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feeling suicidal

V

Viktoria

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How do I stop the thoughts and prevent myself from doing something that I may regret?
 
S

sarahe

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Hi Viktoria,

From experience, I tried and failed twice - the 2nd time I really meant it, it was unfortunate or fortunate, whichever way you want to look at it that I was found when I shouldn't have been by a dog walker.

I have found when I am feeling to the point of i don't want to be here anymore, I spend alot of time thinking about my family and how people that care about me would feel if they felt that they couldn't help me. I don't like the thought of others feeling helpless towards me or feeling like they could have done more/should have helped/should have noticed etc, those people have to live with that for the rest of their lives, it may not even be family. I used to work with a girl who did it quite recently, I hadn't been in touch with her for 5 years but she was friends with me on a social media site. I was devastated when she left this world because I felt like I could have noticed something. I hope she has made peace with her demons now.

Please don't think bad thoughts Viktoria, if you need anything please message me, we all need somebody at times. xx
 
prairiechick

prairiechick

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Viktoria, I am sorry you are feeling so badly right now. Please don't do anything to hurt yourself. Is there anything in particular that has made you feel this way right now?
 
RainbowHeartz

RainbowHeartz

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hi there please dont hurt yourself... perhaps keep talking on here and try and distract yourself :hug5:
 
D

Dottyone

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How do I stop the thoughts and prevent myself from doing something that I may regret?
Sorry your thinking bad at the moment Victoria, Destraction is the best way I find even if it talking on here or watching crap on youtube.

xx stay safe chicken
 
M

Madmitch

Guest
Hi Viktoria,

best way I've found to help stop thinking the bad thoughts is to... try and distract yourself, by doing ANY task. Try and go for a walk (weather permitting), or speak to someone that makes you happy or makes you feel good about yourself.

Hurting yourself isn't the answer. Yes, you may die (but, you may not, and that it's self brings lower self worth/unhappiness) and perhaps in 'this' moment that would be good for you. What about those that love you dearly? You may not think that they care? But, I believe they would, and at the very least they may like the chance to help, if you let them or spoke to them?

I can empathise with similar feelings that you are going through, the pain you're going through I am VERY sure is unbearable. Perhaps if you have the time and before you do, do anything that you may regret, perhaps you can read my post 'Hope' in the BPD Forum?

Best wishes, please be safe.

Madmitch
 
V

Viktoria

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Thanks for all your kind replies. I don't think anything has triggered it, I just feel really anxious. I'm home alone at the minute and it feels so easy to do something stupid. My dad will be back any minute though. I hope I can just get an early night and then tomorrow I have an appointment with my doc, who regretfully I find very unhelpful and apathetic. But at least it's something. I hope I can hold on til then.
 
S

sarahe

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Thanks for all your kind replies. I don't think anything has triggered it, I just feel really anxious. I'm home alone at the minute and it feels so easy to do something stupid. My dad will be back any minute though. I hope I can just get an early night and then tomorrow I have an appointment with my doc, who regretfully I find very unhelpful and apathetic. But at least it's something. I hope I can hold on til then.
I too with my own doctor Viktoria, i have in the past felt like I may as well be talking to his computer screen for all the attention they pay me. If I had a quid for every time i'd been told to keep a diary or "See how you feel in a fortnight", i'd be somewhat richer. Hang in there my lovely, your Father probably needs you as much as you need him right now. You're not alone, ever.
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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Hey Viktoria, been wondering how you're getting on as i've not seen you post much of late.
I'm sorry to hear you're having these thoughts. I hope you are getting a good night's rest, and i'll keep my fingers crossed that you get some decent support when you see the doctor tomorrow.

In the meantime, sending hugs your way and hoping you start to feel better soon.:hug1:
 
V

Viktoria

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Thank you both. My doctor called in sick so I won't see her until next week now. I don't mind that much, she's not that helpful. I'm on my way home to my boyfriend now, it's a long journey by train which I'm not too fond of but I think I'll be okay. I survived yesterday without doing anything rash so I must have some strength in me.
 
V

Viktoria

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My boyfriend has just broken up with me after five years. I just want to die right now.
 

MarlieeB

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I'm so sorry that he has broken up with you :( hopefully he will see the error of his ways.

Where are you at the moment?

Please try your best to stay safe.

Marliee x
 
V

Viktoria

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I'm at his parents waiting for my dad to pick me up. I don't know if I can stay safe, life is pointless without him.
 
prairiechick

prairiechick

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Oh no! That is absolutely the worst news you could get right now. I am so sorry you are going through this right now. But please, please don't do anything to harm yourself. Please just keep posting on here as much as you need to and we will all help you get through this difficult time. Your life is worthwhile. You are a worthwhile person. Please allow yourself the time you need to grieve your loss. I know this must be especially hard with Christmas just around the corner. Sending you loads of hugs.
 

MarlieeB

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I agree with what PC said.

I'm glad you will be with your Dad. Hopefully having him around will keep you a little safe.

As PC said, keep talking on here.

X
 
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