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:'( failure

R

Rhiannon_m

Member
Joined
Dec 27, 2012
Messages
12
I feel like a failure. I relapsed last week and haven't been able to stop now I am covered in marks again. I thought I was over SH but I was wrong and then I went back to my old ways. I hate myself that I let it go to far once again :'( why do I hate to be like this
 
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V

Viktoria

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 11, 2014
Messages
2,276
I'm so sorry you relapsed. I don't really know what to advice. I'm sure you know all the alternatives and they may not work.

I hope you can refrain from doing it.

Take care friend, big hugs
 
V

Viktoria

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Joined
Jul 11, 2014
Messages
2,276
You're not a failure, you're just going through a tough time
 

MarlieeB

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Jan 15, 2013
Messages
25,043
Hi Rhiannon.

You certainly aren't a failure in any way.

You can have blips every now and again and hopefully this is one.

Please next time you get the urge try to distract or even come on here and talk.

x
 
piedwagtail91

piedwagtail91

Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2011
Messages
20
Location
Lancashire uk
you're not a failure, life is all up's and downs, you're having a down.
the most important thing is not to beat yourself up about it.
that will only make you feel worse, when that happens it may make you feel like more sh?
i know this is a long shot and probably sounds totally alien to how you're feeling about yourself and the thoughts about what you deserve, what you don't deserve, so if this link doesn't help then let it go.
Self-compassion - A Healthier Way of Relating to Yourself
it 's a link to self compassion, it's a good site, lots of info and videos about why you DO deserve to treat yourself with kindness and care.
yeh sounds sad doesn't it? but it does help.
there are some guided meditations in the links to the right of the page, don't worry they're not religious and you don't have to sit cross legged on a mat.
when you're feeling down and things are hurting the soften soothe and allow can help a lot in being with the pain and helping you get through it.
if you're into reading, then KN's book is a really good read, your local library should have it.
if you find it's not for you then let it go and more importantly don't feel bad about it, it's not for everyone.
 
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balancekeeper

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 23, 2015
Messages
51
Location
Accrington, UK
Your not a failure, all of us who are trying to Kick SH Will have slip ups, its just part of the recovery process.

So Dont be so hard on yourself
 
J

jimindigo

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 13, 2012
Messages
198
Let me add:There is a concept called the 'whole of,part of,error'. This is when we blame
the WHOLE of ourselves,for some PART of our selves. O.K. you don't like this PART that
happened,but for God's sake,that is not ALL OF YOU! We are much too complicated
beings with multi-faceted aspects,feelings,talents,nature,personality,etc.,etc.,to judge
ourselves so harshly on any ONE THING---what about all the REST of you?
Wagtail gives good advice about compassion,here's other,a book:"Self-Compassion",
by Kristin Neff. She has website too,just bang her name in search box.
Deepest Respect,
jimindigo
 
piedwagtail91

piedwagtail91

Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2011
Messages
20
Location
Lancashire uk
Jimindigo, my link and book suggestion are the same as yours! Good to know someone else recognises Kristin neffs work.
rhiannon. You are more than sh.
learn from this relapse, no matter what your thoughts tell you it will pass.regroup and come back.you've done it once and gained experience,you can use that experience to do it again.
Don't be hard on yourself, get you on your side.
 
R

Rhiannon_m

Member
Joined
Dec 27, 2012
Messages
12
Hey guys. Thank you for all your responses and to those who have me links to a website I'll give that a look. Thank you again. It means a lot for people like you guys not to judge and just be there for me and to be caring thank you :)
 
R

Rhiannon_m

Member
Joined
Dec 27, 2012
Messages
12
I would love to watch it but unfortunately I am in Australia and we don't have Channel 4. Do you know what the TV show is called because maybe I can watch it online? I would be interested in watching it
 
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Rhiannon_m

Member
Joined
Dec 27, 2012
Messages
12
Never mind I just opened the link :) thanks
 
piedwagtail91

piedwagtail91

Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2011
Messages
20
Location
Lancashire uk
No one knows the difficulties another person is struggling with. We none of us have a right to judge anyone.
Take care.
 
katya

katya

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 4, 2013
Messages
2,052
Location
England
You're not a failure. You've done well for getting into recovery in the first place. Relapses are often part of recovery. You'll get there. Just remember you're worth far more than you realise.
 
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