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Felling tired...frustrated and mis understood.

N

NorthernBC

Member
Joined
Jun 25, 2020
Messages
11
It will be my 2and Anniversary on Wednesday. It should be a time to celebrate. But it isn't. Sadly my husband and I have been "roommates" this past year. Literally no affection romance. We have been intimate 2 times once on our Anniversary list July and once in Feb. I am 51yrs and this is my 4th marriage. I was diagnosed 3 years ago.

My husband tells he pulled away from me because I wore him down. I am too needy and he doesn't feel I would ever be satisfied not matter what he did. He is right... I know I am needy and seek reassurance and validation. He works away from home alot and travels to different cities weekly. I get upset when he doesn't text or message me. He will go sometimes 7 hrs. This triggers me and I get filled with rage. I usually text him ... some horrible or nasty text. We fight and then I am up all night and have an awful day at work. It is a pattern that we have repeated for 4yrs.
I feel empty when he is gone, I knew he worked away when we first met. I love my husband... I hate who I become when he is away.
 
B

bpd2020

Well-known member
Joined
May 25, 2020
Messages
750
Location
England
Have you ever had any therapy? It sounds like not hearing from your husband triggers your abandonment and causes you to lash out. This is something that can be worked on in therapy. I can relate. I have bpd too and get lonely everytime my partner is not there.
 
U

Until

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 11, 2020
Messages
114
Location
uk
does he know you have BPD, does he know what BPD is?

Have you explained to him that you have abandonment issues but you want to work on it?
 
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