• Hi. It’s great to see you. Welcome!

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life. Amongst our membership there is a wealth of expertise that has been developed through having to deal with mental health issues.

    We are an actively moderated forum with a team of experienced moderators. We also have a specialist safety team that works extra hard to keep the forum safe for visitors and members.

    Register now to access many more features and forums!

Forced Responsibilties Weighs Me Down

B

BernieMc

Active member
Joined
Jun 7, 2016
Messages
33
Three or even four years ago my boss sent me home with a large dog who was suffering from stress and he knew I live in a quiet and peaceful home. That dog became best pals with my dog. You never see them more than a foot apart they are so close.

However I have a lot of responsibility at home that require a lot of cleaning because of all my pets. The thing is it has been 4 years since the guest dog has been here. My own dog stopped being super close to me once he paired up with his new dog buddy. If I could make one wish right now.... And get no negative repercussions from anyone- I would like to rehome both large dogs. Maybe I am just getting older but I find all the work involved is too much for me. My life at home is so busy I have no time to take care of myself properly. At nighttime when I get home from work lately I throw my coat on the floor in the kitchen and just lay on in my full work clothes until morning. I have a bedroom but sometimes with my depression I just want to lie down wherever. same with brushing my hair or other basic things- lately I just don't bother. I am on a variety of medications for depression and anxiety. If the extra burden of two large dogs being taken off my responsibilities I would feel content. But these are not toasters- they are living beings and I do feel bad for not wanting them here. I am just so weary and tired.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
10,197
Location
England
Hi,
It's a big decision to make rehoming your dogs, I'm sorry you're going through this. I hope you come to the right decision. You sound exhausted, have you had any blood tests lately just to check nothing else is happening??
I hope you get some decent rest very soon.
Take care
 
C

Cat Lady

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 23, 2015
Messages
73
I think sometimes you have to put yourself first and there is nothing wrong than considering whether you can actually cope with your dogs. x
 
B

BernieMc

Active member
Joined
Jun 7, 2016
Messages
33
Thank-you for your kind message. It feels good to have someone understand what a big decision it will be to rehome my dogs. I don't even have a desire to take care of my own personal care. I know I look bedraggled. Two co-workers mentioned to me how tired I look. I never looked in a mirror but they must be right. I work horrible hours. For the last 5 years I had Zero vacation time, zero sick days AND split shifts 6 days a week- sometimes 7. Maybe I is my GAD or maybe it is because I am a human - that these hours are too much for me.
 
B

BernieMc

Active member
Joined
Jun 7, 2016
Messages
33
Hi Cat Lady, thank-you for your kind words. I am in a terrible state of mind. My OCD is working against me it feels. I want every closet, cupboard, shelf, drawers- completely tidy and organized. I do 'spring cleaning' level of household chores daily. If I give up my dogs it will be extremely difficult but if they don't go I still need to chose something else to lessen my workload. I told my boyfriend a couple days ago and he said rehome the dogs and stop cleaning the apartment so much.
 
Top