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Embarrassing driving phobia

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HersheyMilkChocolate

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I am 27 years old and I have never had my drivers license. I don’t know why but driving has always been something that scares me. When I was a teenager my mom would try to teach me but I would avoid it the best way I could. Sure, I drove sometimes with her but I think I avoided it more times than the times I’ve driven. I took a drivers Ed course so that I could get my license during my freshmen year in college but the instructor yelled at me and in the end told me I should just get my permit, not my license. I was almost 19. I felt very discouraged and never pursued my license or drove much after that. Friends have tried to help me and now my boyfriend tries too but I still have this unexplained fear. Now, I do not try at all and I have to get a ride everywhere. I feel so guilty and like a burden on all of my loved ones. My family is supportive but I know they prefer I get my license so that I can drive myself around. My mom even gave me her old car but it just sits in the driveway.

lately I have been extra anxious because I got a job offer that pays well but a license is needed & I don’t know how I will get to and from work everyday. This is very distressing due to the fact that I just graduated in May with my Masters in Mental Health Counseling and want to start my career. I feel that my driving phobia and fear of judgment is holding me back from my full potential. On the good side, I just started counseling 2 weeks ago. Hopefully it helps but it will not solve my immediate problem of showing up to work this upcoming Monday.

Any advice?

All advice and support is greatly appreciated!!
 
Jolly

Jolly

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Welcome forum people will be here to support and help shortly
 
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dansell123

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Do you have your permit? I would try driving for very short periods of time with someone else in a controlled environment (like a parking lot or something). Gradually expose yourself to driving more and more...go for 2 minutes, then 5, then 10 etc...
 
kind_recording

kind_recording

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I'm in the same exact boat as you. In fact, I was right about to make my first post here about my driving phobia. I am awfully embarrassed about it as well, and I definitely feel that my life is stunted by it.
 
H

HersheyMilkChocolate

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Do you have your permit? I would try driving for very short periods of time with someone else in a controlled environment (like a parking lot or something). Gradually expose yourself to driving more and more...go for 2 minutes, then 5, then 10 etc...
no I do not have my permit. I should gradually expose myself but the embarrassment stops me from asking someone to help.It is honestly so crippling
 
P

planneraddict

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I also have a fear of driving, though I wouldn't call it a phobia.

My situation is a bit different since I live in the UK, in an area with good public transport, so I've never really needed to drive (yet). I feel like it's more common here than in the USA for people not to drive. But at some point in my life I might need to learn. I took lessons, and didn't feel afraid when I was with my instructor, but I failed my test and never went back. I'm not sure why I feel this way, I think it's a combination of being afraid of an accident, fear of making mistakes and annoying other road users, plus having no faith in my multitasking abilities.

Would it help to spend some time untangling the reasons why you might be afraid, and is that something your therapist could help with? Being shouted at by an instructor sounds like a really unpleasant experience for an 18-year-old trying to get their license, and if you're feeling under a lot of pressure to drive, then that probably isn't helping either, IMO.
 
C

Comorbidity

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I also have a fear of driving, though I wouldn't call it a phobia.

My situation is a bit different since I live in the UK, in an area with good public transport, so I've never really needed to drive (yet). I feel like it's more common here than in the USA for people not to drive. But at some point in my life I might need to learn. I took lessons, and didn't feel afraid when I was with my instructor, but I failed my test and never went back. I'm not sure why I feel this way, I think it's a combination of being afraid of an accident, fear of making mistakes and annoying other road users, plus having no faith in my multitasking abilities.

Would it help to spend some time untangling the reasons why you might be afraid, and is that something your therapist could help with? Being shouted at by an instructor sounds like a really unpleasant experience for an 18-year-old trying to get their license, and if you're feeling under a lot of pressure to drive, then that probably isn't helping either, IMO.
You really don't need to drive in Manc, plus insurance is sky high, don't be afriad to make mistakes while learning, driving is a skill your subconscious takes care of the vast majority of after a while of driving, all the mechanics of driving the car, changing gear, checking mirrors, signalling, checking roundabouts to see if your entry is clear as you approach them etc
 
H

HersheyMilkChocolate

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Hi Everyone! I wrote this post 4 months ago about my unexplained fear for driving and the anxiety I have about driving. Today, through therapy, fasting and praying, I GOT MY LICENSE!!!! I am so happy to share this testimony with you all! It has been a challenging few months but everything was worth it. I am still anxious while driving and am not completely comfortable yet but I’m doing it & that counts for something.

To everyone who has this same fear, do not give up. If you have to drive on the same street over and over until you are comfortable, DO IT! It is worth it for your freedom and peace of mind. Process your feelings about driving with a close friend or family member or therapist. It will help!!! Thank you all for your support.
 
kind_recording

kind_recording

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A
Hi Everyone! I wrote this post 4 months ago about my unexplained fear for driving and the anxiety I have about driving. Today, through therapy, fasting and praying, I GOT MY LICENSE!!!! I am so happy to share this testimony with you all! It has been a challenging few months but everything was worth it. I am still anxious while driving and am not completely comfortable yet but I’m doing it & that counts for something.

To everyone who has this same fear, do not give up. If you have to drive on the same street over and over until you are comfortable, DO IT! It is worth it for your freedom and peace of mind. Process your feelings about driving with a close friend or family member or therapist. It will help!!! Thank you all for your support.
Awesome!
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Well done, such great news thanks for sharing your story.
 
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