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Don't know what to do

M

Mouse96

New member
Joined
Jun 20, 2021
Messages
3
Location
Belgium
(Sorry for the bad English in advance)

Here's the context: I'm M24 and my girlfriend is F25. We are together since 9 month today, we do not live together, she have a small flat and I still live at my parents place. But we spent 5 days a week sleeping together, we are in an open relationship since the beginning, meaning, each of us can have sexual relations with anyone but we need to speak about it afterwards if it's still ok for each other.

Now the event, 1 week ago I had a big issue over money problems with my father, I asked him for my money because I work for him. He never really paid me because I still live in his house, he just giving me pocket money which is not enough since I spend a lot of time in my gf house. So he gat angry because I asked for my due and he slapped me on the face. That day I tried to kill myself, didn't had the guts to do it. Since that I'm weak and helpless, I explained what happened to my gf the same day. She supported me a lot the whole week. But then I leave her house for one day and she called another guy and slept with him, precisely one week after my suicidal attempt. I was still very weak and started hating her, and questioning her about why she would to that in that period of time. Idk, she could maybe wait a little more? I know she already supported a suicidal guy a whole week, but we are together to support each other in these situations too I think.

Don't know what to do next.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Messages
9,881
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England
Are you coping at the moment? Please don't hurt yourself, life will get easier and you will be happy again.

It sounds like you don't have much support. Is there anyone you can turn to? Are the mental health services helpful in Belgium?

It is very important if you are so distressed you want to die, that you ask for help from the hospital. I understand why you felt so bad but your life is precious.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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England
  • 112 is the national emergency number in Belgium.
  • Stichting Zelfmoordlijn 1813 provides a 24/7 national suicide prevention phone line and a webchat everyday from 18:30 to 22:00 for Dutch language.[18]
  • Stichting Centre de Prévention du Suicide provides a 24/7 national suicide prevention phone line for French language.[19]
    • The Center for the Prevention of Suicide hotline can be reached at 080032123.
    • The Center for the Prevention of Suicide website and Forum can be found at J'ai besoin d'aide.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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England
Are any of the above numbers of use to you?

Please keep writing. We can help support you through this. Life is hard right now but it will get better.
 
T

Trixie416

Member
Joined
Jun 13, 2021
Messages
24
Location
South Florida
Mouse, I'm sorry for how you're feeling. You're not weak, however. When someone is abusive toward you, they're the bad guy. Not you. I pray that you'll find the strength and independence you need to find your way away from abusive relationships.

As for your GF, not excusing what she did, but you both agreed to an open relationship. She played by the rules. I agree, it was probably not good timing. Perhaps that was her way of coping with a heavy situation; the past week with your suicide attempt. I hope you two can discuss and work through it. IMO, I'm not sure the open relationship is a very good idea, though.

Mouse, if you don't see a mental health professional already, I'd strongly suggest you do. Suicide should never be a thought. There are WONDERFUL people out there WANTING to help you.
 
M

Mouse96

New member
Joined
Jun 20, 2021
Messages
3
Location
Belgium
Are you coping at the moment? Please don't hurt yourself, life will get easier and you will be happy again.

It sounds like you don't have much support. Is there anyone you can turn to? Are the mental health services helpful in Belgium?

It is very important if you are so distressed you want to die, that you ask for help from the hospital. I understand why you felt so bad but your life is precious.
I already been followed by a psychologist for a trauma in my childhood, didn't been successful so I stopped and never tried again.

I have few friends, who's been very supportive towards my situations. But it was not enough to solve my issues.

I will try again to be followed by a professional.

Thank you for your support Tawny.
 
M

Mouse96

New member
Joined
Jun 20, 2021
Messages
3
Location
Belgium
Mouse, I'm sorry for how you're feeling. You're not weak, however. When someone is abusive toward you, they're the bad guy. Not you. I pray that you'll find the strength and independence you need to find your way away from abusive relationships.

As for your GF, not excusing what she did, but you both agreed to an open relationship. She played by the rules. I agree, it was probably not good timing. Perhaps that was her way of coping with a heavy situation; the past week with your suicide attempt. I hope you two can discuss and work through it. IMO, I'm not sure the open relationship is a very good idea, though.

Mouse, if you don't see a mental health professional already, I'd strongly suggest you do. Suicide should never be a thought. There are WONDERFUL people out there WANTING to help you.
Hi Trixie, thanks for your feedback. I think you're right when you say; it was her way of coping with a heavy situation. But in these moments I don't have the Hindsight to understand that and all I want is to be hugged and feel like at least someone is holding on to me.

Thanks for your advices, seeing a professional is going to be my next step to get through this.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Messages
9,881
Location
England
We are here too, and make sure you keep in touch with your friends also. It is important to have as much support as possible, to keep yourself surrounded by good people who make you feel a bit better.

If my boyfriend ever cheated on me, that would be the end of the relationship, no matter the reason. It would be the end of us. It is disrespectful and you deserve better. Everyone deserves a faithful partner.

Please think of us before you consider suicide again. We are here.
 
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