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feels like the old days without pot.. "can't" cope

M

mintdreamz

Member
Joined
Dec 27, 2019
Messages
17
Location
USA
Last night, I started taking my new prescription of sertraline after one day off. (total of 2 times before that).
This morning I woke up early around 6-something. It was getting lighter outside. I normally sleep later. I tried to fall back asleep, but couldn't.

Later on, (it's 9AM right now, so a bit before this..) I felt like I used to after getting out the hospital. Normally, I'd use weed and then a hospitalization would happen and when I got out, it's like I couldn't feel happy without the pot.

I also crave my vape of Nicotine. (i've not used nicotine in many months after quitting cold turkey because I worried over my health). I thought about CBD flower to get the feel of smoking satisfied, but I want to be able to pass a drug test should I try to work again. Plus, I can't afford it long-term.

So i'm talking about it instead.. like I did when I quit nicotine. I haven't smoked weed since 2015, but I never got over it.

I just want to feel better. I have an appt with a new psychiatrist in some weeks, and I plan on telling them about this. I also plan to tell the therapist i've been seeing next week at the therapy session.

I'm not sure if it's because I'm stopping the generic Welbutrin, which I was put on for quitting vaping..

I miss weed so much.
 
Ramson mash

Ramson mash

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Feb 1, 2019
Messages
5,813
Location
U.K
I miss weed so much.

I hear you. I am struggling immensly with regards to weed. I think the fact that you have 5 years without it, is admirable and i commend your strength for making this decision.

Try to Remember how far you have progressed, and the benefits it brings. And the burden which weed puts on your finances not to mention your goals and ambition.

I can only speak as someone who would like to be in your position in 5 years. Not because its an ideal position, or that i think i would be any happier. But that i would be able to give myself a chance at life and maybe see if i can reach some kind of potential, because with weed I feel i am content in my bubble, even full of love and joy, but without it, my life is bleak and my days are hell to get through.
At the same time my bubble stops me from reaching any kind of potential or acheiving anything productive or substancial.
It's been so long smoking weed i fear that i have not developed any type of skills which might help me provide for myself so my family suffers.
Anyhow would be glad to talk anytime with you, take care and try not to stress.
 
M

mintdreamz

Member
Joined
Dec 27, 2019
Messages
17
Location
USA
I hear you. I am struggling immensly with regards to weed. I think the fact that you have 5 years without it, is admirable and i commend your strength for making this decision.

Try to Remember how far you have progressed, and the benefits it brings. And the burden which weed puts on your finances not to mention your goals and ambition.

I can only speak as someone who would like to be in your position in 5 years. Not because its an ideal position, or that i think i would be any happier. But that i would be able to give myself a chance at life and maybe see if i can reach some kind of potential, because with weed I feel i am content in my bubble, even full of love and joy, but without it, my life is bleak and my days are hell to get through.
At the same time my bubble stops me from reaching any kind of potential or acheiving anything productive or substancial.
It's been so long smoking weed i fear that i have not developed any type of skills which might help me provide for myself so my family suffers.
Anyhow would be glad to talk anytime with you, take care and try not to stress.
Thank you for your kind message. It was kind of hard to come back to this thread.. I guess I felt some embarrassment with opening up so deep about pot. I'm happy I did it and I'm up for talking anytime too, thank you for being there.

After doing some thinking, I realized that this is the first time that I've stayed on my medication after all these years and didn't run back to cigs, vaping or using weed, when that feeling hit. So like you said, giving myself a chance to reach potential. I'm somewhere i've never been before.

It's hard.. I have nothing to do every day and i'm usually just laying in bed. My room is a mess.. using weed used to make me so happy that I would thoroughly clean it. Even the little bit of thc in some CBD I used some point of last year, had me cleaning it again. But I also didn't really sleep the night before so that could have been some mania.. I also had a RedBull the night before because the person who I was trying it off of, bought us one each. And it was my first time trying it.

Anyway.

I don't have the money to not run out of weed again, so yes, that is a plus. I was spending so much money off of a minimum wage job back then. I thought I was finding myself. Welp.

ps I looked into messaging you and it says you limit who can message, so I couldn't.

I will try not to stress. Also, I apologize for not getting back to you until now.
I will end this here and I hope to hear back from you.
 
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