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Don't know what to do...

petal

petal

Member
Founding Member
Joined
Mar 5, 2008
Messages
16
Location
Nottingham
I thought everything was getting better when I got my new job, which I start in 2 weeks, but I think my boyfriend is having a hard time dealing with things at the moment.

He doesn't really talk to me and I don't feel that he's able to show me that he loves me or that he wants to be with me. He's quiet all the time and doesn't hug me much or tell me that he loves me, and this makes me think that he doesn't want me around.

The other day on our 2 year anniversary he told me he didn't think he loves me as much as I love him. Now I feel really down and I don't know what to do. I still love him but I need him to make me feel loved, or I don't know what I'd do. I don't know if I could cope with a break up.
 
D

Dollit

Guest
The thing about relationships is that they're not always equal Petal. Sometimes one person has greater needs than the other but it should balance out in the long run. I know it's difficult to give someone else support when you need it yourself but it can pay big dividends to your self-esteem and to your relationship. Perhaps you could spend sometime talking to him about what he's been doing etc.?

And well done for getting that new job! :)
 
petal

petal

Member
Founding Member
Joined
Mar 5, 2008
Messages
16
Location
Nottingham
I do try talking to him about what he's been doing, he just doesn't talk because he assumes I wont understand (he's doing a Physics degree).
Also a lot of the time he just shrugs his shoulders and doesn't say anything, which causes a huge barrier I think.

I really am trying because I've been in a relationship before which broke down because I was ill and we didn't talk about things, so I'm trying really hard not to let it happen again.

The problem is, I don't know if he actually cares enough to try...
 
D

Dollit

Guest
Well you're not in an easy place Petal that's for sure. Only you can decide how far you want to push things or how much of a risk with the relationship you want to take. But, for what it's worth, I'll listen all you want to. :hug:
 
scottsblue

scottsblue

Well-known member
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Apr 20, 2008
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1,902
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England
only you know how you truely feel petel. i`m sure you`ll do the right thing :)
 
R

rose

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Founding Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2008
Messages
80
hi petal.
you will have to bear with me im pony at trying to get my point across hence dont post to often
here goes , life with mh is exhausting and hard , a constant battle with yourself and thoughts , but also difficult for those around us , as they could not and will not ever understand unless they have been through a simalar , i suppose helplessness at times
im sure your boyfriend loves you but finds it hard to understand , and things we dont understand we sometimes push away
also relationships sometimes well become more of a habbit or crutch for support or fear of being alone and having to cope alone ,
but if you have friends and family then you are never alone taking a different rout home if you get my meen
i hope you get things sorted and i wish you all the well in the world ,
and hope i didnt put my size 7ns in it
blessings rose:flowers:
 
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