- Jan 16, 2019
My heart sunk when I read your post.
I do believe that blocking things out is a mechanism designed to protect us and my instinct tells me maybe it's worth respecting that a little. I don't know if what I've said is out of line, but though it's good to address issues we have, yes, also bear in mind we also need to protect and preserve ourselves. We are our own guardians, our own parents, our own protectors.
As we know, it's all too easy to dive into the dark place when faced with dark memories. It's only natural. But we have a responsibility to ourselves, out of self love, to re-gain our focus to self-loving, self-appreciating thoughts. The hell I know it's hard when you're in an almost addictive cycle of despair.
It's definitely admirable that it sounds like you have a willingness to want to come to terms with the past, which shows strength and honesty with yourself, but make sure you're getting in self care and living in the present too. I know these are big things we are talking about here, and I fully respect that.
I am glad to be here for you, and I'm sure the other people on this thread are. We can hold some space for you here, our presence may be a small thing compared with what you are going through, but we are here holding the space until you naturally learn to guide yourself back to your lighter, nurturing side and give the same compassion you give to others to yourself. It's a side that's there, I know, I've seen it in past help and support you've given me.