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Guilty..

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Deremna

Guest
My mom is currently undergoing chemotherapy and radiation for lung cancer. Today, she had to have a blood clot removed and is therefore in a lot of pain. I haven't been sleeping very well for a week and am very depressed because of it.. Now I am feeling guilty for feeling sad when my mom is going through so much right now.. I also feel guilty that I had to have my dad call to renew my house insurance because I just can't bring myself to call.. I get really sick to my stomach just thinking about calling. I don't know.. I just feel like my problems shouldn't matter right now yet they are debilitating to me.
 
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warriorprincess

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 14, 2010
Messages
1,306
Location
Cool St, Coolville
hey try not feel too bad i know how you're feeling believe me, but concentrate on what you can do and not on what you're not doing. Just try not to expect too much from yourself at the mo, people who care about you will not be thinking anything of it - like your mum and dad for example. I know it doesn't stop us worrying though, but they do it cuz they love you, not cuz they have to.

sorry i can't write more but i hope things pick up for you soon. it must be a huge strain seeing your mum going through all that at the moment too - it's probably that and a lot of big things going on that make the trivial things seem harder at the moment. peace and love to you xxx
 
megirl

megirl

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 9, 2010
Messages
8,169
Location
NZ
Please dont feel guilty. You arent feeling depressed because you want to it is an illness the same as any illness your Mum is crook and obviously you are not 100% either, try cut yourself some slack and dont be too hard on yourself. Just being there for your Mum is an achievement in it self
 
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Deremna

Guest
Thank you for your replies.. I know if I told my mom how I feel, she'd probably yell at me for it. She had pretty severe OCD and depression when I was a wee one so she understands how I feel. She told me the other day that neither one of us can help what's going on right now; we both just have to concentrate on getting better. So I am trying not to let it get to me too much.. But it's hard. I always feel guilty for one thing or another..
 
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