• Share. Be Supported. Recover.

    We are a friendly, safe community supporting each other's mental health. We are open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.

Drowning in anxiety and feeling incapable as a human being

H

hairybanana

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 18, 2021
Messages
3,697
Location
Australia
I’m not doing well. Feeling overwhelmed. Have been feeling sick all week and that always gets me down. Makes me feel worse. I’m really starting to get stressed out with my kid starting school next year. The schools where we live right now aren’t great, my ex and I had planned on moving to a better area so my kid will get a solid start to his education. Now it’s all falling on me. I have to pack up our things fromthe house I lived in with my wife. The first home my son knew. I have to clean it up and get it all sorted so we can get the bond back. Gotta find a place that’s pet friendly to move to because I can not and will not just turf my dog. So far no houses have become available in a price I can afford.

I’m stressed about money, not having enough, not earning enough. I wish I could do better for my son. I feel so ashamed of myself sometimes.

Theresso much coming up and it’s doing my head in.

I think a large part of feeling sick this week has had to do with my anxiety around this new girl. As nice as she appears to be, this just isn’t the rihjt time for me to think about dating anyone. That’s stressing me out massively.

I feel like a shit dad, like I was a shit husband, a shit person. Feel like I can’t get anything right amd I’m just incapable.

I’m sofucking stressed out I’ve just gone and had a freakin teary in the shower. Wish hiding under the doona was an option. I don’t feel capable and there’s too much on my plate.

I just want to give my son what he deserves. And it’s really hard doing it on my own. Feeling very out of my depth.

I didn’t sleep last night. Didn’t even feel tired, my mind was just on fire. Distracted myself with some game time, haven’t played a game in forever. Then went to bed around 1 and by 3am decided it was pointless trying to sleep so I got up and did some work. Very stressed that I’ve not put in the time and effort with work this year and how that’s going to affect moving house/our options of where we can afford etc. i ended up getting some work done; which was good, then back to bed around 5am. Slept til 9. Sleep is a fucking shit show atm cause im so fucking stressed I can’t get my mind to switch off.

I’m drowning in the anxiety of it all. And i used to have a handle on my anxiety. Not so much these days. Forgot to take my meds today as well. That never helps.

I wish I was better at managing my shit and could do better for my son. I feel like such a failure.
 
W

Wolfy123

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 30, 2021
Messages
57
Location
Netherlands
You're doing all you can do right now. You have to keep going💪

I've been experiencing A LOT of stress myself. I might be able to give you some advice if you'd like?
 
S

SadRainbow

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 5, 2021
Messages
1,989
Location
Norfolk
I'm really sorry you're having such a hard time HB. I know I wouldn't cope well in that situation. You WILL get through this!
 
L

LouieLou

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 1, 2021
Messages
126
Location
Wales
I've been there and now on the precipitous step in my early recovery. Please don't be ashamed go to your go and ask for help. I'm on medication a d the home treatment team is visiting me as my depressionis due to work related stress/ exhaustion. I kinda on both sides as I saw as a child my father ill with bipolar and my regret for my dad is that he didn't ask for help earlier as think it would have been better for everyone in the family. Now as the one getting help with acute depression my husband and I have decided to stay with mum whilst I am vulnerable as have expedienced suicidal thoughts due to sleep deprivation. It became so severe they have had to prescribe me melatonin tablets. Please don't suffer in silence x
 
H

hairybanana

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 18, 2021
Messages
3,697
Location
Australia
Hey Wolfy and Rainbow @Wolfy123 @SadRainbow thanks for the support, much appreciated. And yes Wolfy I’m always happy to hear some suggestions, thank you for the offer.

I got a decent sleep last night, but have still woken feeling sick this morning. I’m really fucking over it. I don’t know if it’s stress or backlash from trauma nightmares, maybe both. I really hate having to deal with the physical aspects of mental illness, I find it so much more difficult to manage for some reason.
 
S

SadRainbow

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 5, 2021
Messages
1,989
Location
Norfolk
Glad you slept well but I'm sorry you're still sick. Have you managed to eat anything yet today?
 
H

hairybanana

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 18, 2021
Messages
3,697
Location
Australia
Hey @LouieLou thanks for your response. I wish your dad had gotten help for your sake. It must have been very difficult for you. I feel for you.

I think that’s great you’ve gone to your mums for extra support, and glad to see your husband seems to be a good support, that makes all the difference.

