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Have You Ever Been Rude to People Because You Were Socially Anxious?

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IsaD

Active member
Joined
Jun 19, 2020
Messages
41
Location
NY
This is an issue that effects my social anxiety too. Either I feel like I'm overcompensating to not be rude, or I'm not compensating enough, so I actually might be coming off as rude. There never seems to be any middle ground.
I do that too
 
Zero One

Zero One

Well-known member
Joined
May 19, 2020
Messages
2,564
Location
United States
Have you ever been rude to people because you were frustrated with always being socially anxious around them?
I ignored a neighbor (rudely) and it's inexcusable behavior, I know, but I don't know what to do at this point.
I feel like it's too late to start greeting him. I'll just say hi or apologize the next time I walk past him. Has anyone ever been in a situation like this?
This happened to me with one neighbor but he said hello in a really rude tone when I looked back at him after ignoring him.
 
E

Elisante

Taking a break
Joined
May 16, 2020
Messages
847
Location
Greece
There's nothing wrong with being rude. You people may come across as rude unintentionally. I deliberately go out of my way to be rude. One of you said he has a hard time making eye contact and that may be interpreted as being rude. I, on the other hand, stare the one who greets me right into his eyes with a blank expression and stony silence.
Why
 
S

standon

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 21, 2015
Messages
741
Location
sheffield
Many many times n again not intentional but it tends to get me out of situations I don't want to be in probably not the best way to deal with it and it is also annoying for people around me it's so draining trying to be something you are not I do always feel bad though which then adds to my worries like a viscous circle
 
T

TyFence

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 21, 2020
Messages
202
Location
NorCal
When I awkward nothing comes out right. But then a nice hello can set the record straight and heal a lot of stuff. Hi sorry not trying to be rude- if you want to get in a conversation. When depressed kinda oblivious to people. I don’t feel OK too. But when you can manage it... it’s never to late to be nice and forgive.
 
jajingna

jajingna

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
753
Location
Canada
Been misunderstood many times. The behavior was not how I wanted to act but the anxiety steered me that way. Hard to explain that to anybody. They just see your actions or hear your words unless they know you well. Most people make most things about themselves, most of the time. They might take your actions/words personally, not having a clue you were just feeling anxious and awkward and wished you didn't. It's a weird thing to experience this so frequently.
 
T

TyFence

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 21, 2020
Messages
202
Location
NorCal
Been misunderstood many times. The behavior was not how I wanted to act but the anxiety steered
I understand, ah sorry. The anxiety is kinda in control sometimes. You don’t have to let it be. Keep fighting it. Gods blessings to you.
 
A

alma18

Member
Joined
Feb 1, 2018
Messages
14
many times. you just have to forgive yourself for it really :)
 
OddballOut

OddballOut

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 15, 2020
Messages
57
Location
Canada
I come across as rude constantly in real life. And when I make the same mistakes, or think I make some social blunder, every single one comes up again and I go through them all and tell myself how shitty I am as a person.
🙄

Getting better nowadays at 1) vaguely explaining my anxiety disorder to people if i think i've offended them - if the relationship is important enough and needed in the future 2) recognizing that I can't please everyone and 3) everyone has off days and if the person i was accidentally rude to isn't capable of forgiveness or compassion then I don't really want to have any kind of relationship with them anyways. closed minded people- yuck! no thanks.

It's difficult and we feel rude and stupid but we really don't need more to stress about right? Some things, we gotta let go.
 
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