Gaming, hoarding, spending, dopamine agonists a problem?

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Trekster33

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#1
Hello all

Are the above activities a compensatory strategy for dopamine agonists? I.e risperdal in my case? Risperdal lowers dopamine so if I'm doing something that increases my dopamine, is that counter productive?

I am addicted to games on my phone. I use them to hide from the world but there's a price to pay. I keep overspending on my games because I'm scared to leave the bubble of them. I can try games without spending for a while but they only help for so long.

Spending also gives me a buzz but keeping track of my finances is very tricky and a nightmare at the best of times. Once I get my laptop back from the repair shop, this should become easier again.

I also have a compulsion to help people that can get out of hand. I fear what might happen to them if I don't sometimes and spend hours helping them and not always attending to my needs. It might be a cptsd thing for me. This doesn't give me a dopamine buzz, it's nice to be nice I'm told. I also might be overthinking this one.

When I was 8 my mum binned a crushed ship I'd made from paper because I'd stood on it by accident whilst I was at school. I started hoarding by hiding my toys at first. Now it's starting to build up again. I had a period of stability where things we're fine but now it's all exploded again and I'm stuck. :(
 
L

Laudanum

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#2
I suspect spending and gaming are ways to make yourself feel temporarily good.

Hoarding is normally a response to loss. I started hoarding 15 years ago after my dog died. Unusually it wasn't just any old rubbish, but good things (so I thought). Unusually, I didn't feel any particular emotional attachment to the objects, and have sold most of them now, although I still have way too much stuff.

It is normally trying to replace what you have lost with something else - lots of it. This stuff won't leave you unless you decide it should.

It is possible that taking medication initially, when it kicks in, can make your eyes bigger than your stomach - you get loads of stuff and take on too much because you might go through a manic phase.
 
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Trekster33

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#3
Yeah I am (have used) using games to give me a temporary happy state.

Can someone without bipolar disorder go through a manic phase? I don't think bipolar is something I have although I do have the wild mood swings associated with cptsd.
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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#4
Well from my experience I played a game called MapleStory. Now this game is a 2d mmo when I was about 14/15 spend some time on it nothing much but a few hours here and there. Stopped playing came back to it at 19/20 life was in a bad spot. Mental health nose-dived on anti-depressants a few suicide attempts. Not getting any good help.

In a hole you could say anyway my point is I played the mmo for a number of reasons. I had friends I played with that I spoke to online these friends are not irl friends but never the less they felt like friends. Which is a problem you should have both irl friends and online friends for balance you can live without irl friends in my personal subjective experience irl friends give more joy.

Even if you found online friends that you could meet up with that is a perfect match but i will get back to the online game. I would lv up in game so it improves my character buy gear for it in the hundreds of pounds £££ all for what? We seek to express ourselves in online games because our lives are not going well this is a bad spot I will admit I was not addicted just lonely and depressed/suicidal I completely quit the game.

And any game because for me games just are not for me I cannot stop if I had plans to go out id much rather play online I have anti-social tendencies. Which are fine but I gotta force myself to be a normie. So I make the conscious decision to not play games now onto your hoarding I have experienced this my best explanation.

Is that I built up walls around me my room completely full of rubbish either from just not noticing it or not having the energy now you may say you do it with toys that are different? it really is not you are filling a void which we all do but is it stopping you from living the life you want ? if you can honestly answer that and say yes i am living the way i want then that's good but if not you need to make changes OP
 
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Trekster33

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#5
Thank you for your responses all yeah I can empathise with a lot of what has been said on here.

I have asocial tendencies due to my autism. I also have a mixture of online and offline friends but they aren't always around to meet up with when I am. Some of my online friends are in another county or country.
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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#6
Thank you for your responses all yeah I can empathise with a lot of what has been said on here.

I have asocial tendencies due to my autism. I also have a mixture of online and offline friends but they aren't always around to meet up with when I am. Some of my online friends are in another county or country.
i also do have a form of autism called aspergers it suchs at times try looking for like-minded people irl think of the things you are into look for local meet ups hope it helps
 
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Trekster33

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#7
Hi I am quite active in local groups but even there I can feel isolated at times. I also run a group of my own.

This year I'm going to the annual retreat run for and by autistics held in the UK.
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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#8
Hi I am quite active in local groups but even there I can feel isolated at times. I also run a group of my own.

This year I'm going to the annual retreat run for and by autistics held in the UK.
really cool you do that dude hoping you can conquer your demons
 
T

Trekster33

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#9
Thank you, I've been doing this for a while it's just the rumination, hoarding and sometimes gaming are getting out of control.

Hoping we can all conquer our demons together.