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first time psychosis=schizophrenia?

F

fiendishfiend

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Joined
Feb 16, 2015
Messages
3
hey guys, I'm new to these forums and just wanted your take on what im going through right now. So in the last 2 months ive had a decline in my cognitive abilities, im always disorganized in my head and in my behavior, causing a lot of anxiety. I cant seem to hold a regular conversation and have trouble dealing with life in general because of the social anxiety. My sleeping paterns have changed, i cant get deep sleep anymore so i stay in bed till late afternoon on some days, not wanting to deal with life. Now, i know that this constant brain fog is because of my drug use in the past months, but i still feel like i display early signs of schizophrenia. My doctor said it was impossible to tell from a small sample (past two months), in which i also took drugs (marijuana, mdma, cocaine, shrooms, alcool) but I wanted people who have dealth with it themselves to give me their thoughts. Now, this saturday i took about 1 gram of mushrooms, and my trip went alright till i went to bed. I had insane scary psychosis, i couldnt escape from the images in my head, it was a continual flow of images from hell, mountains of eyes, demons, etc. They would not subside, there was no escape. When i opened my eyes, it was no better, everything was menacing and wanted to get me, spikes and fangs, etc etc. I could stare away but the images would reform in different patterns. Combined with the voices, but mainly a powerful, autoritive voice which sensed my terror and wanted to take control of my mind. The entity that i attribute to this voice was exploring my very soul, building me up in its image, taking control. It gave me power, but only if i gave it my soul. Since i am sane, i know that all this wasnt truly happening, but the entity made me deconstruct the walls in my house with the power of my mind, which was a vivid as hell hallucination. As i did this, it laughed, because it showed me its power to make me lose my sanity. Then came the huge, dominant sounds, like some futuristic weapon being charged up, but it was just this entity, tuning my brain to its liking, taking control, transforming me from this weak, pathetic individual to its powerful warrior. As it did this, i saw myself in my minds eye being encapsulated in its huge, metal armor. It also messed with my face, forcing it to be even less expressive than it already is. Anyways, all this was terrifying and i begged to be released, just to go to sleep. This is all very insidious since this entity said it would return to get me in time. Even if a through this psychosis i was aware it was all fake, the hallucinations were more powerful than reality and there was truely no escape till exaustion took over and my body just shut down. I am laying off all the drugs, since i am sane sober but actually feel more and more unstable every come down or hangover. I still have all my mind in normal situations, even if i am a mess with my social anxiety and all. Everyone who has not done drugs tells me that is the problem, even the doc, they do not understand this is not normal reaction to a drug of anykind. With your experience with schizophrenia, i just wanted your guys opinion on this psychosis. Should
i read in to it that its an early
schizopreniac episode? Because i really feel that it was a schizophreniac type illusion, with the eyes and the goldlike voices and all. I dont usually feel schizophreniac, except in my last drug experiences or drinking too much, in which i very much felt this way. Sorry for the long read and no paragraphs, on my phone. Peace
 
*autumn*

*autumn*

ACCOUNT CLOSED
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here
Welcome to the forum fiendishfiend.
It seems like you have great imagination and have great insight into what's going on for you.
I am unable to provide any support with regards to psychosis or schizophrenia, only to mention that it is possible to have a predisposition to mental conditions without the use of drugs.
 
BillFish

BillFish

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 12, 2009
Messages
2,388
hey guys, I'm new to these forums and just wanted your take on what im going through right now. So in the last 2 months ive had a decline in my cognitive abilities, im always disorganized in my head and in my behavior, causing a lot of anxiety. I cant seem to hold a regular conversation and have trouble dealing with life in general because of the social anxiety. My sleeping paterns have changed, i cant get deep sleep anymore so i stay in bed till late afternoon on some days, not wanting to deal with life. Now, i know that this constant brain fog is because of my drug use in the past months, but i still feel like i display early signs of schizophrenia. My doctor said it was impossible to tell from a small sample (past two months), in which i also took drugs (marijuana, mdma, cocaine, shrooms, alcool) but I wanted people who have dealth with it themselves to give me their thoughts. Now, this saturday i took about 1 gram of mushrooms, and my trip went alright till i went to bed. I had insane scary psychosis, i couldnt escape from the images in my head, it was a continual flow of images from hell, mountains of eyes, demons, etc. They would not subside, there was no escape. When i opened my eyes, it was no better, everything was menacing and wanted to get me, spikes and fangs, etc etc. I could stare away but the images would reform in different patterns. Combined with the voices, but mainly a powerful, autoritive voice which sensed my terror and wanted to take control of my mind. The entity that i attribute to this voice was exploring my very soul, building me up in its image, taking control. It gave me power, but only if i gave it my soul. Since i am sane, i know that all this wasnt truly happening, but the entity made me deconstruct the walls in my house with the power of my mind, which was a vivid as hell hallucination. As i did this, it laughed, because it showed me its power to make me lose my sanity. Then came the huge, dominant sounds, like some futuristic weapon being charged up, but it was just this entity, tuning my brain to its liking, taking control, transforming me from this weak, pathetic individual to its powerful warrior. As it did this, i saw myself in my minds eye being encapsulated in its huge, metal armor. It also messed with my face, forcing it to be even less expressive than it already is. Anyways, all this was terrifying and i begged to be released, just to go to sleep. This is all very insidious since this entity said it would return to get me in time. Even if a through this psychosis i was aware it was all fake, the hallucinations were more powerful than reality and there was truely no escape till exaustion took over and my body just shut down. I am laying off all the drugs, since i am sane sober but actually feel more and more unstable every come down or hangover. I still have all my mind in normal situations, even if i am a mess with my social anxiety and all. Everyone who has not done drugs tells me that is the problem, even the doc, they do not understand this is not normal reaction to a drug of anykind. With your experience with schizophrenia, i just wanted your guys opinion on this psychosis. Should
i read in to it that its an early
schizopreniac episode? Because i really feel that it was a schizophreniac type illusion, with the eyes and the goldlike voices and all. I dont usually feel schizophreniac, except in my last drug experiences or drinking too much, in which i very much felt this way. Sorry for the long read and no paragraphs, on my phone. Peace
That's a lot of street drugs mate, why so much? Couldn't you just have had a toke on a joint every now and then at the weekend instead of doubling up on hallucinogenics etc. Maybe you need to identify the underlying reason why you did, because antipsychotics won't make it go away.:peace:
 