Yeah I’ve been getting help for years—which at times seems hard to believe. But yeah, GP did prescribe melatonin for me too, did fuck all for me though. She wanted to go for sleep meds but at the time I said no, side effects and dependency on them just sounded like more trouble than it was worth. I dunno. I need to check in with her again, I couldn’t make it to my last appointment. Just got too anxious and was too depressed to leave the house. I went to reschedule my appointment but she was booked out for the next 6 weeks or something so I didn’t bother. Didn’t make it in for my last therapy session either, felt too sick to go. Ugh. What a cycle.
 
H

hairybanana

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 18, 2021
Messages
3,697
Location
Australia
Glad you slept well but I'm sorry you're still sick. Have you managed to eat anything yet today?
Yeah I’ve still been able to eat, just not anything healthy. White bread, salty crackers etc etc. none of that is helping my rapidly growing old man gut haha man I need to get back in shape. It’s all gone downhill after turning 30.
 
24thMAU

24thMAU

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 21, 2021
Messages
55
Location
Idaho Falls, ID
I know you probably already know this, however: Sit down, and prioritize what needs to be done. Make a plan of attack and work through each problem, one at a time. If you try and tackle everything at once, you will become overwhelmed. Take one problem at a time, one issue at a time. Then move on. One more bit of advice: As an older male, prioritize that exercise regime. It will help with everything.
 
H

hairybanana

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 18, 2021
Messages
3,697
Location
Australia
I know you probably already know this, however: Sit down, and prioritize what needs to be done. Make a plan of attack and work through each problem, one at a time. If you try and tackle everything at once, you will become overwhelmed. Take one problem at a time, one issue at a time. Then move on. One more bit of advice: As an older male, prioritize that exercise regime. It will help with everything.
Motivation to exercise has flown well and truly out the window. But I’ll get back into it eventually. Helps that we’re heading towards some nice weather here in Aus, makes ya wanna get out.
Yeah I have currently got a shockingly long list of things to do, it seems to keep growing though. The never ending list.
I wish my head was in a better place to deal with my kid starting school. It’s really stressing me out, almost has me wishing my ex was still around to help navigate it all. Almost.
Have managed to eat healthier today and not wanted to spew it back up so hoping that’s easing up now. Hoping to wake up tomorrow feeling right as rain, or at least not wanting to spew anymore
 
24thMAU

24thMAU

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 21, 2021
Messages
55
Location
Idaho Falls, ID
I get it, truly get it. My youngest daughter started her senior year in high school. Due to all my issues, I haven't seen her in 2 years. She lives with her mother in another state. I'm hoping to be able to at least attend her graduation. I'm 57 yrs old and I have to constantly push myself to exercise. However, for me it is worth it. Very theraputic.
 
H

hairybanana

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 18, 2021
Messages
3,697
Location
Australia
I get it, truly get it. My youngest daughter started her senior year in high school. Due to all my issues, I haven't seen her in 2 years. She lives with her mother in another state. I'm hoping to be able to at least attend her graduation. I'm 57 yrs old and I have to constantly push myself to exercise. However, for me it is worth it. Very theraputic.
Aw man I’m sorry to hear that, must be very rough for both of you hey? Are you able to talk on the phone with your daughter? I hope you can get along to her graduation when the time comes. Neither of my parents went to my graduation, but my best mates dad gave me a pat on the shoulder and a “good job” which was nice. Not even sure how I managed to graduate considering I failed a couple of classes. Ah it’s fun to reminisce.
 
Bod

Bod

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 19, 2021
Messages
7,807
Location
Pretty Good
Hey man I just want to say I don't think your a failure at all, your just going through some WTF moments and sadly it's stressing you to hell and back. I'm sure your son knows his dad is trying and doing his best and that is all you can do at the moment, try to get a hold of that stress as that can be really dangerous to anyone let alone us so just try and take things a bit more slowly and it will start to fall into place.
 
H

hairybanana

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 18, 2021
Messages
3,697
Location
Australia
Hey man I just want to say I don't think your a failure at all, your just going through some WTF moments and sadly it's stressing you to hell and back. I'm sure your son knows his dad is trying and doing his best and that is all you can do at the moment, try to get a hold of that stress as that can be really dangerous to anyone let alone us so just try and take things a bit more slowly and it will start to fall into place.
Cheers man, appreciate the support. Yeah I’ve been getting myself worked up about having to set a meeting with the school. Needing to see if I can get him accepted if we’re out of the school district. If my ex were still here, we’d go together. My ex was more nervous about things than I am, and in a weird way it kind of helped force me to be stronger. So if she were there with me, I’d still have to handle it all, but it would be like I’m doing it for her too cause she wouldn’t be able to deal with it. I need to get it over and done with cause it’s the main source of my stress atm. But ugh. It’s tough. Feel useless being like this. Some dad huh? Too anxious to get my kid into school. Fuck me thats just pathetic. Wish I could get my shit together again. I wasn’t this effed up with anxiety a year ago. Bad timing I guess.
 
