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    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

have you ever had suicidal thoughts? attempts?

thing fish

thing fish

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 1, 2009
Messages
150
Location
ohio
i would imagine most of us have...
there was a point right after my wife left me where i was very suicidal. i sliced my left wrist pretty good but obviously it didn't work.
i have not felt suicidal in a long time.....

am i the only one?
 
P

pole2pole

New member
Joined
Oct 20, 2009
Messages
2
Yes. I have often feel suicidal when in the depths of depression. It seems like the only way to end my anguish and suffering. Also when really depressed and suicidal I believe that it is best for my familiy, friends and people around me if I were not here. The guilt is terrible when out of this state, I can't believe that those feelings or suicidal thoughts crossed my mind.:redface:
 
HeartOfDarkness

HeartOfDarkness

Active member
Joined
Oct 19, 2009
Messages
35
Location
scotland
The guilt is terrible when out of this state, I can't believe that those feelings or suicidal thoughts crossed my mind.:redface:
Ive felt as well when ive went through serious low periods that id rather be dead than feel like that, and when i feel better i wonder why i felt like that when ive got so much to live for. Im trying to change my way of thinking when im low and try to think like a fighter who will win. I think the thought of suicide crosses a lot of peoples minds but not everyone admits to it.
 
Micky

Micky

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Joined
Oct 10, 2009
Messages
68
Suicide

I think of suicide ALL the time... there are moment when its not as intense but my life pretty much goes with the whole suicide thought crap and I hate it I just wish I was dead and there was a easy way out....:cry:
 
jax

jax

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Joined
Nov 23, 2008
Messages
868
Location
Belfast, N.Ireland
I thought of suicide a lot in my early years of my illness. (Been sick 21 years). I took od's - but not really meaning to kill myself. I had 3 1/2 year of no thoughts of suicide and then this past summer - that all changed. I started to feel suicidal again. I really struggled with the thoughts. It is not nice to have these thoughts.
 
thing fish

thing fish

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 1, 2009
Messages
150
Location
ohio
strange thing with me is i am afraid to die....very afraid...i don't believe in god and heaven and all that...

afraid to die yet sometimes i want to. i just want the pain to go away....
 
M

mad as a hatter

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Joined
Jul 23, 2008
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2,167
Location
scotland
My suicide thoughts seem 2 be there every min off every wakened mn off everyday there so intense i to had yrs when the weren,t so bad i last acted on them 6 months ago but it,s such a struggle 2 keep that going not easy 2 talk about either
 
jax

jax

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Joined
Nov 23, 2008
Messages
868
Location
Belfast, N.Ireland
Thing fish - I too am afraid to die. I don't believe in God either - well I sorta do. I believe that there is life after this - but what direction I am going is frightening to not know. Sometimes I just want to escape - I will take extra seroquel then to sleep for 2-3 days and then when I wake up - I am usually better able to deal with what ever is going on.
Jacqui
 
thing fish

thing fish

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 1, 2009
Messages
150
Location
ohio
Thing fish - I too am afraid to die. I don't believe in God either - well I sorta do. I believe that there is life after this - but what direction I am going is frightening to not know. Sometimes I just want to escape - I will take extra seroquel then to sleep for 2-3 days and then when I wake up - I am usually better able to deal with what ever is going on.
Jacqui
i want to believe in god i just don't. i can't. i mean if there is a god then why did he curse me with this illness?
maybe i need to ask my doc for some seroquel
 
jax

jax

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Joined
Nov 23, 2008
Messages
868
Location
Belfast, N.Ireland
I am actually having bible lessons at home once a week. I have had two lessons so far. I too want to believe so bad. I want to feel the way my teacher does about God - but I don't. I am taking the lessons so I can know more about the bible and to see if I can finally fully believe in God.

Don't ask for seroquel - I really shouldn't have said that. It is not good to self-medicate. It is just an escape for me sometimes. I take too much as I am on the max dose atm and I take nearly that again. Not condoning self-medication x x
 
Micky

Micky

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 10, 2009
Messages
68
What I do

If I am wanting to die really bad and need a break then I take LOTS of sleep tablets and ANXIETY tablets and this gives me a break from all the suicial thoughts and self harm thoughts... I do this at night time btw not during the day... during the day I just take anxiety tablets.... I seem to always wake up early though after taking so many sleep tablets.. its quite annoying as I want to sleep, sleep, sleep so I can have less pain for the day!
 
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