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Has anyone had an experience like this one? (voices taking control of your body)

S

silentMur

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Hey there, I hope you're all doing great.
I've been hearing voices for as long as I can remember, each one of them has their own personality and opinions. I've been trying to comunicate more with them lately so that we can get along better, and one of them told me that he's the one that he had been taking control of my body in those moments when abuse was going on and I didn't remember what happened afterwards.
Yesterday he took control of my hands; my hands went numb and he started typing on my phone to one of my friends that I was talking to. It was very weird, it felt like being a bit sleepy, I could see what was going on but I didn't feel completely "there". I often dissociate, this felt like that, but being able to see what was going on. The best way I can describe it was like looking out of a cloudy window. He often takes control of my body when I feel threatened, and in those times it's like being in the passenger seat of a car watching the other person drive.
We are getting along much better ever since I started calling him by his name and actively listening to him with a more open mind. I had been diagnosed with auditory hallucinations, but I can only hear him and the others in my head, not with my ears, that's why I came to the conclusion that there's some people living in my head.
Has anyone had an experience like this one with hearing voices?
Thanks for reading~
 
S

SunnyDaze

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Hi there. I think it's probably a good idea to talk with a professional about this.

I would hate to say it sounds like DID or another disorder if that's not what it is.
 
S

silentMur

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I mentioned it in the past two sessions with my therapist, but they aren't sure what it is. I looked a bit into DID and it seems my symptoms line up...
My therapist had written down a diagnosis code that mentioned delusions, and this voice in my head got offended by it, when I told the therapist she reassured him that he's real and it isn't a final diagnosis.
I'm afraid to bring the hypotesis of DID up to my therapist cause I don't want her to think that I want to be diagnosed with that or fishing for a diagnosis. I've always been told that whatever is haunting me I just imagined, but what if there is trauma that I have locked up? I don't know...
If it is that, then I assume it would be a good idea to build a bettter relantionship with the voices? I know there's more of them, the main one told me so, but so far I only managed to contact two of them.

EDIT: please don't think im self diagnosing, I don't like doing that and I know It's not ok, I'm just considering the possibilities
 
H

HumbleHubby

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I mentioned it in the past two sessions with my therapist, but they aren't sure what it is. I looked a bit into DID and it seems my symptoms line up...
My therapist had written down a diagnosis code that mentioned delusions, and this voice in my head got offended by it, when I told the therapist she reassured him that he's real and it isn't a final diagnosis.
I'm afraid to bring the hypotesis of DID up to my therapist cause I don't want her to think that I want to be diagnosed with that or fishing for a diagnosis. I've always been told that whatever is haunting me I just imagined, but what if there is trauma that I have locked up? I don't know...
If it is that, then I assume it would be a good idea to build a bettter relantionship with the voices? I know there's more of them, the main one told me so, but so far I only managed to contact two of them.

EDIT: please don't think im self diagnosing, I don't like doing that and I know It's not ok, I'm just considering the possibilities
I have DID / Multiple Personality Disorder was diagnosed with this last year, welcome to the world! I have the exact same symptoms.

It would keep talking to a Psy professional MPD/DID isn't really covered by most and a lot of the forums for DID I have to say I don't believe personally, as I know what MPD/DID is because it nearly ruined my marriage and cost me 4 different jobs in 2 years.
 
S

silentMur

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I have DID / Multiple Personality Disorder was diagnosed with this last year, welcome to the world! I have the exact same symptoms.

It would keep talking to a Psy professional MPD/DID isn't really covered by most and a lot of the forums for DID I have to say I don't believe personally, as I know what MPD/DID is because it nearly ruined my marriage and cost me 4 different jobs in 2 years.
Thank you! What would you recommend doing in my situation? Should I keep trying to open communication with the voices? How should I bring it up to my psychiatrist and therapist? I'm sorry if these are dumb questions, I'm a bit lost. Looking into this, it seems to explain a lot of things that happened to me throughout my life...
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

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I believe we each carry with us another consciousness, kind of like a twin brother/sister within us, they're born with us, grow with us, learn along side us and influence us by giving us ideas and thoughts that we think are our own.

A book I've read called 'the Daemon - a guide to your extraordinary secret self' claims that scientists discovered back in the 60's that we have two minds sharing the one body, they're our right hemisphere of the brain and we're the left.

