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    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

Getting it out

I

IrishSonofOdin

New member
Joined
Aug 7, 2020
Messages
4
Location
Massachusetts
So I've have been dealing with depression since I can recall. 8 or 9 wanting to be dead all the time. Very few friends and never treated for it.
I have a lot of other physical conditions like severe asthma since birth (I'm now 50). In high school I started developing essential tremors and they have progressively gotten worse for 35 years with age comes normal vision and hearing issues. When I was 26, I had my first back surgery. Thinking I screwed it up 20+ years later I went to see why I hurt. I had been walking around with a broken neck for a couple of years and had degenerative disk disease. Two weeks out of surgery I had to move, no money and 2 teenage daughters to move all my stuff. Neck never healed correctly. A week latter my appendix ruptured and I almost died from infection. Just last October I had another back surgery. I have severe tinnitus and the ringing never stops. Nore does the pain, the shakes and twitching or the fact that I'm always short of breathe. Now I developed an issue with vertigo due to a TBI I got apparently when I broke my neck.
Now divorced for 12 years and still single, not a friend to talk to, both my girls are adults on their own. Now I have a second Grandchild on the way.
I'm just mentally done with the chronic issues. They wear a person down. Without insurance (I'm on Disability) I can't go to counseling or afford half my meds every month.
My girls don't want to take care of me and I am sick of being sick and alone.
I'd never put the pain be put on my girls, so I suffer so they don't have to. I'm just tired. A kind of tired that sleep will never fix. Adding the stress of this Rona crap and mask Police always confronting me just puts me over the top.
Sorry for the long rant. No one wants to hear the list, at least I was able to get it all out.
 
Droid0669

Droid0669

Member
Joined
Aug 7, 2020
Messages
6
Location
United States
I'm sorry I'm only 30 and I'm in the same boat. The virus has only made everything worse and I feel more isolated I guess the only thing that really keeps me going is the fact that I've had some really great times in my life and tbh I'm just hopeful they'll come around again.
 
P

Prycejosh1987

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2020
Messages
619
Location
UK
I'd never put the pain be put on my girls, so I suffer so they don't have to. I'm just tired. A kind of tired that sleep will never fix. Adding the stress of this Rona crap and mask Police always confronting me just puts me over the top.
I do not think you should suffer, but that you should have their support and support them. It makes things better for you and them.
 
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