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Feeling 'alien' - like I don't belong here

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Lizardqueen

Active member
Joined
Aug 9, 2018
Messages
31
All my life I've felt different from other people. Like I don't belong here and like I never fit in with any type of group of people, except perhaps those who are a bit chaotic or crazy like me! Does anyone else feel like this and is this just part of BPD? I'm getting tired of it now and it makes me feel like I just want to die
 
isthereafix

isthereafix

Member
Joined
Oct 21, 2019
Messages
11
Location
Kansas
It’s completely the BPD don’t give up, sweet thing. I feel the same. All of my life I’ve tried to win people over with gifts and whatnot. When they ever so slightly acted differently than I expected them to I start getting REALLY paranoid like they don’t actually like me. They use me. They hate me. They’re plotting on me. It builds out of nothing. Maybe they didn’t laugh at my extremely hard to read sarcasm. I don’t make it easy for people to interact with me because I like the ones that make it through the tests. Turns out they’re nutty like me. :)) it’s ok to be how you are. Now if it’s inhibiting you from daily life maybe look into some professional help/therapy to teach yourself coping skills. I’m not certain but I think there is a possibility to rewire your brain with intensive cbt, which can give lasting results from what I’ve read.
Don’t give up dude it’s so exciting to meet people that are like you. It’s SO exciting. Like I could scream right now it’s that exciting. Not being alone in your “crazy” tendencies REALLY helps you calm down and sit back so you can try to further evaluate yourself!!
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
4,814
Location
Nowhere
yes I went to therapy today
and I realise that I dont feel human, that I feel like a wolf or something
I have not been allowed to express my feelings and thoughts
because they are seen as insane or negative
and they build up and turn me into something

I came out of the therapy room
feeling more human today

I have seen this therapist for about 4 years now
and I'm only just realising how good she is
 
isthereafix

isthereafix

Member
Joined
Oct 21, 2019
Messages
11
Location
Kansas
THIS MAKES MY HEART SWELL AND IM GRINNING FROM EAR TO EAR!!! I’m so happy that you are feeling some relief after such a long hiatus! Yaeeeyyy ❤ Keep going man. I’m envious! I can’t wait to get back into therapy.
 
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Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
4,814
Location
Nowhere
its been a long hard fight for therapy 💜 💜💜
 
J

Jules5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2019
Messages
1,787
Location
Florida
It’s completely the BPD don’t give up, sweet thing. I feel the same. All of my life I’ve tried to win people over with gifts and whatnot. When they ever so slightly acted differently than I expected them to I start getting REALLY paranoid like they don’t actually like me. They use me. They hate me. They’re plotting on me. It builds out of nothing. Maybe they didn’t laugh at my extremely hard to read sarcasm. I don’t make it easy for people to interact with me because I like the ones that make it through the tests. Turns out they’re nutty like me. :)) it’s ok to be how you are. Now if it’s inhibiting you from daily life maybe look into some professional help/therapy to teach yourself coping skills. I’m not certain but I think there is a possibility to rewire your brain with intensive cbt, which can give lasting results from what I’ve read.
Don’t give up dude it’s so exciting to meet people that are like you. It’s SO exciting. Like I could scream right now it’s that exciting. Not being alone in your “crazy” tendencies REALLY helps you calm down and sit back so you can try to further evaluate yourself!!
You made me smile isthereafix when you said you like to hang out with nuts like you. When I was stronger in the head I always said you have to hang out with your own kind. You made me remember Thank you. Yes I have test to for people. I will not let any one get close unless I feel alright with them. Lots of hugs Jules
 
J

Jules5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2019
Messages
1,787
Location
Florida
All my life I've felt different from other people. Like I don't belong here and like I never fit in with any type of group of people, except perhaps those who are a bit chaotic or crazy like me! Does anyone else feel like this and is this just part of BPD? I'm getting tired of it now and it makes me feel like I just want to die
Lizardqueen you have to hang out with people like you. I use to love being with my family but my mental health changed all that. My family is normal and I am not. I ran into people sometimes at the store and they seem just like me and I get to smile for a while. Please not feel like an alien. You have me and the forum. I am nutty than a fruit cake-we can hang anytime you feel like it. YOU ARE NOT ALONE! I believe in aliens anyways we should get along great. Lots of hugs Jules
 
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Lizardqueen

Active member
Joined
Aug 9, 2018
Messages
31
Lizardqueen you have to hang out with people like you. I use to love being with my family but my mental health changed all that. My family is normal and I am not. I ran into people sometimes at the store and they seem just like me and I get to smile for a while. Please not feel like an alien. You have me and the forum. I am nutty than a fruit cake-we can hang anytime you feel like it. YOU ARE NOT ALONE! I believe in aliens anyways we should get along great. Lots of hugs Jules
Thank you for such a warm and positive reply :) It made me smile when I'm feeling so low - which is often unheard of! There are no support groups for people with BPD in Glasgow, Scotland where I live so I find that tough. A lot of the people I know spent most of their time in the loos taking cocaine and I don't take drugs so perhaps that's one of the reasons I feel alien..
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
1,078
Location
Norfolk
yes I went to therapy today
and I realise that I dont feel human, that I feel like a wolf or something
I have not been allowed to express my feelings and thoughts
because they are seen as insane or negative
and they build up and turn me into something

I came out of the therapy room
feeling more human today

I have seen this therapist for about 4 years now
and I'm only just realising how good she is
Well done, you should be very proud of yourself. It’s a huge step forward 👌
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
1,078
Location
Norfolk
All my life I've felt different from other people. Like I don't belong here and like I never fit in with any type of group of people, except perhaps those who are a bit chaotic or crazy like me! Does anyone else feel like this and is this just part of BPD? I'm getting tired of it now and it makes me feel like I just want to die
Please realise everyone with BPD feels exactly the same. The reason is simple, we only live at the extreme end of the emotional spectrums so are constantly in either hyper or hypo mode (see attached). We are usually disappointed that people are not as excited as we are, or indeed that nobody understands our level of suffering.
Be aware though that BPD is not a life sentence. You can learn to control your emotions. A Psychologist teaching you DBT (Dialectical Behavioural Therapy) is the best treatment but you can learn a lot from self help books off the Internet.
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
1,078
Location
Norfolk
thankyou Lunus

it feels amazing !
Never be afraid to be totally honest and to let out your emotions in therapy. It’s the best and safest place. x
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
1,078
Location
Norfolk
Please realise everyone with BPD feels exactly the same. The reason is simple, we only live at the extreme end of the emotional spectrums so are constantly in either hyper or hypo mode (see attached). We are usually disappointed that people are not as excited as we are, or indeed that nobody understands our level of suffering.
Be aware though that BPD is not a life sentence. You can learn to control your emotions. A Psychologist teaching you DBT (Dialectical Behavioural Therapy) is the best treatment but you can learn a lot from self help books off the Internet.
 

Attachments

Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
4,814
Location
Nowhere
Never be afraid to be totally honest and to let out your emotions in therapy. It’s the best and safest place. x
thanks Lunus
actually I have had to learn to be careful
I have met some really weird therapists
that are too analytical and not very grounded
and some are even more weird , and not in a good way

using forums like this and other support circles really helps
because if you are learning to trust someone
you might need the fellowship of other members
in case something worries you about your therapist
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
1,078
Location
Norfolk
thanks Lunus
actually I have had to learn to be careful
I have met some really weird therapists
that are too analytical and not very grounded
and some are even more weird , and not in a good way

using forums like this and other support circles really helps
because if you are learning to trust someone
you might need the fellowship of other members
in case something worries you about your therapist
Fair point. I for one will always be here for you. 🤗
 
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