"fine thanks" : vessel

write

write

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No, I'm not a "good listener" actually, I used to be, but that was before everything caught up with me, when I could care, be patient, try to help and even-wanted to.
When you, who I barely know, accost me in the street, in order to offload your troubles, at length, I do feel sad and concerned. But I cannot usefully advise, I cannot change anything, I cannot fix it all. I don't think I even care that much, as awful as that sounds. You knew me in a previous life, when I was a worker, someone it would be appropriate to seek help from. Even then, I was crap at it, but I could hide it better. I had patience and I could perform a role.

Now, I just feel used, drained, broken. Convenient. Ugh. I've been convenient to a few in my life. It is no achievement.

Maybe the exterior appears calm, kind... , it even smiles sometimes. But I am not, I am consumed by stuff that would make you run. I am overwhelmed by so much stuff that feels unspeakable. Not that I had chance to speak. I am vessel. I am fighting and numbing in turn, to avoid triggers that break my cover. I am glad that you could offload. I do hope it helped in some way. But you didn't find a "good listener", you found a broken vessel who cannot hold anymore.
 
claude

claude

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this is so eloquent and so sad write, my heart goes out to you. I do so hope you can find some proper relief and some happiness soon :hug:
 
G

Girl interupted

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And yet, just when we think we have reached our limit, we find we have more.

You have more. You are not broken.

You can write.

And that’s more than most can say.
 
AliceinWonderland

AliceinWonderland

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G

Girl interupted

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Was thinking of you tonight. Hope you’re ok.
 
write

write

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Thank you GI, you are kind xx
 
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