24thMAU

24thMAU

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 21, 2021
Messages
55
Location
Idaho Falls, ID
Aw man I’m sorry to hear that, must be very rough for both of you hey? Are you able to talk on the phone with your daughter? I hope you can get along to her graduation when the time comes. Neither of my parents went to my graduation, but my best mates dad gave me a pat on the shoulder and a “good job” which was nice. Not even sure how I managed to graduate considering I failed a couple of classes. Ah it’s fun to reminisce.
I do the best I can. I made a lot of mistakes when she was growing up and it is coming back to haunt me now. I am just taking one day at a time. I have about 8 more months to go. So, I am hoping she will allow me to go. Thank you for taking the time to respond.
 
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
Solitude1 I'm Drowning Depression Forum 3
N I am feeling worse and worse. I feel like I'm drowning. Depression Forum 33
M I'm drowning Depression Forum 2
F Floating or Drowning Depression Forum 2
B drowning in depression Depression Forum 1
D I'm sorry for complaining but I feel like I'm drowning Depression Forum 3
domegan1990 Drowning !!!! Depression Forum 29
U Help - I am drowning in my own life Depression Forum 2
LoneKnight i'm Drowning Depression Forum 2
E Not waving but drowning... Depression Forum 10
M feels like im drowning again Depression Forum 2
C I'm drowning right now Depression Forum 4
razza Drowning Depression Forum 157
D Depression, loneliness, anxiety and leaving school Depression Forum 4
A Depression and anxiety Depression Forum 2
stevie_sloth Anyone taken the Beck Depression or Anxiety Inventories? Depression Forum 4
A It’s Me Again…Venlafaxine,Anxiety Etc Depression Forum 1
B Anxiety and Depression at 21 years old Depression Forum 8
M High functioning depression and anxiety Depression Forum 18
jajingna Magnesium for depression and anxiety? Depression Forum 5
Fioletovayalien Cold water swimming to treat depression/anxiety Depression Forum 5
R It's not working... Depression and anxiety need help Depression Forum 20
L Acute anxiety & Moderate/Severe Depression Depression Forum 17
O Chronic Depression & Anxiety now leading to physical problems! Depression Forum 10
A Depression and anxiety Depression Forum 5
M Can I take Wellbutrin or Bupropion if I have social anxiety? Depression Forum 2
F Depression or maybe anxiety... looking to control it before it gets worse Depression Forum 8
J Anxiety stress th usual combo Depression Forum 2
whyme88 Overthinking/anxiety leading to depression? Depression Forum 11
C Depression... and anxiety? Depression Forum 13
S anxiety and depression, does it ever end?? Depression Forum 9
whyme88 Anxiety leading to depression? Depression Forum 7
W My Partner Suffers from Depression & Anxiety Depression Forum 6
LostNorthernStar Physical Symptoms of Depression & Anxiety? Depression Forum 12
A What is your bigger struggle, depression or anxiety? Depression Forum 53
E Anxiety Depression Forum 4
D Why do I seemingly not want to get better? Loneliness, failing university, depression, severe anxiety, and not doing anything about it Depression Forum 7
T Depression and Anxiety - possibly triggered by medication Depression Forum 1
M My dad has now caused me to get anxiety attacks Depression Forum 5
P Worry-Anxiety-Trapped Depression Forum 2
W finally not depressed anymore but anxiety is murdering me Depression Forum 7
Murasakibee Christmas Anxiety *tw* Depression Forum 1
Dais Workbook about anxiety and depression I personally found useful. You may like it too. Depression Forum 2
TylersOutlet24 Depression/Anxiety - never ending emotional rollercoaster you DONT want to be on. Depression Forum 3
H Insomnia and anxiety from starting anti-depressant. Suggestions??? Depression Forum 6
S besides self talk what actually reduced your severe depression or anxiety? Depression Forum 17
S Anxiety, Depression, Self-Esteem? Depression Forum 7
TylersOutlet24 How I experience Depression/Anxiety and coping mechanisms to help. Depression Forum 2
Mrs Tiggywinkle Nutrition for depression and anxiety......very good video. 🙂 Depression Forum 3
J Depression with Anxiety Depression Forum 10

Similar threads

Top