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Girlfriend having mixed emotions for me because of bpd

R

rajah2099

New member
Joined
Oct 14, 2021
Messages
1
Location
Georgia
I have been dating this girl for about 5 months now and she just recently told me she is pretty certain she has bpd. She said she is going to start seeing a therapist for it but feels like being in a relationship with me is going to make it more difficult. She said she's not sure if the feelings she has for me are real or if its the bpd. She told me sometimes she loves spending time with me and thinks i'm an amazing person and then a little while later she doesn't want to be around me and wants space. She wants to break up because she thinks that if her feelings for me aren't real it would be easier to do so now than later. I agree that it would be easier if her feelings weren't real but personally I feel like her feelings for me are real and the bpd is making her think that they aren't. I have spent a lot of time learning about bpd and what I can do to help her and make our relationship work. I feel like us breaking up is not going to help her situation and i'm trying to convince her of that. I really love this girl and I want our relationship to work. Can anyone here offer some kind of insight as to what is going on and what I can do to better this situation?
 
M

Mistral

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 28, 2011
Messages
696
"It is me not you" is the oldest breakup line in the book. She might have BDP or she might not. If she does, then it does not change things. If you do not want to break up with her, I would completely ignore the suspected BPD.
 
SoftRain

SoftRain

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 26, 2016
Messages
3,433
Location
sillyville, USA
Time will tell the outcome.
I would just freely give her the space she needs and be there when she needs it. Explain to her you are very willing to do that if you havent already. I wish you all the best.
 

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