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feel really down

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phil1981

New member
Joined
Mar 17, 2015
Messages
2
Sorry if this is in the wrong place…



I don’t know what I’m wanting from posting this, just hoping I’ll feel a little better for writing it down.



Feeling really low at the moment for a few reasons.

I’m married (10 years) with 2 small kids under 5, it’s been a tough marriage in recent years for a few reasons.



When arguments flare up it really gets me down, mainly as I have absolutely no-one that I discuss things with or talk to.

Other than work colleagues (who are very nice and I get on with well), I have no friends whatsoever.

Don’t really know how it got to this stage, mainly because I’ve gone along with my wife’s thoughts & feelings all the time (regrettably) and lost touch with any friends I had.

Even if I did have friends though, I’m not sure I could talk about the way I feel properly, it just feels wrong for a male to be emotional and want to talk about stuff like that.



Just recently I feel very fed up and trapped in my relationship.

Money is also very very tight, which doesn’t help things, it’s another constant worry.



I feel like, and do cry for no particular reason at the moment. Feel like it right now writing this.



I can’t write my whole life down on here so I’ll stop at that for now

I’m not even asking an actual question, so not sure what responses people can give me!
 
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phil1981

New member
Joined
Mar 17, 2015
Messages
2
Hi, thank you so much for your reply.

I'll try and address what you have asked.

I'm not sure if I feel depressed, wouldn't really know how to distinguish that from low/overwhelmed/sad.

The friends thing- I wouldn't have a clue how to try and make new friends outside of work. I have no money to take up hobbies where I could meet people, and I'm not the typical bloke that likes football or sports so that's usually a massive conversation killer.

The only people I think I could even possible talk to would be my Dad, but that would be hard, and possibly my wifes sister, she has offered to listen before but its very hard to talk properly to her about her sister!

My relationship with my wife probably needs a whole new thread but basically she falls out with people a lot, and has fell out with my mum and sister quite badly so I hardly see that side of my family now either. She doesn't work at the moment and looks after the kids full time, I do 90% of everything else at home, cooking, cleaning shopping etc.
If I'm going to be honest, all the falling out with my family and the little respect she holds for me has left me not loving her as I should a wife. We live together but there's not much else between us anymore. if there weren't kids we wouldn't be together.
The trapped feeling comes from me not being able to see a way to change things or a way out of the marriage because of the kids/mortgage/money. I have looked into it and it just seems impossible.

Maybe I could find some counselling and it may well help but I have no money for it and I don't see what they could tell me that would change the practicalities that are causing the issues I have.

Thanks again I do appreciate you taking the time to reply
 
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