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Feel so sad when boyfriend leaves!

FYYS

FYYS

New member
Joined
Jul 11, 2021
Messages
1
Location
USA
I experience the same thing and I don't really want to tell him about it and try to avoid this feeling. I still remember the time when he seemed really annoyed and told me to stop making him feel guilty to leave by acting so sad and he hates it. Then I stop shows this sadness and try to suck it up or avoid my feelings. I'm glad that I'm not alone to feel this way tho.
(p/s: we've dated for more than 7 months already)
 
R

r113yj4d3

New member
Joined
Jul 13, 2021
Messages
1
Location
Rhode Island
I experience the same thing and I don't really want to tell him about it and try to avoid this feeling. I still remember the time when he seemed really annoyed and told me to stop making him feel guilty to leave by acting so sad and he hates it. Then I stop shows this sadness and try to suck it up or avoid my feelings. I'm glad that I'm not alone to feel this way tho.
(p/s: we've dated for more than 7 months already)

same:( i hate feeling like this but don’t want to always talk about it with him because i don’t want him to feel guilty or trapped or end up resenting me at some point. we spend every day togetehr and recently he started a new job and i’ll only be able to see him once a week. and it sucks so bad. before i left his house tonight we hugged eachother so tight and i was holding back tears. and when i left got back in my car i just broke down crying. i have a very anxious attachment style, abandonment issues, u name it. i feel so empty without him. and i always end up thinking when i’m not with him that he doesn’t love me or want to be with me. it’s sucks:(
 
A

aVeryLovedGirl

New member
Joined
Aug 4, 2021
Messages
1
Location
USA
I also feel this way whenever my long distance girlfriend and I have to be apart. We have been together a year now and every time I cry so badly and it honestly feels to have just gotten worse over our time together.

We see eachother usually about twice a month or sometimes more since she's 2 hours away, a lot of the time its me having to leave her house. I cry so bad every time. Like, snot nosed crying and even my chest starts to ache. I feel so stupid every single time, but im so incredibly lucky to have such an understanding and amazing girl to be my rock to lean on.

She just hugs me close and gives me her sweet smiles and kisses every time. Her patience with my dramatics is astounding. Normally the sadness leeches into the drive home, and although I am still sad, I do move on and just await until we meet again.
I've definitely frustrated myself and been mad at myself for acting this way, because it is pretty embarrassing for me, but its a feeling I seem to have no control over once it starts. Im thinking that it has to link to my childhood in some way but im honestly not certain. (For reference, I am 26 and female)

We have talked some about it, and she has let me know that its okay to feel this way. Emotions are meant to be felt and not to feel bad about it. She loves me regardless and is here for me.
Her support helps me so much. There really isn't much she can do in the moment but her being there for me, keeping me close and secure while she can, and trying to cheer me up is so much more than I could ever ask for.

At times I worry, because she handles it so well and doesn't seem to be so sad, maybe she is (I've never really asked fully how she feels in those moments she comforts me) but im sure it wouldn't be any good if the both of us were in shambles. I think I cry enough for the both of us anyways. Ill just make sure I'm her rock when she needs it most and be there for her instead.

(Also wow, I randomly stumbled on this thread while deciding to Google why I'm so dramatic when my S.O. have to leave eachother and it's nice to see its not just me being so reactive. Just wanted to drop my experience as well but I ended up writing a short story/monolgue instead..)
 
NoNameRequired

NoNameRequired

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 18, 2021
Messages
2,062
Location
Mordor
I feel the same way too when my girlfriend leaves. It has been 4 years, maybe she is not coming back.

I recomend you to use your alone time for your own interests.
 
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Lilyalice

New member
Joined
Nov 28, 2021
Messages
1
Location
Uk
Cam across this because I anxiously googled how I was feeling and it’s reassuring to know there are people out there that experience this too. I was in a really long relationship that ended about a year and a half ago when it turned out he had been lying about himself for a really long time.
I think it has fucked me up a lot more than I thought.
I’m with an amazing guy now but every time he leaves I feel like the whole world is ending
I don’t want to be like this, I do r want to be clingy, I really don’t know why I’m like this.
I genuinely don’t feel worthy of his love or his time, I feel so scared of ever losing him and being alone. Absolutely hate myself for feeling like this.
is there anything I can do to stop it?
 
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H8thewaythegameis

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 12, 2021
Messages
101
Location
Santa Ana
Hi there, was wondering if anyone else can relate to this or has ever felt like this.

So basically, I always feel extremely upset and sad whenever my boyfriend leaves, no matter how much time we’ve spent together. Obviously I enjoy spending time with him and I’m always so happy when we’re together but as soon as he leaves, I can just crash and feel so sad. Sometimes as soon as he says he’s got to leave, I can start feeling teary, although I manage to hold it together until he leaves.

I feel really pathetic that I’m feeling this way, we’ve only been together about 4 months and it’s not like we don’t see each other much, it’s normally about 4 days at the most before I see him again, so it seems silly that I get so sad when he goes!

I do try and see friends and do other things when I know I’m not going to see him, I’m aware that I shouldn’t be too dependent on him, but sometimes that can be a struggle!

Does anyone else ever get like this and is it normal? I mean, I know it’s normal to miss your boyfriend, I guess, but to feel like crying just because he’s gone home and I’ve spent about 18 hours with him???*♀
i assume both of you are in your 20s, just making a sarcastic assumption, because i envy couples who started dating in their early 20s
 
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