- Jan 18, 2010
I can't stand much more, I am currently sitting here on the computer because I'm too upset to drive to work, shaking, tearful and cant rest or settle to anything. Reason, I've spent the last few days noticing that my partner has been looking for a good reason to do a "rage", and of course he's got to provoke me so it can be my fault. I'ts very important to him that his awful behaviour should be someone elses fault and I have told him I don't mind, I just take it as read that everything he does is my fault! You see I don't care about fault, the way I operate is if theres a problem lets sort it out and find a solution, I dont care whos fault it is because it doesn't matter if all you want to do is sort things out. I'd rather be the person that was looking for a solution to things. Having said that our lives are quite good at the moment, he is working and stacking up wads of money, I'm still skint and struggling to feed the animals, so I really did need to go to work today. But I'm a counsellor starting a new business and I can't work if I'm upset like this, I'm no good to anyone. If I try to get away from him I have to sell a house which I really love and live in rented accommodation for ever which I can't do with the animals. Why does he have to be so nasty because he has depression? I've been struggling with periods of depression all my life and now that I'm much better I don't appreciate bein pulled down again, help! Any suggestions for how to be calm enough not to make this worse?