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Feeling Lonely (just venting)

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Snowshoes68

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 30, 2019
Messages
86
Location
USA
I have friends who know I've tried to kill myself but they never check in on me. I've told some right after failed attempts but they never ask how I'm doing.

My friend told me that no one will check in on me.

I don't know why. I just assume they don't care.

So I don't worry much about them if I try to kill myself because if it bothers them then maybe they'd ask how I'm doing once in a while.

Also I was struggling with FOMO and being exhausted and my friend told me that no one cares if I'm there or not so I should just stay home. They meant to be helpful but that line has stayed with me.
 
Foxjo

Foxjo

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 2, 2012
Messages
7,470
Location
Teesside
I think you need different friends in my opinion.
You do not need toxic friends in your life. Its taken me years to figure that one out and some time to come to terms with it. You can run around after people who will not do the same for you, its only putting more stress on your mental health.
Is that something you can think about?
Hugs
Fox
 
Jimh

Jimh

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 10, 2019
Messages
123
Location
south wales, uk
It's very hard for people to talk about issues they don't feel comfortable with which is more likely why they don't ask how you are doing. A number of my friends are the same and know the issues I have but don't ask how I am, I actually prefer this as I'd rather they knew me for the other aspects of my personality rather than my issues. They are however supportive the few times I've opened up and are there for me when needed, hopefully your friends are the same.

I think your friend was trying to be helpful but its very easy to say the wrong thing, especially when talking about something you don't really understand.
 
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EstherRose94

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 2, 2019
Messages
2,893
Location
USA
I have friends who know I've tried to kill myself but they never check in on me. I've told some right after failed attempts but they never ask how I'm doing.

My friend told me that no one will check in on me.

I don't know why. I just assume they don't care.

So I don't worry much about them if I try to kill myself because if it bothers them then maybe they'd ask how I'm doing once in a while.

Also I was struggling with FOMO and being exhausted and my friend told me that no one cares if I'm there or not so I should just stay home. They meant to be helpful but that line has stayed with me.
i think in that last part they were attempting to take pressure off you so you weren’t worrying. I’m not saying I wouldn’t have been hurt too especially if already upset and tired. But try not to think they meant they didn’t want you there. At the same time you deserve people who understand you and are sweet when you need them to be! They’re not evil but they might also not be meeting your needs in the best way. I think the best thing you can do is practice self care and also maybe widen your circle ❤
 
A

Albawolf

Guest
I have friends who know I've tried to kill myself but they never check in on me. I've told some right after failed attempts but they never ask how I'm doing.

My friend told me that no one will check in on me.

I don't know why. I just assume they don't care.

So I don't worry much about them if I try to kill myself because if it bothers them then maybe they'd ask how I'm doing once in a while.

Also I was struggling with FOMO and being exhausted and my friend told me that no one cares if I'm there or not so I should just stay home. They meant to be helpful but that line has stayed with me.
Real friends never leave you. Difficult times reveal who your true friends are.

You are better off without them .

You are amazing you will meet people just like you.

When i was diagnosed with depression one of my university friends i considered a close friend dismissed my depression altogther saying it was not real and should go out more.
After my exams and gradaution this friend stopped talking to me. After all the support i had given them at uni they could not be there for me.
 
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Snowshoes68

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 30, 2019
Messages
86
Location
USA
I think you need different friends in my opinion.
You do not need toxic friends in your life. Its taken me years to figure that one out and some time to come to terms with it. You can run around after people who will not do the same for you, its only putting more stress on your mental health.
Is that something you can think about?
Hugs
Fox
Thank you. I've been trying to meet new people and ultimately I am trying to move to a new country so I am away from the people and don't have to worry if they're my friends or not
 
S

Snowshoes68

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 30, 2019
Messages
86
Location
USA
It's very hard for people to talk about issues they don't feel comfortable with which is more likely why they don't ask how you are doing. A number of my friends are the same and know the issues I have but don't ask how I am, I actually prefer this as I'd rather they knew me for the other aspects of my personality rather than my issues. They are however supportive the few times I've opened up and are there for me when needed, hopefully your friends are the same.

I think your friend was trying to be helpful but its very easy to say the wrong thing, especially when talking about something you don't really understand.
Thank you for the other perspective. I've never thought about it like wanting people to see the other aspects. I think I my head I'm nothing but my issues and they define me so I've never thought of it that way
 
S

Snowshoes68

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 30, 2019
Messages
86
Location
USA
Real friends never leave you. Difficult times reveal who your true friends are.

You are better off without them .

You are amazing you will meet people just like you.

When i was diagnosed with depression one of my university friends i considered a close friend dismissed my depression altogther saying it was not real and should go out more.
After my exams and gradaution this friend stopped talking to me. After all the support i had given them at uni they could not be there for me.
I'm sorry that happened to you. I don't really understand why people can be like that. I think that if I found out that someone was struggling, I'd want to support them more.
 
S

Snowshoes68

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 30, 2019
Messages
86
Location
USA
i think in that last part they were attempting to take pressure off you so you weren’t worrying. I’m not saying I wouldn’t have been hurt too especially if already upset and tired. But try not to think they meant they didn’t want you there. At the same time you deserve people who understand you and are sweet when you need them to be! They’re not evil but they might also not be meeting your needs in the best way. I think the best thing you can do is practice self care and also maybe widen your circle ❤
Thank you for understanding so much. I like the "not meeting your needs in the best way." It's hard for me not to see just black and white and this is a nice perspective where it's maybe no one's fault.
 
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EstherRose94

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 2, 2019
Messages
2,893
Location
USA
Thank you for understanding so much. I like the "not meeting your needs in the best way." It's hard for me not to see just black and white and this is a nice perspective where it's maybe no one's fault.
I do that too!
 
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