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Forever alone

F

faloser

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Nov 19, 2019
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2
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United States
I tried creating a reddit account for this but you need karma points to post there. I just want someone to hear my story. I'm a 24 year old virgin that's never had a girlfriend. I started working right after high school and through saving and some smart investments I've managed to accumulate a net worth of over $300,000. However, I felt my low status job was part of the reason I was being rejected, so now I'm finally in college. I had to quit my job for school and now I'm watching my net worth plummet every month. I'm 6'5", in good shape, and don't think I'm that ugly. I'm not sure why I'm in this situation but if I had to guess it would be because my self esteem is damaged beyond repair from years of bullying in school, and the resulting social isolation has made me socially awkward. I remember as a child I was really outgoing and wasn't shy at all, it's like I'm a different person now. The odd times that I manage to get a girl to go out with me I only get 1 or 2 dates before they don't want to see me again. I'm starting to think I'm truly forever alone.
 
Fairy Lucretia

Fairy Lucretia

Well-known member
Forum Guide
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Apr 9, 2011
Messages
34,247
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Magical fairy wonderland xxxx
im 39 and just met my first boyfriend this year
im sure you will meet somebody special too ,you have loads of time
welcome love Lu xxx
 
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Helena1

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You say your self esteem is damaged beyond repair, so does that mean you have already done things to try and help it? Have you had therapy?
 
F

faloser

New member
Joined
Nov 19, 2019
Messages
2
Location
United States
You say your self esteem is damaged beyond repair, so does that mean you have already done things to try and help it? Have you had therapy?
Maybe beyond repair was a bit over dramatic. I haven't tried therapy, I don't think it will help. I'm trying to improve my life in general and am hoping that will help.
 
B

Butterflysj

Member
Joined
Nov 14, 2019
Messages
5
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Australia
You are only 24 and still finding yourself!
I really reccomend you try finding a good therapist and do some work on building your self esteem. Bullying is so tough, and unpacking those feelings with someone qualified will be hard but so worthwhile. I met my partner when I was 28, and I remember I always wished to have someone but honestly it works out in funny ways!
 
N

Natalie355

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Joined
Apr 2, 2019
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73
Location
Essex
I'm a 22 year old virgin and never had a boyfriend. It'll happen when you least expect it, I only went on my first date last year. :hug:
 
hicks

hicks

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Joined
May 14, 2019
Messages
1,503
Location
A galaxy, far far away..
Maybe beyond repair was a bit over dramatic. I haven't tried therapy, I don't think it will help. I'm trying to improve my life in general and am hoping that will help.
Don't be too quick to dismiss therapy. And by that I mean simply talking to someone about your issues. You've said you feel socially awkward. Why is that? And you mentioned the bullying that you suffered at school. That can be psychologically damaging, and at least will reduce your confidence.
And how did you meet these girls you went on dates with? Relationships work best starting from shared interests. What are your hobbies? Can you join any groups to make new friends, and possibly develop something into a relationship?
 
S

Shaulraj

New member
Joined
Nov 27, 2019
Messages
1
Location
Mauritius
I tried creating a reddit account for this but you need karma points to post there. I just want someone to hear my story. I'm a 24 year old virgin that's never had a girlfriend. I started working right after high school and through saving and some smart investments I've managed to accumulate a net worth of over $300,000. However, I felt my low status job was part of the reason I was being rejected, so now I'm finally in college. I had to quit my job for school and now I'm watching my net worth plummet every month. I'm 6'5", in good shape, and don't think I'm that ugly. I'm not sure why I'm in this situation but if I had to guess it would be because my self esteem is damaged beyond repair from years of bullying in school, and the resulting social isolation has made me socially awkward. I remember as a child I was really outgoing and wasn't shy at all, it's like I'm a different person now. The odd times that I manage to get a girl to go out with me I only get 1 or 2 dates before they don't want to see me again. I'm starting to think I'm truly forever alone.
Hi there buddy,
I feel what you are going though cause i've been there and i can offer you my mantra which helped me back then when i was in your situation. Just put some epic music that you really like and read this aloud as much as you need to. Be convinced about every word of it. Repeat it again and again. Here it is:

I completely trust myself. I trust my instincts. I trust my thoughts. I trust my feelings. I am the only person in this world who knows what is best for me. I love myself. I am full of mistakes but I love myself. I am aware of my failures, I am aware of the fact that I'm not perfect. I love myself with all the flaws, with all the mistakes I have done in the past. I respect myself, I trust in my abilities. I swear, I swear that I will keep working on myself. I will never stop improving and I will miss no chance to challenge myself, to improve myself.
I swear I will push my boundaries and go beyond my comfort zone. Every. Single. Day. I swear I will do whatever it takes to become a better man, to become
better with women, to become more successful, to become something bigger, something greater.
I am a great person because I make people happy. My aura is always positive and I am an optimist. I am sporty, smart, loving and ambitious, yet I am able to enjoy life and the beautiful planet earth with all its amazing little things that make me smile. I deserve a ten because I will always be a hard working, life enjoying, creative person, with whom it is always fun to hang out. I am full of surprises and people never get bored with me. I am the party, my life is awesome. It's always spontaneous and full of love. I am self amused and don't take myself too seriously.
I embrace every mistake I do and I am grateful for everything I do wrong, because these are the things from which I learn the most. If something needs to be redone: great. It's a new approach, a new chance to make it the way I want it.
I am not perfect. But neither is she. Neither is he. Nobody is perfect. Everybody has their problems. Everybody has their self-conscious moments.
I do not judge reality, I accept it. If she doesn't like me, that's fine, we're not there yet... Interesting information, interesting.
I don't care what other people think of me. I am the master of my life. I know what is best for me. I have the right to talk to ANY. PERSON. I want.
I love maintaining eye contact, it makes my heart race, a feeling that makes me feel alive. It's wonderful. It makes me feel alive and it's a challenge.
What would I do, if I weren't afraid?

That mantra was given to me by someone very special to me. It worked for me and i really think that it will work for you too. Feel free to adjust if needed and just believe in the process even when its so hard to and feel like quieting. Just have faith.
 
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