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Frightening intrusive thoughts

J

Jaftond

New member
Joined
Jan 22, 2020
Messages
1
Location
Florida
Last night I had an awful nightmare about my dad.

Long back story short: my dad died a couple years ago. Apparently I'm not over it. He abused drugs and emotionally abused my whole family.

In the dream, he and I were talking on the phone. Suddenly, he went silent. I started screaming for him. When he didn't respond I started freaking out. I tried to dial 911 but I couldn't remember his address. I called my brother and got the address then tried calling 911 again. I can't remember if they said they would help but I decide to go to the house. When I get there I find my dad on the floor and there is someone else there. The other thing is faceless and I'm not sure what's going on but my dad is strange. He looks sick and gaunt. As I'm standing there, the faceless thing starts cutting off pieces of my dad until eventually my dad is cutting pieces of himself off and giving them to the faceless thing.

That's the last part I remember.

The images from the dream burned themselves into my mind and I don't think I'll ever be able to forget them. They keep coming to the forefront of my thoughts and it's destroying me. I Iad a panic attack on my way to work this morning and on my way home.

The earliest my therapist can meet with me is tomorrow at 6pm and I'm spiraling. I don't know what I'm looking for here. I just... Needed to tell someone...
 
O

OcdConquerer

Member
Joined
Jan 22, 2020
Messages
6
Location
Canada
Sometime's with my OCD I have a thought or something that I never had before and it scares me. Not just because it's a scary thought in itself, but I develop that fear of it being "burned in my mind" and playing on a loop. Like "oh great" among other things, now I have this. I think that is kind of an irrational fear. But I think if you keep on keeping on it starts to fade out.. even though it seems impossible at times.
 
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