Going crazy

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Nina998

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#1
I m going crazy with depression. I am not particularly low but I can't do a thing. I have no energy nor willpower to do anything. I am staring at my phone and same pages all over again. I don't eat so that also makes me weak. Even if I decided I want to do something, I can't make a decision. My kids keep suggesting things to do but I say No.
 
megirl

megirl

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#3
Have you seen a doctor sounds you really need to asap things can better truly they can
 
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Nina998

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#4
Have you seen a doctor sounds you really need to asap things can better truly they can
My psychiatrist is leaving me, I've got an appointment with a new doctor in August. Before that meetings with a nurse. The last three depressive episodes have led to psych ward so I am worried how aggressive this is.
 
megirl

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#5
I can imagine how hard it would be for me if my psychiatrist left the area.
For me admission to the psych ward seemed like the worst place ever.
But to be honest being there when I needed if was the best place to be. I didn't need to worry about the every day stuff. I could get help and support for what I needed at that time. They got to monitor me and my meds and adjust them as needed.
 
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Nina998

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#6
I am also growing some anxiety towards my neighbours. I think they are monitoring everything I do. If I hear their voices outside I think they are talking ill about me. I know they are probably not but I can't help thinking that. These delusions have been going on and off for a good four or five years.
 
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Nina998

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#7
One thing I did today was a timeline of my life. I've got everything and at the same time my life's a mess. I mean, I am married, mother of three, I have a good job and lot of friends and nice family. Even got the good looks. How is it possible to be so f*ucked up when I have EVERYTHING?!

Making a timeline was an interesting experience. It gave me a bigger picture of my life and with all that informaation I will be able to give a better picture of my life and all phases and symptoms to my new doctor.
 
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Nina998

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#8
I bought a 22h cruise to Tallinna (Estonia) from here, Helsinki with my two girls. It's tomorrow. So now I HAVE to get off the bed and do some fun. Tallinn is a nice city, we have four hours to do shopping.
 
letmein

letmein

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#9
I m going crazy with depression. My kids keep suggesting things to do but I say No.
so me, I lost it in 1996, and not really been well since.. I'm stuck in a coulcil flat and stuck is the right word...

:(
 
letmein

letmein

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#10
My psychiatrist is leaving me, I've got an appointment with a new doctor in August. Before that meetings with a nurse. The last three depressive episodes have led to psych ward so I am worried how aggressive this is.
where do you life?
 
letmein

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#12
I would love to visit, do you want afriend? your english is brill..
 
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Nina998

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#13
so me, I lost it in 1996, and not really been well since.. I'm stuck in a coulcil flat and stuck is the right word...

:(
Depression got me in 1997 at the age of 13. I am now 34 years old and every single day of my life have been a struggle. It's frustrating to wake up every morning when every day is a fight to survive.
 
letmein

letmein

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#15
It's frustrating to wake up every morning when every day is a fight to survive.
such a young age, sorry I was about 13 when thigs went wrong for me..

each day i ahve to talk myself out of doing somethingw rong, I have now being crying for 4 days..... never felt so low.
 
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Nina998

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#16
letmein, I am sorry to hear you are going through such difficult time. It's good that you are still crying though. From my experience, things get ugly when crying stops. Numb is a dangerous state of mind. I wish I could help you somehow. A virtual hug is all I've got.
 
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Nina998

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#17
After long day in bed I did little self-harming to feel alive. Stupid habbit. I was clear two months but I have relapsed again. I haven't gotten up all day except to make coffee. I haven't even eaten anything. I am not hungry but it's also intentional.
 
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Nina998

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#18
I am exhausted. Had a meeting with a social worker and later psychologist's interview with my 8-year-old.

The social worker said that I don't have to be brave when I am clearly not functioning well. She said that I don't have to be ok and try so hard. It's okay to be not okay. She said I should accept some help.
 
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Nina998

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#19
It's been hard. I haven't eaten for about two weeks. At dinner I try to eat some but that's it. I have symptoms of lithium toxicacy but nothing dangerous yet. I've been there before. Some days I feel numb and some days I hurt so much. My coping mechanism is self-harm. It's getting out of control. But I am not there yet, I am not ready to die.
 
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Nina998

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#20
These days are intolerable. I feel sick of life. And I feel guilty of not getting off the bed and not getting anything done. I have no purpose. I can't take this anymore. It's been only three weeks but this is not way to live. This needs to stop.
 

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