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Feeling depressed and confused and I dont know why.

Carol1952

Carol1952

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Joined
Apr 8, 2020
Messages
950
Location
New England
I am so depressed again for the second day I dont know why maybe it is because next Wed it would have been 16 years since my husband passed away and I am missing my mom.I dont know confused to and I just feel out of whack.Like I dont belong here.So I have been just laying down all day.Watching Xena .I am afraid to be alone.I dont understand that either. I just feel so messed up.I have a doctors appointment on Sept 15 and when I spoke to my shrink the other day he said he doesnt know if it will be in his office .I dont think so I dont want to leave my house to scared and because of this virus too.
 
L

LokiPokey75

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Joined
Apr 1, 2020
Messages
515
Location
United States
Hi Carol1952!

This is a terrible spot to be in. I'm so sorry that you're suffering right now. 😞

I can't begin to imagine the grief you're experiencing. I've never been in a relationship, so maybe I have no right to say anything at all. But there are two questions I think it'd be good for you to explore.

1.) Would your husband want you to be happy and move on?
2.) Do you want to be happy and move on?

I'm no psychiatrist. I just want you to identity what you really want and what's holding you back. If I lost my husband, I don't think I'd want to live either. But I'd be forced to live. And maybe that would push me to one day finally want to live again. Maybe it will for you too.

As for the fear of the virus, as long as you take the necessary precautions like wearing your mask and washing your hands, it's okay to go out. I think it's healthier for you to get out of the house right now and talk to someone rather than sit in your house ruminating. I'd be scared too, but I'd just be glad to have someone who will listen to me and comfort me when I'm down.

I'll pray for you Carol and hope that you find the strength to move forward and not remain stagnant. Your happiness is not selfish; it's what you deserve.

Good luck and stay safe!
 
K

karl7

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Joined
Jul 9, 2013
Messages
571
I am so depressed again for the second day I dont know why maybe it is because next Wed it would have been 16 years since my husband passed away and I am missing my mom.I dont know confused to and I just feel out of whack.Like I dont belong here.So I have been just laying down all day.Watching Xena .I am afraid to be alone.I dont understand that either. I just feel so messed up.I have a doctors appointment on Sept 15 and when I spoke to my shrink the other day he said he doesnt know if it will be in his office .I dont think so I dont want to leave my house to scared and because of this virus too.
firstly sorry to hear your husband passed away......i know from experience how tough depression can be......ive been through it myself and know how bad it can be.....but i know when i was depressed i would have liked someone to reassure me that depression does pass......you will get betrer......it just takes time, try tpo take it easy as much as you can.....i hope thing s improve for you soon.
 
Carol1952

Carol1952

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 8, 2020
Messages
950
Location
New England
Hi Carol1952!

This is a terrible spot to be in. I'm so sorry that you're suffering right now. 😞

I can't begin to imagine the grief you're experiencing. I've never been in a relationship, so maybe I have no right to say anything at all. But there are two questions I think it'd be good for you to explore.

1.) Would your husband want you to be happy and move on?
2.) Do you want to be happy and move on?

I'm no psychiatrist. I just want you to identity what you really want and what's holding you back. If I lost my husband, I don't think I'd want to live either. But I'd be forced to live. And maybe that would push me to one day finally want to live again. Maybe it will for you too.

As for the fear of the virus, as long as you take the necessary precautions like wearing your mask and washing your hands, it's okay to go out. I think it's healthier for you to get out of the house right now and talk to someone rather than sit in your house ruminating. I'd be scared too, but I'd just be glad to have someone who will listen to me and comfort me when I'm down.

I'll pray for you Carol and hope that you find the strength to move forward and not remain stagnant. Your happiness is not selfish; it's what you deserve.

Good luck and stay safe!
My husband an di use to talk about u would go first and i would tell him it would have to be me.It was just awful he died right in front of me.My mom was so very sick she waas 91 and didnt want to talk to anyone before she died.My dad had passed two years before she did.I just feel so lonely. I dont go out because I have agoraphobia really bad.
 
Carol1952

Carol1952

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 8, 2020
Messages
950
Location
New England
firstly sorry to hear your husband passed away......i know from experience how tough depression can be......ive been through it myself and know how bad it can be.....but i know when i was depressed i would have liked someone to reassure me that depression does pass......you will get betrer......it just takes time, try tpo take it easy as much as you can.....i hope thing s improve for you soon.
thanku
 
Hillman hunter

Hillman hunter

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Joined
Oct 26, 2019
Messages
3,837
Location
West Midlands , England
I am so depressed again for the second day I dont know why maybe it is because next Wed it would have been 16 years since my husband passed away and I am missing my mom.I dont know confused to and I just feel out of whack.Like I dont belong here.So I have been just laying down all day.Watching Xena .I am afraid to be alone.I dont understand that either. I just feel so messed up.I have a doctors appointment on Sept 15 and when I spoke to my shrink the other day he said he doesnt know if it will be in his office .I dont think so I dont want to leave my house to scared and because of this virus too.
hi carol, how are you today. i do hope your feeling better,

take care 🐱 🐰 i have a bunny rabbit as well, called emily rose
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Jan 4, 2013
Messages
14,465
Location
England
Hi Carol,
Sorry for your loss, hope your feeling better today.
Hugs
 