Why it's not common knowledge by know I have no idea but it seems our inner friends like to keep to themselves mostly, it's only a few of us that actually speak to them person to person.

Mine has been speaking to me for nearly four years, he decided to talk so he could manipulate me more easily in some really terrible ways, he's pretty much a sociopath and psychopath and never shuts up which was handy for getting to know him and what he can do but now it's come to the point where I'd like a little peace and quiet but he refuses to be silent for any decent amount of time.

He could also take control of our body, when he did he acted out his twisted fantasies which made me seem paranoid and delusional to those around me so I was admitted to a ward for nine days where he decided to stop so I wouldn't be in there for long, purely self serving on his part.

It was a few months after coming out of hospital he started up again but this time was a little more careful not to get me sent back in. But after a while I found out who and what he was and I confronted him with my suspicions which he reluctantly validated.

I found several ways that he can take control of our body and become the driver instead of being just a passenger but thankfully anti-psychotics have stopped his ability to do that to me.

I don't talk to mine any more because of his bad behaviour but to others I recommend getting to know yours and find out what they want out of life because it's a very nice thing to share your life with them.

I found a way to give mine the illusion of having control of the body, he thinks about what he wants me to do and I do it and it's just like he has full control over the body but I can stop it any time I want, so I've offered him anything from 30 mins to 2 hours a day in control of the body to do whatever he wants within reason (play video games mostly) and I offered to give him money to buy new games or whatever else he wants to buy and to talk to him once again in exchange for some silence when I need it but he refuses my terms completely.
 
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silentMur

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That's very interesting! I had never heard it put like that.
To me this voice started out as a mean person telling me everything that I was doing wrong, and in the past few days that we've been communicating he has insinuated that he was so antagonistic because he had to endure all the pain while I would just forget what had happened and he was mad at me for that. He actually told me what happened a couple of years ago and it made me very depressed and now we kind of share the memory and we both have to live with it (he remembers it perfectly and I just know that it happened but don't know the exact details).
I'm on anti-psychotics too, and they really do help control his impulses (he's the more impulsive one and the one that harms our body) and my paranoid thoughts.
A couple of weeks ago I started letting him do some things for us, like doing our hair and choosing clothes, it works very well because we have a similar sense of fashion haha. I told one of my friends about him and he's been communicating with them a little bit.
He told me he's not the only one who lives in my head, so far we discovered one more that wants to come out and do stuff, and we fear there might be another one lurking in the shadows (I say "fear" because if he is who we think it may be, he could be dangerous).
I want to work towards understanding them and finding the rest, I think it would be beneficial for all of us to be on the same page...
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

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I could be wrong about everything, I consider that possibility every day but all of my experience so far tells me it's just him and me, my yin to his yang.

But in theory the brain does have enough power to run quite a few personalities.

Did he ever show you what he can do before he was medicated? Not many do but mine is a bit off a show-off, ask him if he has any special abilities to make up for him being the passenger in the body, I'd be very interested to hear what he has to say about that.
 
H

HumbleHubby

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Thank you! What would you recommend doing in my situation? Should I keep trying to open communication with the voices? How should I bring it up to my psychiatrist and therapist? I'm sorry if these are dumb questions, I'm a bit lost. Looking into this, it seems to explain a lot of things that happened to me throughout my life...
Be as open and honest to your Psychiatrist and Therapist that's the most ideal advice I would give. I am on Antipsychotics too (5mg Risperidone) and since then I have not had a personality change at all and the number of voices I have has been lowered significantly. The more info you give your Psy and Therapist the better because it will provide you with clarity, potentially a diagnosis and once you know what it is you can then deal with it.

I have to say what you are sharing is what I had exactly. Except the last time my personality changed it was my female alter and she took control for over a month and a half (I was admitted to hospital straight after this). I had hardly any memory and the consequences were large so I learned what happened from my wife, friends and colleagues.

Sometimes, alters have repressed emotions that you as a person have not been able to let out or talk about, this then creates a dissociation within yourself which leads to lack of control and memory or if there is memory there is patchy.

I know when I first started to change personality, the voices were there but it took a day or so for the personality to keep battering me and eventually take over. It's not like split or Glass where you just change like Boom. It's just ridiculous.

