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Family not letting me go travelling due to being reclusive mentally ill past 10 years

L

lonerandproud

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Jan 18, 2015
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Family not letting me go travelling due to being reclusive mentally ill past 10 years

Hi all

I discussed travelling with my brother and my mother however they basically said No and that you should go with someone rather than yourself.

What is your opinion? Are they right? Should I be going with someone? I have 0 friends so who can I go with? I am 24 years of age.

You're opinion is greatly appreciated.
 
SarahD

SarahD

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Hi there. Not sure about your question. It depends how you feel about it. If you did decide you wanted to go with someone you could always advertise, you'd need to think about the kind of person you wanted to go with and choose somewhere to advertise where that kind of person might see it.

The advantage of going with someone else is that for lots of activities it is easier and more comfortable to join in if you have someone with you. But if you are more comfortable alone there is nothing wrong with that. Would you feel confident and safe on your own? Would you be less likely to socialise at all? Of don't you want to do that anyway?

You may have already done this, but you could think about where exactly you are going and what kind of things you will do, and whether you would be happier solo or accompanied. There is no right or wrong, it is your choice.

Good luck.
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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Welcome to the forum. :hi:
I think they're saying no because they care about you and wouldn't want you to be in a position where you were away from home and got into a crisis.
Having said that, you've got to start somewhere, haven't you?

I have been unwell from the age of 12 and didn't have any friends in my teens, so can relate to you on that level.
Anyway, when I was 19 I booked a few night's away in a B&B because there was a spiritual conference on that I wanted to go to. It was happening about 15 miles from where I lived.. so in a way, I could have gone there each day and arrived back home at night.
But having that experience of being on my own that town and staying away from home - but not so far that I couldn't go back if I had a crisis - was a really good experience.
Funnily enough, I now live in that town in my own flat. :)

So my advice would be to perhaps compromise and stay away somewhere local first, just to have that experience.
 
life2live

life2live

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Ok we were in this session one night and everyone was participating, either singing or playing an instrument or dancing except this middle aged American Women at the back. We all kept saying come on join in and she smiled and said "I will add something later tonight". Finally in the early hours she rose to her feet and said "I'd like to tell you a story" and this is what she said

"I had just finished college and me and a friend had decided to travel. We had read about an old Indian Trail through the Rocky Mountains called the Cherokee Trail and decided to hike it. The day before they were due to travel my friend fell ill with influenza. She was way too ill to do the hike so everyone was surprised when I said I would go on my own. My parents forbade it and there ensued a huge arguement, which I of course won. So over the next week I hiked the Cherokee Trail through the Rockies. I met many people along the way but I camped each night alone. It was a wonderful experience and I had never felt so at one with nature and the world. The sunset and sunrise over the Rockies were a sight to behold.

When I got back I couldn't wait to get my photo's developed so rushed them to a one hour photo lab. I had used up a reel a day on the spectacular scenery. When I got the photo's back I gasped as I looked through them. At the end of every reel there was a photo of me asleep in my sleeping bag."

She went on to say she thought it was her Guardian Angel.

Anyway back to subject yes if you feel confident about traveling on your own why not?
 
N

notrealname

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Yes you should go if you want to.

I agree that your family are probably just trying to be caring...I'm more concerned that you feel they are 'not letting' you go when you are 24. If you feel that your family still have sway over your life, maybe the independence of travelling alone could be really powerful for you!
 
Jaminacaranda

Jaminacaranda

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You ask for opinions but personally I don't feel I could give one without further background information such as whether you have any mental health problems that might make travelling alone difficult or risky and why you want to go travelling and where to, and what you you hope to do there.

As others have said, no-one has the right to stop you from going but perhaps their concern simply reflects the fact that they care for you and are worried that you simply wouldn't cope well with travelling alone. It isn't an easy thing to do for anyone.

You say you have been reclusive but I don't know if that is a fact that should stop anyone going travelling and neither should some mental health problems - but perhaps family members feel you aren't fully aware of your vulnerability?
 
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