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have you gotten so bad you no longer care?

lilbat

lilbat

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Joined
Dec 14, 2020
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5
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Lithuania
At this point my depression is as severe as it gets probably. As the title says, I no longer care about anything. I have no hobbies, no interests, no dreams, no goal, no purpose, no job, no college degree, nothing really. I no longer even care to heal, you know? Like I don't care to get up, go to therapy and heal. I don't care nor want to read, learn, educate myself, watch something, listen to something, do something. Funniest thing is that I can't even be BOTHERED to kill myself. The process of getting up and then doing it is bothersome. I don't give a fuck. Don't get me wrong I tried to force myself. I forced myself to do certain things, but stopped not even finishing. No joy, no pleasure, no excitement, no interest. I'd see other people on the internet with depression and other mental illnesses and they do things, you know? They have dreams, they work, study, they want to learn, to see, to know, they care about things. And then you start feeling alone, thinking "damn, am I really the only one who completely gave up on everything and has no ounce of motivation, energy or care?"
 
A

Am33

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Depression is like a spiral of water than it becomes a vortex that sucks the life at of you . Like a bathtub and the stopper has been pulled out and all the lovely warm water is draining out .You can let it continue and sit there in the cold shivering or you can make a decision just one decision to put the stopper back in . After than you make just one more decision to add some warm water back in the tub . We can do that with positive affirmation( spoken word ) can find on the net its helped millions of people proven by science. I do then everyday for 1 hr mornings , evenings . Then we have to look at the belief , trauma that caused the depression and work on that . You aren't alone many people to help you here . We are all in this together :)
 
J

JoPTay

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Dec 21, 2020
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england
Honestly, I wish I had some solid advice to help you or to make you feel better, but I'm afraid I don't. All I do know is that you're not alone. I feel the same. I don't even recognise myself anymore because I used to care so much about getting better, and still achieving all my goals but now, I can't even bothered to maintain basic hygiene let alone anything else.
I hope the small fact that you're not alone somewhat helps and hope that you start to feel better and see a light at the end of the tunnel soon.
 
N

Nukelavee

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Dec 17, 2019
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London, ON
I can't even bothered to maintain basic hygiene let alone anything else.
Do a minimum amount of self care a day. Brush you teeth and hair, wash up, shower every few days, and put on clean clothes.

It sounds trivial, but doing that will make you feel a bit better.

further - do one household chore a day. Dishes, clean and tidy a corner, organize the stuff on your table. Make your home a tiny bit nicer to be in. And enjoy that victory.

I've been in the state you two are in right now, and have felt exactly like you. It took a lot of work from my Mom to get me to do those things, but, wow, Mom was right.

It's like exercising -you won't be lifting 500 pounds the day you start. But, a little work every day will increase your capacity to lift. It's teh same with doing stuff.

It also helped me to try to remember all the things I used to like, and then figure out why I didn't like them, was there a real reason? Like, I was so down, I forgot I liked pickles. Didn't have any for years, until I was like "Hey, I like pickles, maybe I should buy and try some, in case I still do".
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Messages
8,613
Location
Nashua NH
Do a minimum amount of self care a day. Brush you teeth and hair, wash up, shower every few days, and put on clean clothes.

It sounds trivial, but doing that will make you feel a bit better.

further - do one household chore a day. Dishes, clean and tidy a corner, organize the stuff on your table. Make your home a tiny bit nicer to be in. And enjoy that victory.

I've been in the state you two are in right now, and have felt exactly like you. It took a lot of work from my Mom to get me to do those things, but, wow, Mom was right.

It's like exercising -you won't be lifting 500 pounds the day you start. But, a little work every day will increase your capacity to lift. It's teh same with doing stuff.

It also helped me to try to remember all the things I used to like, and then figure out why I didn't like them, was there a real reason? Like, I was so down, I forgot I liked pickles. Didn't have any for years, until I was like "Hey, I like pickles, maybe I should buy and try some, in case I still do".
So did you end up liking the pickles?
 
N

Nukelavee

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London, ON
So did you end up liking the pickles?
I did. And now have several types in my fridge.

Depression isn't just not being happy, it's not being able to feel or recognize it even if it's knocking at the door. We forget what it likes to feel good, and therefore give up trying. It becomes like trying to get a blind man to understand "blue".

My experience is we have to re-teach ourselves what enjoyment can be. Get a little momentum going in your day.

I'm not saying it's foolproof. I still have bad days and weeks. But I don't let myself not do things just because I currently feel down.
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Messages
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Nashua NH
I did. And now have several types in my fridge.

Depression isn't just not being happy, it's not being able to feel or recognize it even if it's knocking at the door. We forget what it likes to feel good, and therefore give up trying. It becomes like trying to get a blind man to understand "blue".

My experience is we have to re-teach ourselves what enjoyment can be. Get a little momentum going in your day.

I'm not saying it's foolproof. I still have bad days and weeks. But I don't let myself not do things just because I currently feel down.
I go wild for olives and pickled beets.
 
F

Fairy Fountain

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I can relate. I don't feel this way right now, but I used to. I remember not even caring about taking care of myself and my life. Now I have to get my life together and I feel bad about it. Most people my age are doing something with their lives. But for me, it was like time stood still and I became trapped. What's been helping me was finding the right medications and going to therapy. Also slowly making changes in my life. Doing small things to take care of myself so I can make my day go by a little easier. But I still have a lot to work on. Hope you feel better soon.
 
OmniscientNihilist

OmniscientNihilist

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reminds me of the giant turtle on never ending story movie that says "we dont even care whether or not we care"
 
N

Nukelavee

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Joined
Dec 17, 2019
Messages
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Location
London, ON
What's been helping me was finding the right medications and going to therapy. Also slowly making changes in my life. Doing small things to take care of myself so I can make my day go by a little easier.
These are all huge, and great, steps - that's amazing.

sometimes, it's about making ourselves less unhappy, rather than happy.
 
Carl Melo

Carl Melo

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Joined
Dec 22, 2020
Messages
15
Location
Brazil
I can totally relate with you, I don't feel like trying to do anything because nothing matters anymore. There's no point at anything, there's no reason, there's no meaning in doing stuff. Yes, sometimes I try, sometimes I start something new but I fail. Like tomorrow I'll do exercises, learn something and meditate, alright, but I keep it for one or two days and I fail because there's no point for me in doing stuff.
 
M

matt42069

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 18, 2020
Messages
66
Location
Lithuania
At this point my depression is as severe as it gets probably. As the title says, I no longer care about anything. I have no hobbies, no interests, no dreams, no goal, no purpose, no job, no college degree, nothing really. I no longer even care to heal, you know? Like I don't care to get up, go to therapy and heal. I don't care nor want to read, learn, educate myself, watch something, listen to something, do something. Funniest thing is that I can't even be BOTHERED to kill myself. The process of getting up and then doing it is bothersome. I don't give a fuck. Don't get me wrong I tried to force myself. I forced myself to do certain things, but stopped not even finishing. No joy, no pleasure, no excitement, no interest. I'd see other people on the internet with depression and other mental illnesses and they do things, you know? They have dreams, they work, study, they want to learn, to see, to know, they care about things. And then you start feeling alone, thinking "damn, am I really the only one who completely gave up on everything and has no ounce of motivation, energy or care?"
Im in basically same spot . anything i do nowadays is just the things that i remember once brought me happiness and now nothing does . i dont even care for myself eating all kinds of junk food hoping that i would just magically ceize to exist .
 
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