I would start a conversation with your voices, say you can give them air time 30 minutes everyday at the same time, this way you are in control. Write a list of questions in advance you want to ask and control the conversation.

If you become weak and let the voices turn into personalities who take you over this is too dangerous, a tactic I used is when I feel it coming on I get an ice cube or cold water in a mug and put in against my forehead, the shock of cold is proven to jolt your nervous system and can put a stop to the change, again this worked for me.

Another tactic if they keep talking is be creative, if you are creative you use the other side of your brain it provides respite with you and voices and lets you get satisfaction from a creative outlet like drawing maybe one drawing a day for 30 minutes, singing, listening to classical music, knitting (I do knitting - works magical wonders).
 
EdEd

EdEd

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My voices aren't able to take control of my body because I dont allow it...or it has yet to happen... I've lost my cool before and trashed and broke an entire apartment brutally...but I still was the one responsible for these actions.. I was in control...but out of control... if that makes sense.
 
ABell

ABell

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Hey there, I hope you're all doing great.
I've been hearing voices for as long as I can remember, each one of them has their own personality and opinions. I've been trying to comunicate more with them lately so that we can get along better, and one of them told me that he's the one that he had been taking control of my body in those moments when abuse was going on and I didn't remember what happened afterwards.
Yesterday he took control of my hands; my hands went numb and he started typing on my phone to one of my friends that I was talking to. It was very weird, it felt like being a bit sleepy, I could see what was going on but I didn't feel completely "there". I often dissociate, this felt like that, but being able to see what was going on. The best way I can describe it was like looking out of a cloudy window. He often takes control of my body when I feel threatened, and in those times it's like being in the passenger seat of a car watching the other person drive.
We are getting along much better ever since I started calling him by his name and actively listening to him with a more open mind. I had been diagnosed with auditory hallucinations, but I can only hear him and the others in my head, not with my ears, that's why I came to the conclusion that there's some people living in my head.
Has anyone had an experience like this one with hearing voices?
Thanks for reading~
Yes, I call it channelling. I get really calm and still and I let my brothers or sisters speak through me. They say they are extensions of me and that I am an extension of them.
Sometimes I accidentally let disembodied souls in because I was not fully used to channelling and I would get people who would hurt and bother me.
I do remember a woman who lived inside my head when I was younger. She cared for me like a real mother would. She spoke in a warm and kind tone.
I know the numbing feeling well, sometimes when it happens out of the blue I just sit there in amazement watching my hands from inside my eyes.
I find people with like you amazing!
 
HiImAnn

HiImAnn

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My voices are constantly trying to push me out of my life and steal precious moments from me. They push me into corners of my mind. They force me into mental corners. You need to fight them as much as you can. It's your life, you were placed here for a reason. Nobody should be in direct or indirect control of you.
 
E

edilau

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Hey there, I hope you're all doing great.
I've been hearing voices for as long as I can remember, each one of them has their own personality and opinions. I've been trying to comunicate more with them lately so that we can get along better, and one of them told me that he's the one that he had been taking control of my body in those moments when abuse was going on and I didn't remember what happened afterwards.
Yesterday he took control of my hands; my hands went numb and he started typing on my phone to one of my friends that I was talking to. It was very weird, it felt like being a bit sleepy, I could see what was going on but I didn't feel completely "there". I often dissociate, this felt like that, but being able to see what was going on. The best way I can describe it was like looking out of a cloudy window. He often takes control of my body when I feel threatened, and in those times it's like being in the passenger seat of a car watching the other person drive.
We are getting along much better ever since I started calling him by his name and actively listening to him with a more open mind. I had been diagnosed with auditory hallucinations, but I can only hear him and the others in my head, not with my ears, that's why I came to the conclusion that there's some people living in my head.
Has anyone had an experience like this one with hearing voices?
Thanks for reading~
me too, not one but many of them. Sometime, i didn't know the final decision I make is my decision or theirs. They are busy body making all sorts of decision on your behalf.
 
E

edilau

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Mar 14, 2016
Messages
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My voices are constantly trying to push me out of my life and steal precious moments from me. They push me into corners of my mind. They force me into mental corners. You need to fight them as much as you can. It's your life, you were placed here for a reason. Nobody should be in direct or indirect control of you.
true, I also have that sort of experience.
 
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