• Share. Be Supported. Recover.

    We are a friendly, safe community supporting each other's mental health. We are open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.

getting my life back and sorted.

D

Dibzy123

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 31, 2012
Messages
45
Location
essex
So. Bit of a long story. Get a cuppa, put ya feet up n get a choccy biccy because your in for story time.
So I met my baby girls daddy nearly 4 years ago via a dating website. Typical relationship. Great times yet had ups and downs.
He helped me through alot.... Helped me get assessed by mental health and we discoverd I had borderline personality disorder. He's taken a good few slaps etc... Bless him xxxxxx and alot of s*** ovi. I respect him so much for this though. I really do.
We had our daughter 3 weeks early on the 11 Dec 2014. She's fine and healthy!!
well, its always been a bit of a weird relationship. When we met, he lived with his 2 other girls and step son from a previous marriage while their mum moved out with her new fella etc went to work and came to see them daily which was great. Thhhheeeen, her and her fella moved back in and they all lived like happy family's. I got on with this. She then kicked him out on Xmas day 3 years ago so he came to live with me for a year. The council got funny so he was forced to live with his parents where he still is.
Well, since around 2 years ago his attitudes changed. He's stuck up, snobby, rude, intolerable, paranoid yadda yadda yadda. He promises things then either says oh I haven't arranged it yet... Being a year down the line of apparently forgets. Conveniently. He makes me feel soo small and worthless. No amount of talking or yelling at him seems to make him realise what he's doing to my already mashed brain.
He also started taxi work with his uncle in November. And this has made him even more worse. He's now cocky, ignores me, thinks he does more than enough for baby... He does his part but needs alot of improvement. He's made me feel so worthless I don't even wanna b here anymore. Things he does, things he says. Things he doesn't do n say. I'm going back to my doctor to ask to be re assessed by mental health this week. I need help. I cant cope right now!!
So this week we've finally ended it. Well tonight to be exact. We've been moaning about it all week and I finally stopped this rubbish arguing. Gave him a week to sort out what days on a consistant basis each week where he would c baby and told him to pack his crap. I've got better things to do.
The point is, I need support and advice in keeping strong not to fall back to him. I love him alot. I would be lying if I said I didn't wanna be with him. But all it would lead to is more arguing. So that's it. End of.
Thank you so much for reading and I'm sorry if I wasted your evening!!
Much love,
Dibzy xx
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
13,529
Location
The West Country
Hey Dibzy,
It sounds like ultimately you have made the right decision for you, him and your lovely little one.
If he's making you feel so devalued that you "don't even want to be here any more", it's not a healthy relationship and it's better for everybody if the relationship ends.:hug1:

Reading through your post and you describing the way he's been towards you, a part of me wonders if he perhaps wanted to end the relationship but was too scared to and so instead he pushed you away in hopes that you would be the one to end it.
I could be completely wrong and off the mark, but his uncaring attitude would suggest that he's not emotionally invested in the relationship any more.

I think that you will probably need to keep reminding yourself that you've done the right thing.
Try to be aware of your thoughts and if you find yourself over-romanticising him and thinking of only the good times, remind yourself that things haven't been so good.

When a relationship of any sort comes to an ending it can create a void in your life, and so keep as busy as possible and reach out to friends and family for support.
If you can prevent yourself from feeling lonely and getting low, it'll help you stick to your decision.
 
D

Dibzy123

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 31, 2012
Messages
45
Location
essex
Part of me does believe that je did push me away seen as I'm the hot headed one and would of ended it anyway. He's always admitted he'd never end it. Coz hes 'not that type of person' and all. He also admits or tells himself hes alot like he's dad. Devious and gets what he wants without making people realise it.and he is right. So yes. That is probably what he's done.
But that's a good thing he is like that coz its made me strong enough to end it. That you for your reply. It was really helpful and supportive. Thank you xxxxx
 
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
M Getting my life back on track Getting Your Life Back! 3
N Getting you life back but accepting you have an illness Getting Your Life Back! 13
Solitude1 Getting Back to Life... Some Problems Still Exist Getting Your Life Back! 1
J Living with BPD! And my road to diagnosis and getting my life back! Getting Your Life Back! 2
L Day 2 of getting my life back Getting Your Life Back! 4
apple jump to paid part-time job - I'm not sure if this is the right step to getting my life back or not Getting Your Life Back! 20
V New life getting off abilify Getting Your Life Back! 3
J getting my life back Getting Your Life Back! 10
R getting life back Getting Your Life Back! 3
C Getting Help to rebuild my life Getting Your Life Back! 2
A getting ur life back Getting Your Life Back! 5
LORD BURT Getting my life back. Getting Your Life Back! 1
M Getting your life back and how to do it! Getting Your Life Back! 2
F Getting joy back into life Getting Your Life Back! 5
A recovery - getting your life back - what life? Getting Your Life Back! 9
C Getting a Partner. Getting Your Life Back! 15
M Tips for getting out the habit of quitting jobs? Getting Your Life Back! 7
S I am getting it together- but my depression-induced anxiety is still troublesome Getting Your Life Back! 6
Annelis Is there any point getting help? Getting Your Life Back! 5
wollie Getting fit Getting Your Life Back! 3
D Picking up the pieces getting back on track Getting Your Life Back! 3
Screechout Things are getting better (1 year on from my breakdown) Getting Your Life Back! 2
Lilbubble Getting to know yourself - who am I? Getting Your Life Back! 5
D Getting off pills Getting Your Life Back! 3
N [ how to getting back yourlife ?] Getting Your Life Back! 1
NicoretteGummed Getting Into Doctor Who!!! Getting Your Life Back! 1
S Getting out of a CTO Getting Your Life Back! 2
C Let's do this - getting off seroquel and lexapro Getting Your Life Back! 4
M Getting off meds for good help Getting Your Life Back! 1
shaky When you are trying hard and getting nowhere Getting Your Life Back! 2
I still getting accused Getting Your Life Back! 6
W Hi, I've just joined. Getting to better Getting Your Life Back! 4
M My voices are getting worse Getting Your Life Back! 2
E sheer panic of never getting back to happy Getting Your Life Back! 2
Caitjinoy Getting help Getting Your Life Back! 9
R getting back to normal Getting Your Life Back! 5
C Getting to a more positive place Getting Your Life Back! 20
P I have issues getting back to my (supported) flat. Getting Your Life Back! 4
N What are your 'getting better' NY resolutions? Getting Your Life Back! 14
V A good friend commiting suicide, and my road to getting off theese thoughts. Getting Your Life Back! 1
J Help on getting diagnosed required Getting Your Life Back! 2
Mentasm Getting motivated Getting Your Life Back! 11
mrlaurel getting out of the bedroom..... Getting Your Life Back! 23
NicoretteGummed Getting Computer Qualifications!!! Getting Your Life Back! 1
Anime-Alchemy Moving Forward and Getting Better as a Person Getting Your Life Back! 6
R Getting Aspergers removed Getting Your Life Back! 10
M So is anyone else Just getting out of a Rut? Getting Your Life Back! 10
G Getting Through Schizophrenia/Psychosis Getting Your Life Back! 10
D Getting there??... Getting Your Life Back! 1
U small things are getting top me Getting Your Life Back! 5

Similar threads

Top