Failing and Self-Hatred

[misunderstood256]

I've had depression for a long time, I think - It's never been formally diagnosed, but I know that I have no motivation to do anything. I hate everything about myself, and can't do anything right. I know that people are lying to me when they say that I'm a good person, because I know the kind of person that I am - And if other people really knew me, they'd hate that person too. I find myself being so empty all the time, the only thing I want to do is sleep, and I can't get done the things that I need to get done. More than anything though, I'm lonely, and stuck in a cycle of hating that loneliness and knowing that I don't deserve it. I'm a hopeless person, and I don't know what to do about it anymore. I wonder, all of the time - How could anyone love me? How could anyone stand me? I just don't know anymore.

 

[bpd2020]

Maybe you could try to think hard and see what you can list that you feel is a positive quality you have? If you can think of at least one thing then I think that may be a starting point.

 

[Mayflower7]

Hi,
You really should see a dr, there are many treatments out there.
It is the illness talking, I hope you feel better very soon.
Take care

 

[Pollypop]

I've had depression for a long time, I think - It's never been formally diagnosed, but I know that I have no motivation to do anything. I hate everything about myself, and can't do anything right. I know that people are lying to me when they say that I'm a good person, because I know the kind of person that I am - And if other people really knew me, they'd hate that person too. I find myself being so empty all the time, the only thing I want to do is sleep, and I can't get done the things that I need to get done. More than anything though, I'm lonely, and stuck in a cycle of hating that loneliness and knowing that I don't deserve it. I'm a hopeless person, and I don't know what to do about it anymore. I wonder, all of the time - How could anyone love me? How could anyone stand me? I just don't know anymore.

If you haven’t been formally diagnosed I think you see your doctor.
Although it sounds very much like depression there may also be other
things as well.
Getting a correct diagnosis will then help get the correct treatment.

I hope you can get something done that will help.

 

[Control1234]

I feel like this too - except I know I am a fraud and I only recently realised what an awful person I am. I am trying everything I can to live in the present moment and try to be a better person moving forward and not let my past define me. There are loads of great motivational videos on YouTube and like the others said see if your doctor can help. Exercise and mediation also really helps me. You just have to try and move forward day by day.

 

[treasurebox]

Choose to be happy because you were created to be happy. There will always be people who will like you no matter who you are. Open your heart to them.

Music helps me. Music therapy or listening to good and uplifting songs in youtube makes me feel and think better.

Also doing what I love to do which is writing helps me too. What do you love to do? What are you good at? Is it cooking, baking, gardening, doing arts and crafts? Do it and it will make you happy and even be successful.