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GAD

Parissa

Parissa

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 22, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Bedford
I worry about most things most of the time. I worry about everything. I can feel positive, and be positive, but i fear everything. I fear doing things wrong, saying the wrong thing, upsetting others, people talking about me. I think it comes from a supreme lack of confidence, although i have some confidence, underneath i'm a nervous wreck. The psychiatrist thinks it is related to depression, and i have just been discharged following a major depressive episode, but i think it is always with me, depressed or not. It is just worse when depressed. Much worse. I get irrational and panicky about everything. I'm hoping to sort my thoughts out on here and speak with those who are feeling the same and have the same troubles.

I'm due to return to work in the new year, but occupational health are going to get in touch in the new year and we will discuss how i am then. I've been off for about 6 months, and the longer i am off the harder i think it is to go back, but i know i have to eventually.
 
Parissa

Parissa

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 22, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Bedford
:LOL:
KISS
Keep It Simple Stupid
That has been said to me before.
 
Parissa

Parissa

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 22, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Bedford
I haven't been sleeping well. I was on zopiclone when in hospital, and have been given more by my GP. I don't want to take it every night but when i don't take it i remain awake until the early hours. Last night i was awake until 3am. I woke at 7am. I therefore feel very tired today and anxious. My anxiety is worse when i haven't slept.

I have to go back to work in the New Year and i'm already worried about it. I don't have to go back, but i can't put it off any longer. I miss everyone and have had some lovely emails from colleagues. I wish i could go to the Christmas dinner. I can't go if i've been off sick. It wouldn't be right.

I also have been internet dating this last week. I've met two men who want to meet up with me. We have been talking every evening. They seem very nice, but i get nervous about going. My life is just so. Just safe, routined, just the way i like it, but my life is missing that special someone. I have to get out there in the world and get cracking on my future. I've spent the last 6 months hardly leaving my home, seeing anyone.

I hate this pounding in my chest. These tingling fingers. Breathlessness. I still have lorazepam but am reluctant to take it. I need to be able to do this without medication.
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
13,531
Location
The West Country
Hey Parissa,
I think obviously only you can know what's best for you, but just wanted to say that if you are really not coping, the lorazepam is there to help.
It's still early days from when you came out of hospital and you should take as long as you need to feel better.
I understand that perhaps you're eager to get back to work in January even though it's making you anxious, but remember that there's only one you and your well-being is the most important thing. x
 
Parissa

Parissa

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 22, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Bedford
Has anyone tried valerian, hopes, passionflower? I'm so anxious i have shallow breathing. It could be because i've been on the hard stuff for so long. It could be a withdrawal reaction. I have racing thoughts and cannot slow my mind down. I'm not thinking anything in particular, just lots of jumbled thoughts about various unimportant things.

I'm gradually switching my anti depressant to the mornings as the psychiatrist said this may help with my insomnia. I hope it does because i can't go on this way.
 
Parissa

Parissa

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 22, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Bedford
Thank you SomersetScorpio. :hug: I will take the lorazepam if it gets too bad. I'm nervous of becoming too reliant on it. I've had it every day almost for the past month so it is likely i am already addicted. The psychiatrist said to take it only when i get desperate and to try without. I have been taught breathing through my stomach and meditation but get irritated by these types of things. I have too many thoughts in my head which the psychiatrist said is the anti depressant that does this. It makes you wide awake and think more and more quickly.

Love Parissa
 
Kerome

Kerome

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 29, 2013
Messages
12,750
Location
Europe
Well if it's any consolation I just had seven weeks of daily lorazepam (2-4 mg in the evenings) and although coming off it wasn't pleasant it was not that bad... A week of moderate insomnia which I got through with some herbal sleep meds and that was all.

Dr Vogel make a variety of pretty good herbal medicines for sleep and anxiety, they might be worth a try.
 
Parissa

Parissa

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 22, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Bedford
Cheers Kerome, funnily enough i have just been to Holland and Barrett and saw the Vogel sleeping liquid and thought about buying it. I have herbal nytol that i might try tonight. That's great you got off of the lorazepam fairly easily. I didn't sleep again last night, very broken, half an hour here and there. I'm struggling to keep the energy up throughout the days due to this poor sleep. I will hopefully get a better sleep tonight. Last night i had zopiclone and it did very little. I wonder if i am becoming tolerant of it. Ideally i would like to stop all medication except my anti depressant. Maybe i will try that soon. I have a lot on at the moment so need to be alert.

Love Parissa
 
M

monsoon

Member
Joined
Nov 24, 2014
Messages
6
Parissa,

I have tried hypnosis to help with psychosis and anxiety, I am finding these sessions helpful in making me stronger minded, I will be continuing with the hypnosis as I come off Diazapam, and use the Kalms to help me in between sessions

Claire
 
Parissa

Parissa

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 22, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Bedford
Maybe I should try kalms again Claire. I hope the hypnosis works for you. Good luck.

Love Parissa
 
ScaredCat

ScaredCat

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 21, 2012
Messages
8,447
Location
Another planet
I worry about everything too. I am on anti anxiety and anti d. The anti d affected my sleep but the psych increased my anti anxiety med in eve and it seems to be helping with sleep. I havent found herbal stuff to be any good for me but really hope they do help you. Sleep is so important
 
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