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Girl boy friendships?

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Beth_24

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May 12, 2020
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United Kingdom
I’m close friends with a boy and I feel no one understands! I’ve been engaged for many years and have zero romantic feelings for my friend we are just friends! For some reason this Is a huge deal and people are loving to gossip about it and it’s just really getting me down as I’m unsure who to even Trust anymore or even if I wanna tell anyone when we do go out? Does anyone have any advice I could say when people do decide to wind me up or make jokes? My partner is fully aware we are friends and is very supportive as he has female friends himself
 
Lavender_Rose

Lavender_Rose

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Apr 12, 2020
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I in general do not have guy friends but I do have one or two. I get that too where people wanna make jokes or tease you. It only seems to make it worse when you deny it too, especially since I I embarrass easy. One of the guys was my good friend so I felt comfortable doing this but I embraced it. When someone said something I was just like yup I'm his work wife can't you tell by how much I nag him. He had a girlfriend and a baby. I knew her too. So he was in on the joke it wasnt awkward, even she knew about the joke. It not as funny for people if you dont react to it.
 
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Beth_24

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May 12, 2020
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United Kingdom
Thank you for replying! I think that’s my issue I get embarrassed easily so people do it more because I react? I know people can be stuck in their ways and not believe in friendships but I just feel like I never have a response and just go all like silent haha
 
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Shay94

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Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
453
Location
Balga. Perth
I have a few guy friends, one in particular people still believe we seem to be more than that. But I have a partner, he's very supportive and knows I prefer to be mates with men rather than females as there's so much bitchiness with them. But having anxiety/depression screws me meeting new people/keeping old ones
 
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Beth_24

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May 12, 2020
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United Kingdom
Hi! I know it’s so hard my partner is also supportive and part of me thinks if my partner knows what I’m doing and where I’m going what’s it got to do with anyone else? But I still get bothered about people’s opinions on me!! Yeah that must be hard hope the friends you have are supportive!!
 
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Shay94

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Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
453
Location
Balga. Perth
Hi! I know it’s so hard my partner is also supportive and part of me thinks if my partner knows what I’m doing and where I’m going what’s it got to do with anyone else? But I still get bothered about people’s opinions on me!! Yeah that must be hard hope the friends you have are supportive!!
It is hard, I make plans but then usually cancel last minute coz my anxiety gets too much and I can't handle it. My partner knows I struggle with things but he's so supportive & tries to help me when need be, it shouldn't bother anyone else as long as people close to you are OK with it. I prefer guy friends to females coz there's less drama/bullshit to deal with
 
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Beth_24

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May 12, 2020
Messages
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I’m glad that he is supportive! If you cancel people should understand as I can imagine it’s hard! Especially people who aren’t going through it themselves! Yes I agree weirdly enough the job I do is withlots of girls but get on really well and there’s very rarely any bitching! I think my issue is I just need to start not giving a shit so much and just accepting that I can be friends with who I want!
 
Faith198

Faith198

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Mar 30, 2020
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1,152
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U.S.
People just love to gossip and idk why. There’s nothing wrong with you being friends with a guy. If people wanna start making up rumors like high schoolers, it’s on them. You know where your friendship stands, don’t worry about them :hug:

who knows, maybe their even jealous you have such a good friendship too 🤷🏻‍♀️
 
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Beth_24

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May 12, 2020
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Ah thanks so much this is for sure the kind of reply I wanted Someone who totally gets it haha!! I think that’s what it is just banter to an extent but then I just think if they’re so bothered they could ask him out!!
 
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Shay94

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Apr 10, 2020
Messages
453
Location
Balga. Perth
There's nothing wrong with being mates with a guy, you dont needa worry bout what others are thinking. If they have a problem with it, they can deal with it themselves, you don't have to listen to them. People just like to gossip for the sake of it and coz they got nothing else better to do & usually they focus on other people's lives because theirs is so shitty & they don't feel good bout themselves. Just ignore them and do whats right for you :)
 
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Elisante

ACCOUNT CLOSED
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May 16, 2020
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1,707
Location
Greece
It will attract less attention if you two bring friends with you when you meet up. It will look less like a date and more like a group of friends.
 
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Nukelavee

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Joined
Dec 17, 2019
Messages
3,367
Location
London, ON
I'm male, but I have a lot of close female friends. In my experience, the only BF's who worry about their GF hanging out with me, are the ones likely to be up to something.

And I'm very familiar with people assuming, because we hang out a lot, me and a woman must be a couple. I've had that cause serious issues before, and I'm currently watching it, possibly, happen again.

Biggest issue is getting "the look" from other women when I look at or speak with a woman while with one of my friends.
 
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Beth_24

Member
Joined
May 12, 2020
Messages
13
Location
United Kingdom
I'm male, but I have a lot of close female friends. In my experience, the only BF's who worry about their GF hanging out with me, are the ones likely to be up to something.

And I'm very familiar with people assuming, because we hang out a lot, me and a woman must be a couple. I've had that cause serious issues before, and I'm currently watching it, possibly, happen again.

Biggest issue is getting "the look" from other women when I look at or speak with a woman while with one of my friends.
Hi

thanks for the reply!!
Yeah my partner is totally fine about this but it just seems everyone else enjoys getting involved I guess 😂! I think it’s just A hard thing Because I really don’t see the issue with it! I generally just really get on with him
 
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Beth_24

Member
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May 12, 2020
Messages
13
Location
United Kingdom
There's nothing wrong with being mates with a guy, you dont needa worry bout what others are thinking. If they have a problem with it, they can deal with it themselves, you don't have to listen to them. People just like to gossip for the sake of it and coz they got nothing else better to do & usually they focus on other people's lives because theirs is so shitty & they don't feel good bout themselves. Just ignore them and do whats right for you :)
Thanks so much!! Think that’s the boost I needed haha! I wish I didn’t get so bothered maybe one day haha!
 
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Shay94

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Apr 10, 2020
Messages
453
Location
Balga. Perth
Thanks so much!! Think that’s the boost I needed haha! I wish I didn’t get so bothered maybe one day haha!
No worries, I used to be the exact same as you. I have several guy mates and my partner isn't bothered by it just as long as they don't try to make a move on me. He trusts me 100% and knows I won't do anything to sabotage our relationship, he worries of what others are gonna do. Nowadays if shit does happen, I don't let it bother me, just don't care n do my own thing & remember its their problem not mine
 
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