• Hi. It’s great to see you. Welcome!

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life. Amongst our membership there is a wealth of expertise that has been developed through having to deal with mental health issues.

    We are an actively moderated forum with a team of experienced moderators. We also have a specialist safety team that works extra hard to keep the forum safe for visitors and members.

    Register now to access many more features and forums!

Fmla suicidal

J

Jacktherapper

Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2017
Messages
8
I've worked with my current employer for almost two years now. They are extremely reasonable, beyond reasonable they are really understanding great people.

I was recently diagnosed with BPD, I have been experiencing suicidal ideations, much more prominent than normal.

I spoke to the emergency room today, posing as a concerned family member. They told me suicidal patients are almost always admitted to inpatient care for 3-4 days at a minimum

I really feel like i need to go, but i don't want to risk my employment that would make matters 300× worse.

Can i request fmla, do i have to describe the issue to my employer or can it be at least somewhat confidential.
 
BorderlineDownunder

BorderlineDownunder

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 23, 2015
Messages
17,160
I've worked with my current employer for almost two years now. They are extremely reasonable, beyond reasonable they are really understanding great people.

I was recently diagnosed with BPD, I have been experiencing suicidal ideations, much more prominent than normal.

I spoke to the emergency room today, posing as a concerned family member. They told me suicidal patients are almost always admitted to inpatient care for 3-4 days at a minimum

I really feel like i need to go, but i don't want to risk my employment that would make matters 300× worse.

Can i request fmla, do i have to describe the issue to my employer or can it be at least somewhat confidential.
it should be 100% confidential, your health records are no ones business but you and your doctor.

They usually put "medical condition" on sick notes downunder.
 
J

Jacktherapper

Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2017
Messages
8
Thanks for the reply downunder, I'm really new to this.

If things don't improve in the next few days I'm going to have a private meeting with our hr person

I fear there is some stigma to what I'm experiencing, and I'm afraid it will permanently change the way my peers see me.
 
BorderlineDownunder

BorderlineDownunder

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 23, 2015
Messages
17,160
Thanks for the reply downunder, I'm really new to this.

If things don't improve in the next few days I'm going to have a private meeting with our hr person

I fear there is some stigma to what I'm experiencing, and I'm afraid it will permanently change the way my peers see me.
My advice: dont tell the HR person either. HR works for your employer not for you. If you've signed disclosure forms they can tell your boss.

Just say, I have a medical issue that needs some hospital time. Its illegal for them to even ask for details, down here.
 
J

Jacktherapper

Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2017
Messages
8
Thanks for the heads up, like i said I'm totally new to this.

Would I need to go to the doctor first or request fmla first

Sorry about all the questions I just really have no idea how this works, and would prefer to remain totally anonymous until I understand better.
 
Not_Crazy_Yet

Not_Crazy_Yet

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 19, 2015
Messages
3,489
Location
USA
I doubt you would need to request an FMLA leave. But it is true they must hold your position for at least 6 months while on FMLA leave. I had a family member in a similar situation. The only thing was her employer needed a note from the hospital. The hospital letterhead read XXXXXXX Behavioural Health Hospital. So keep in mind your note if required may indicate which hospital you were staying in.
 
J

Jacktherapper

Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2017
Messages
8
I doubt you would need to request an FMLA leave. But it is true they must hold your position for at least 6 months while on FMLA leave. I had a family member in a similar situation. The only thing was her employer needed a note from the hospital. The hospital letterhead read XXXXXXX Behavioural Health Hospital. So keep in mind your note if required may indicate which hospital you were staying in.
Yeah, if I'm eligible for Fmla for this type of issue I doubt I would get any kickback from my employer.

My boss worked previously at a behavioural health facility, and she knows something is going on with me, just not to what extent.

I don't really care if they know it's a mental issue, I really just don't want them to know it's suicidal.

Im afraid it would change the dynamic in a way that they would never really see me as a normal person again.
 
Not_Crazy_Yet

Not_Crazy_Yet

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 19, 2015
Messages
3,489
Location
USA
Yeah, if I'm eligible for Fmla for this type of issue I doubt I would get any kickback from my employer.

My boss worked previously at a behavioural health facility, and she knows something is going on with me, just not to what extent.

I don't really care if they know it's a mental issue, I really just don't want them to know it's suicidal.

Im afraid it would change the dynamic in a way that they would never really see me as a normal person again.
As far as I'm aware you can take an FMLA leave for ANY medical reason of yours or an immediate family member. I believe men can even take FMLA leave when their wife has a baby. But I doubt you'd need to. Your employer should allow you the few days as either unpaid sick time or paid sick time if you have any sick pay available. I had to take a medical leave after having surgery once and my employer paid me for my time off as I had sick time available as I rarely called in sick. Just let your employer know as soon as possible that you wont be coming in and will be in the hospital a few days so they can cover your shifts. Make sure you get a sick note from your doctor listing the dates you spent under their care. You should be fine.
 
Top