Carol1952

Carol1952

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 8, 2020
Messages
950
Location
New England
firstly sorry to hear your husband passed away......i know from experience how tough depression can be......ive been through it myself and know how bad it can be.....but i know when i was depressed i would have liked someone to reassure me that depression does pass......you will get betrer......it just takes time, try tpo take it easy as much as you can.....i hope thing s improve for you soon.
thanku
hi carol, how are you today. i do hope your feeling better,

take care 🐱 🐰 i have a bunny rabbit as well, called emily rose
I had a breakdown for about ten minutes I just dont know what happened I started crying and yelling not loud though what the hell is wrong with me dont know why this happens then as soon as it started it ended about ten minutes later.I dont like being alone ,i feel afraid.I had a rabbit one year my parents gave it to us for Easter my brother called him Little Rab but they made us take him back after Easter.
 
Hillman hunter

Hillman hunter

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Joined
Oct 26, 2019
Messages
3,837
Location
West Midlands , England
thanku

I had a breakdown for about ten minutes I just dont know what happened I started crying and yelling not loud though what the hell is wrong with me dont know why this happens then as soon as it started it ended about ten minutes later.I dont like being alone ,i feel afraid.I had a rabbit one year my parents gave it to us for Easter my brother called him Little Rab but they made us take him back after Easter.
hi carol. im really sorry your feeling like this, its scary when this happens to us, i get like this as well, its frustration, it has to come out some how, with tears or shouting.
how do you feel right now,
please take care of yourself, write soon,
 
Carol1952

Carol1952

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 8, 2020
Messages
950
Location
New England
Hi Carol,
Sorry for your loss, hope your feeling better today.
Hugs
Thank you.It gets really bad at times HOw about you?
hi carol. im really sorry your feeling like this, its scary when this happens to us, i get like this as well, its frustration, it has to come out some how, with tears or shouting.
how do you feel right now,
please take care of yourself, write soon,
Hi I am in a DEEP depression I got up around 7am and i got up and took a nap un til fater 12:30 this morning.I am missing my husband mom and dad.It will be 16 years come this Wed since my husband past and yet I still cannot get over it.I guess it is because I saw him die.Took his last breath it was just awful
 
Hillman hunter

Hillman hunter

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 26, 2019
Messages
3,837
Location
West Midlands , England
Thank you.It gets really bad at times HOw about you?

Hi I am in a DEEP depression I got up around 7am and i got up and took a nap un til fater 12:30 this morning.I am missing my husband mom and dad.It will be 16 years come this Wed since my husband past and yet I still cannot get over it.I guess it is because I saw him die.Took his last breath it was just awful
hello, im really sorry your feeling so depressed , thats really traumatic you saw your husband pass, the worst thing ever for you to see , it must feel really painful coming up to the day your husband passed,

, it broke my heart when my dad went, i loved him dearly,

is your friend coming again soon, can you talk to her about how you feel,you need to talk to somebody about how your feeling,

please take care carol
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
14,465
Location
England
Hi Carol,
I'm sorry your in a deep depression, I have suffered on and off over the years.
My dad died in Jan 2019 I'm still in shock etc.
Thank you ever so much for asking.
Depression is horrible, but I believe we can get better with the right care.
Hugs
 
Carol1952

Carol1952

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 8, 2020
Messages
950
Location
New England
hello, im really sorry your feeling so depressed , thats really traumatic you saw your husband pass, the worst thing ever for you to see , it must feel really painful coming up to the day your husband passed,

, it broke my heart when my dad went, i loved him dearly,

is your friend coming again soon, can you talk to her about how you feel,you need to talk to somebody about how your feeling,

please take care carol
She wont be coming until Monday.I got one of my post editedI am very depressed i have been crying all day and yelling to.I been sleeping all day long.I have nobody around here to talk to.I am jsut sick of everything.i just completed a half hour survey and i got nothing for it.How are you doing?
 
Carol1952

Carol1952

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 8, 2020
Messages
950
Location
New England
Hi Carol,
I'm sorry your in a deep depression, I have suffered on and off over the years.
My dad died in Jan 2019 I'm still in shock etc.
Thank you ever so much for asking.
Depression is horrible, but I believe we can get better with the right care.
Hugs
Thank you it also causes me to yell and cry.I have been sleeping all day long.Nobody is going to come and see me anyway.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
14,465
Location
England
Hi Carol,
I did that slept all day, however then I started getting into a little routine.
It's help to do a little each day, then you feel you've done something.
I'm sorry your lonely, I hope the forum helps.
Hugs
 
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