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Emotionally Immature Parents

jajingna

jajingna

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
6,181
Location
Canada
My parents were definitely not emotionally mature people. I'm not sure what emotional maturity means. An understanding of yourself would help. The ability to self-regulate, whatever that involves. I think of that as not remaining stuck in an unhappy mood for too long if you can see it as just a mood, and not be overwhelmed. But sometimes I'm in a bad mood for a few hours.

Parents seemed unhappy most of the time. Now the adult children have a lot of baggage. I think a lot of hurt feelings have stayed with us for a very long time. Things we don't talk about. But those feelings act like a poison. A slow-acting poison that over years diminishes health.
 
R

RockyMountainsGirl

Well-known member
Joined
May 1, 2021
Messages
200
Location
Alberta, Canada
I agree, adult children get baggage from their parents. The fact that you recognize that your parents mistreated you, and that this has affected your moods, shows that you have the awareness to get help. You can talk about what happened to you. Your bad moods don't have to be permanent, and you don't have to live with the hurt. It can seem like a big step to get help from a therapist, but that's often the only way to learn how to feel better. Millions of people get help that way when they struggle with their feelings and moods. I'm seeing a trauma therapist in Canada to help me get over the trauma I experienced while growing up. My parents were abusive and neglectful, and I cried much of the time. I didn't learn to regulate my emotions. I took one small step to get started by asking my family doctor to refer me to a good psychologist.
 
jajingna

jajingna

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
6,181
Location
Canada
I started this thread after seeing a video where someone reviewed this book:

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I'm doubtful any book can help with healing in such matters, but they can still be interesting to read.
 
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