Have just came to the realisation that I subconsciously deprive myself of food because I feel unworthy of eating it.

[Niamh12]

I Have just came to the realisation that I subconsciously deprive myself of food because I feel unworthy of eating it-I had always thought it was just because I was a picky eater.Its really upsetting me and I’m only now peicing together the reasons for my fatigue and ,poor concentration.I am no longer in denial that there isn’t something wrong and have come to terms with the fact this is not normal.How do I go on from here ,I’m terrified that I will go on like this for years and i feel like my life has already passed my by in a blur i barley had to energy to experience to the fullest.How to I take control?

 

[EstherRose94]

I used to do that to a certain extent when my anxiety was bad. I started drinking protein shakes and basically just encouraging myself to eat what and when I felt up to eating. Using some positive internal talk, telling myself good job if I ate. I think actually once you get over the hump and eat enough you will feel a bit better and the rest can start to improve too.

 

[Ceterisum]

When you are feeling unworthy of eating you also don't have appetite at all. I know it well.

I think first you should force yourself to eat. Easy, simple meals, but rich in nutrients. And than gradually increase the calories and introduce new aliments.
Be careful subnutrion can be dangerous to your health.
And you have no reason to feel like that...its a basic need... we all eat, it is not a sin, it is not a crime.

Take vitamines and supplements if needed in the beginning.
But it is better to take those vitamins, nutrients etc from food.

 

[Ceterisum]

And see a doctor if you think will help

 

[Niamh12]

Thanks guys

 

[george81]

I'm sorry you feel this way. I think I do the same too, I don't allow myself to eat much now as I don't feel I deserve to eat and I deserve to starve. I think the advice you've received so far from people on here is really good and it might be a good idea to go to the doctor and speak to them. I guess you really need to understand why you feel the way you do about yourself in order to change your thought processes and feel more comfortable around food and eating. I hope you start to feel better about yourself soon and start enjoying eating x

 

[EstherRose94]

I'm sorry you feel this way. I think I do the same too, I don't allow myself to eat much now as I don't feel I deserve to eat and I deserve to starve. I think the advice you've received so far from people on here is really good and it might be a good idea to go to the doctor and speak to them. I guess you really need to understand why you feel the way you do about yourself in order to change your thought processes and feel more comfortable around food and eating. I hope you start to feel better about yourself soon and start enjoying eating x

agreed that you need to address the root of the problem but your cognitive faculties aren’t going to be at their prime if you’re not eating enough. So it’ll be best to tackle those tougher questions once you have a few solid days of getting enough nutrition. Also when you eat at first your sugar spike could cause anxiety but it will go away super fast after eating. Don’t let that deter you.

 

[QooQooQat]

Greetings;

New to the site. Old to the issue.

I find it difficult to believe that my stress and depression are subconsciously strong enough to stop me from eating. I KNOW my cells need more than they are getting. But when I think of food or eating, I just tense up.

And yet we cannot find a SINGLE THING WRONG other than the neuro/skeletal issues in my neck, and my ‘degenerative’ hips.

MY latest conclusion is ‘Idiopathic Intercostal Neuralgia’. ‘Without cause, spontaneous’, between the ribs, misfiring of nerve impulses.

It gets worse when pressure builds up. Like when a GERD is developing. My head gets dizzy, then the rest of me feels like yuck, and then the retching starts. Like a cat trying to throw a hail ball. That goes on for a couple minutes, until the BIG burp finally gets out. And the I feel OK again.

And my neurologist says that nothing in my neck would be affecting discomfort in my chest. That IS why my hands and arms are losing coordination and going numb.

I have had
- Chest and neck MRI: Pretty much C-1 through C7 is junk. Between bone spurs, 'degeneration', compromised nerves, it's a classic train wreck. And they can't get the crane in to clear the tracks. The neurologist asserts that the damage is pretty much only responsible for numbness and discoordination in arms and legs, and not affecting anything thoracic or digestive.

- Thoracic and abdominal CT scans - Clearer than I used to keep my fish tank.

- Pulmonary specialist: 'Amazed' that with my childhood in the 'industrial east, and adulthood in the world's top breeding ground for Valley Fever, my lungs are strikingly clear!

- Thrice to the cardiologist. 'You have a good heart.' Your circulation is fine.'

My old GP of 30+ years retired. But he handed me off to another at the same practice. She had me go to a vascular specialist anyhow, who said, as did the cardiologist after checking BP at ankle and wrists, pre and post 'exercise', 'Your left leg is a tad lighter than your right. But NOT ENOUGH to warrant risk of damaging the structural integrity of the system.

I can sort of feel my 'brain' (NOT my MIND) 'fall asleep' the way your arm of leg does when you cross it when I lie down. Sometimes it is tolerable and I stay there. Sometimes it is not and i have to get up. It does not take long for one arm or the other to go numb, depending on which side I lie on.

Again, the wrecked neck at blame…

Don't know what is to blame for the lack of interest in eating. It DID take a dive after discovering the gruesome end to one of my DEAREST cats.

Recent 'Traumas'
- House caught fire in Nov 2012. We were providing for four 'homeless' cats. ANd now the provider was homeless!
I came out with a whole now concept of 'homeless', and started tending to and ultimately acquiring cats. We now provide a home to nigh onto 30. Some inside, some contained outside, and some free-roaming.

- Lost mom in 2017. My 'whatever' fan and supporter. Lost my dad in 2007.

- Lost my siblings in 2018. When they went to Trumpland

- Lost TWO of my DEAREST cats. Ones that became REAL companions!

- Lost a third that was just precious

- Lost a neighbor of 30 some years, suddenly, to diagnosis of dementia.

- Developers built a fence between my yard and next door. AN open space i have been relishing for 30 years in this house. We had only a chain link fence between yards, and we frequently chatted over it.

I am in the Arizona Medical Marijuana program. I used 'recreationally' for about 40 years before that.

It seems to be about the only thing that brings relief. Where I once enjoyed it, now I hesitate, and wait as long as I possibly can before indulging again, about every 4 hours, with a dosage of about .4 grams, smoked.

I HATE that is cost me so much just to keep me at a sustainable lever. Not 'good', but tolerable. And being out of 'discomfort' does NOT equate to 'ready and able'. It doesn't hurt as much, but I still can't stand up and function, do dishes, laundry, vaccum, etc...

Boy, that's a lot to digest.

(=