F
FlowerPainting
Guest
Hi
I have googled my problem of guilt feelings, but didn't seem to find anything that described how I feel. So I searched for a forum that I thought would be a safe space and wondered if I could post my problem here.
I have guilty feelings around children, meaning that I find it really difficult to connect with children and feel normal around them because I feel guilty about sexual abuse of children. I haven't been abused myself and have never entertained even the remotest thought in my life about abusing a child. So I don't know why I find it so hard.
I think I get it from my father who is very timid around kids and won't hardly look at a child for what seem to be similar guilt issues. It's like he's scared that if he looks at a child, he will be labelled a pedophile, and I feel like that too.
It's very frustrating because I am now in a public sector job that entails contacting schools and pupils and I feel so awkward speaking about children. I recently asked my manager if I could take a pupil into a meeting that I thought would be a good learning opportunity for the pupil, and my manager said that she didn't feel comfortable about that. This gives me the idea that my uncomfortable feelings are coming across to others and making them feel awkward too.
I'm fed up of having this weight on my shoulders every day when I am just a normal person. Is there anything I can do?
Thanks.
I have googled my problem of guilt feelings, but didn't seem to find anything that described how I feel. So I searched for a forum that I thought would be a safe space and wondered if I could post my problem here.
I have guilty feelings around children, meaning that I find it really difficult to connect with children and feel normal around them because I feel guilty about sexual abuse of children. I haven't been abused myself and have never entertained even the remotest thought in my life about abusing a child. So I don't know why I find it so hard.
I think I get it from my father who is very timid around kids and won't hardly look at a child for what seem to be similar guilt issues. It's like he's scared that if he looks at a child, he will be labelled a pedophile, and I feel like that too.
It's very frustrating because I am now in a public sector job that entails contacting schools and pupils and I feel so awkward speaking about children. I recently asked my manager if I could take a pupil into a meeting that I thought would be a good learning opportunity for the pupil, and my manager said that she didn't feel comfortable about that. This gives me the idea that my uncomfortable feelings are coming across to others and making them feel awkward too.
I'm fed up of having this weight on my shoulders every day when I am just a normal person. Is there anything I can do?
Thanks.