I am just one of many people, how can I be special to anyone? How can any of us?

Can someone please remind me I have worth.

I haven't shared this with anyone else, so I haven't hurt my relationships, but this feels like a safe space to be whilst it fades.
 
Soul_Deeps

Soul_Deeps

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 31, 2017
Messages
189
Location
Germany
Yes, there are many people on this world, but you are not "one of many", everyone is an individual and thus special, and so are you.
 
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Sarabi_Gyarados

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 20, 2019
Messages
198
Location
UK
But if everyone is special how is anyone special?
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
3,154
Location
Nowhere
But if everyone is special how is anyone special?
because like midnight said
everybody is unique
like a huge garden of different flowers and animals
like cats are all unique once you get to know them
they have quirky personalities

you are special to us, we can appreciate your personality

and as for looks that is about confidence
not perfection !

:hug5: 🌹
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
850
Location
Norfolk
I am in a LDR and have not heard from my boyfriend today so far. I do trust him but am also realistic about human nature and so my trust in people can be elastic. I have also not always been so trustworthy myself so for me there's a lot of projection.

Then I went to the park and saw lots of attractive people (on closer inspection, many were not that attractive, I just project again that I am less attractive and they are more.)

Suddenly now I feel insecure, worthless, pointless, insignificant - this big void inside of me. I am just one of many people, how can I be special to anyone? How can any of us?

Can someone please remind me I have worth.

I haven't shared this with anyone else, so I haven't hurt my relationships, but this feels like a safe space to be whilst it fades.
Looks really are irrelevant in a relationship. A person will think somebody is special due to their personality, a connection is made.
Just remember it’s your BPD activating core beliefs that are making you feel this way. It’s just a thought. It doesn’t mean it’s true. It will pass in time so just wait and you’ll feel better. The real you wants to say:

I am loveable
I am worthy
I do matter
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
850
Location
Norfolk
I say things like that to myself in the morning
it was a really hard habit to adopt !
Well done you! The more you like and accept yourself for who you are, the more calmness and peace you will find in your life. It’s the key to recovery imo.
 
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