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Had enough

K

Katie84

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 11, 2009
Messages
68
Location
Sheffield
Ok, i have had enough now i want off this ride, i dont want to be bipolar and stuck on meds for the rest of my life, i am only 25 i feel 55, just sick of it :(

Some days i feel like i have made everything up and there is nothing wrong with me, then i hit reality and see i am still ill.

Sorry to moan i just need to get it off my chest, hope everyone else is ok x
 
emski

emski

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 15, 2008
Messages
1,151
Location
North West
Sorry to hear you're having a tough time. We have that feeling sometimes. May I ask when your biploar started and how old you were when you were diagnosed?

:grouphug:
 
M

mad as a hatter

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 23, 2008
Messages
2,167
Location
scotland
hi katie

ur not moaning at all i understand i,ve also got bipolor and it,s very difficult 2 live with i went yrs not taking meds cause the same as u i didn,t want 2 be bipolor but i soon adjusted it,s took along time and some days r hard but if taking meds help in the slightest bit u should tk them
 
K

Katie84

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 11, 2009
Messages
68
Location
Sheffield
Hi, thanks everyone i was diagnosed last year (september, was 24 at the time) and still trying to get the right level of meds, i was told my BP started when i was 16 just after i was raped and went well a little funny.
 
S

skyblue

Guest
Sorry to hear you're feeling bad at the mo. I'm feeling just the same right now. I thought i'd found a balance; the right combination of meds, but it seems that I haven't:cry:. Maybe I'm just expecting too much from the meds - I don't know, but for the past few days it's really hit me.

I keep thinking that i'll be fine without the meds, infact better and thinking that the last major episodes didn't really happen and also 'what if the docs have misdiagnosed me and I haven't got Bipolar at all':unsure:. I don't know what's happening with me lately, all I know is I'm feeling so unwell right now. I've been taking various medications for 17yrs and i'm tired of it:cry:.

Wishing you well.
 
emski

emski

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 15, 2008
Messages
1,151
Location
North West
I was diagnosed 2 years ago (aged 26) but have had problems also since aged 16. It is still hard sometimes to accept - I think it always will be at some point or other in time. And I too share the thoughts that what if they have got it wrong and I don't need to be on this medication - but messing with it just never does me any favours. Then there times when I see the gift and curse of it.

Keep going :grouphug:
 
T

towanda

Member
Joined
Feb 21, 2010
Messages
5
i understand

i was diagnosed four years ago with type 2 bipolar, though i have been diagnosed and re-diagnosed for many years with a variety of conditions. i know what its like to be fed up. in addition to my plethora of mental health issues i also have many physical problems, to which i have no doubt are entirely entwined with my mental health. i have tried to take myself off my meds, which ended up being a realllly bad thing. i hate being dependent on these pharmasuticals, that could possibly be more detrimental in the long term. i hate feeling alone, and tired of life. i keep going because of my little girl, though i fear one day, when she is grown, i may decide enough is enough. i hold on to the hope that one day, i will find some sort of inner peace, even just enough to sustain me. i know life is pain for everyone, and sometimes i feel like maybe i am just a whiney ass person, who is weak, and can't cope as well as everyone. i am off the hospital tonight in fact, as i cannot wait another day for a consultant. been waiting for three months, and i feel like my brain cannot wait any longer. i like this forum, as i don't feel quite so alone in the world. i hope you feel better anyways...and to know that you are not alone
 
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M

magdalen

Member
Joined
Feb 4, 2010
Messages
6
Location
West Midlands
Sorry you're going through this horrible time. The resentment you feel is understandable. I'm too tired to say much at the moment but wanted you to know I've read your thread and hope you feel a little more settled soon. Take care.
 
Dave.P

Dave.P

Member
Joined
Feb 10, 2010
Messages
12
Location
Preston
Never a dull moment

Hey Katie, I'm 28 and it's really got to me over the past month. I have rapid-cycling so there is never a dull moment. It's such a sod this mad lark, the meds, the apologies, the ups and downs, and it's hard work too!
I think I'm sporting the 'if you don't laugh, you'll cry' attitude these days. Being ill is such a ball ache that to counter I'm enjoying life where I can. We all feel so down somedays that we deserve to get our kicks where we can get them, even if it's just a distraction.
I know it's easier for me to say this, I'm enjoying a little high at the moment, but I'm determined to enjoy some aspects of my madness. It could make us rich one day and I'm afraid however we dress it up with meds and psycho-babble, we are stuck with our depressions. Could be worse, we could all be boring! It's who we are, and you are not alone.
I realised that 'resistance is futile' to my bipolar and that I was battling myself, no beast. It became clearer that I need to work with it, not agaisnt it. Well for now anyway....

A man goes to a psychiatrist and says. 'Doc, my brother's crazy, he thinks he's a chicken.'
The Doctor says, 'Why don't you turn him in?'
the guy says, 'We would. But we need the eggs.'

Take care, chin up, stomache in and chest out.
 
keepsafe

keepsafe

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 15, 2008
Messages
13,623
Well done Dave P for being so positive!
 
K

Katie84

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 11, 2009
Messages
68
Location
Sheffield
Thanks for the messages, think im just going through a rough patch, i am getting really bad back ache at the minute which isnt helping, my knees, hands, ankles and arms are playing up too, god in 25 and falling apart lmao never mind sure dr can fix me when i go tomorrow :)
 
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