F

flatz

Guest
A pdoc may label it as organic (drug) psychosis, rather than schizophrenia.

Unlike schizophrenic psychosis You are able to distinguish hallucintaions from reality and can comprehend sentences very well.
 
Gajolene

Gajolene

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Joined
May 30, 2012
Messages
7,826
Location
small town Ontario, Canada
I sounds like a bad mushroom trip to me, I hope the effects don't linger too long for you, mushrooms did trigger my ex husbands disorder with manic bipolar, he had a family history of mental illness with psychosis however. Stay away from mushrooms, they are really, really dangerous. Hope these thoughts pass for you, and your focus and organizational abilities, do post and let us know how it goes for you.
 
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T

Topcat

Guest
My husband had a demon based drug psychosis back before we met. It kind of stayed with him after the initial event for maybe a week, and still believes that it was real (mystical but real), but is something he laughs about now.
He's never suffered any other psychosis since then, and doesn't have any serious mental health issues. So its not always a sure thing that these things trigger mh episodes.
But, go easy on the drugs perhaps? They won't do you any favours, especially if you're anxious before taking them because of fears around your mental health.
Take care
 
B

ballerina123

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 7, 2015
Messages
88
sound like drug induced psychosis to me which quite different to schizophrenia.
I would advice you to stop taking the drugs and see if the psychosis is still there. if so then ask to see a doctor
 
Observe

Observe

Member
Joined
Feb 2, 2015
Messages
21
Bro if you're schitzophrentic you won't know you're schitzophrentic
 
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F

fiendishfiend

New member
Joined
Feb 16, 2015
Messages
3
hey guys, thanks for the responses, just to update, I'm definitely not touching powerful psychoactive or psychedelic drugs anymore as i know i cant handle these anymore. I might smoke hash once in a while only if i feel confortable with it. So the last week and a half went allright, but during my sleep i usually feel uneasy, reality seems a bit less concrete. Last friday, I woke from an uneasy vivid dream and i did hallucinate small things: stuff running up and down the walls and objets blurring and reforming in front of my eyes. Nothing that was debilitating but still an unconfortable feeling. My imagination might be running wild but reality seems less "solid" when i am sleeping causing this uneasiness. These symptoms are pretty weird since schizophrenia seems out of the question. Possibly still after affects of drugs+imagination+anxiousness. But when my mind feels more week, i feel more prone to these slight hallucinations. Let me know what you guys think, thanks
 
Palladian

Palladian

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Feb 26, 2015
Messages
107
Location
Wales
I had a drugs psychosis after years of mixing LSD and XTC together. I felt everyone was conspiring against me especially my family. I was deeply paranoid and suffered from grandiose delusions. I was hearing voices and ultimately a danger to myself as I wasn't aware of who it was I was talking to and in the drugs scene strangers can be quite dangerous. Everything got worse when I stopped taking LSD and XTC together and started to try and have a normal life, I got into architectural history and stopped going raving and dancing. I was admitted to hospital when I was 23 after 8 years of continuos everyday drug abuse.
I think you're a lot more coherent than I was and I think one of the main indicators is that you were able to understand that none of the hallucinations were real. You say you feel a lot of social anxiety - is this paranoia?
Personally and this is something I've tried to do (unsuccessfully) is stay away from drugs. People say that weed is not a problem but I've found it triggers a psychotic reaction like flashbacks to trips for example. Anyway I won't go on to long or at least I hope I haven't. Good luck.
 
F

fiendishfiend

New member
Joined
Feb 16, 2015
Messages
3
yeah for me i have tried most drugs but only experementing never went overboard since i dont think i have addicted tendencies. I also think weed is what brought out a lot of paranoia, people tend to think its the ectasy that really fucked them up but im pretty sure weed creates a lot of the paranoia. It did the same thing for me a while back, getting flashbacks of visuals i had on acid a couple years back after smoking. Ive heard this actually happens to a lot of people. Anyways, im uneasy about this whole situation because Ive always used responsibly enough and never mixed hard drugs or went on benders. Its really seems to be a mental decline, where im showing all the negative symptoms of schizophrenia and shown some positive symptoms, albeit following drug use, without being delusionnal or psychotic. Unfortuenately, ive read that the negative symptoms can come along years before positive symptoms even appear (delusions, etc.) This is referred as "insidious schizophrenia".
 
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