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For the hosts in a D.I.D. system - how and when did your alters reveal themselves to you?

snowfreckled

snowfreckled

Member
Joined
Mar 14, 2019
Messages
12
Location
Serbia
Dear hosts,

I was wondering if some of you would like to share your stories on the following questions:

How and at what age did you first notice the presence and reality of your alters?

When did you make an attempt to communicate with an alter (in whatever way) for the first time and how? If an alter was the first to make a conscious attempt to reach you, how and when did it happen?

How do you communicate with your alters nowadays?

Also, what is your experience with an alter's passive influence?

Thank you. x
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2017
Messages
2,083
Location
USA
Hi there.I'm not a "host" and I no longer have DID(full integration and no longer fit the criteria for dx) but I will answer your questions.

I had no clue I had DID and when I was diagnosed I thought my therapist was 100% wrong.I didn't notice the presence and reality of alters until after quite a few years of therapy.I did know that I had another "presence" inside of me before ever starting therapy or being diagnosed but since DID begins at such an early age and it had always been like that I didn't understand/grasp that it was anything abnormal because it was my "normal"

My therapist had me attempt communication and it took a long time for it to even work.I made a "space" inside for communication that after years worked pretty well.

I don't communicate with alters nowadays because I don't have any now.

It took much therapy to even understand passive influence.But I did finally realize things like suddenly feeling extremely sad was due to a young part and other similar things.

How long have you been diagnosed?Are you in therapy?
 
R

Ridley

Member
Joined
Mar 16, 2019
Messages
11
Location
Fairbanks
Hello! The first time I noticed an alter was age 9. I heard her talking to me, but I also knew it was coming from inside my head. I kept this to myself for most of my life, just wanting to be considered “normal.” I never thought I had DID, but a form of schizophrenia or psychosis because that’s what my mom has. I experienced some trauma a few years ago, and another voice made itself known in my head. I still didn’t think of this as DID. Over the last year, I’ve really been forced to acknowledge it as I’ve been losing time and having a lot of amnesia and blackouts, and was diagnosed with DID. I have one alter i communicate with regularly and another that’s hard to reach. If I have more, I don’t know about them yet but I’m just starting therapy for it.
 
A

autumnbarch

New member
Joined
Sep 25, 2019
Messages
3
Location
North Charleston
I haven't been able to find a therapist to help me as I don't know where to start besides going and getting tests done at MUSC Psychiatry. However it's hard to get there because I don't have anyone who can watch my child. My husband works and we only have one car. In high school I did drugs but I only remember taking adderal, Xanax, and hydroxyzine. I'm missing a period of time in my life and I've had some friends fill me in on it but it all happened at school. Before this happened though I been sneaking out and it was a three day weekend where I worked constantly after being caught. My mom had actually left bruises that lasted for a week and she told me it was my fault she was beating me. Incidents like that had been happening since the 4th grade. There are times even now when I know I take are of my daughter and watch Netflix or play n my phone but it feels like a dream. Just recently I dropped my husband off at work and was on the way home when I got "lost". I knew how to get home and which turns to make and I know I thought that I needed to make it but I didn't get home until an hour later because for some reason I drove from downtown Charleston to the outside edge of goosecreek/north Charleston and I don't understand how I got there. I know where I turned but it seems like a dream that it happened.
 
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