Does anyone ..........

[Fedup]

........ care for somebody and are also unwell themselve's ?

 

[AJS]

Me

even tough I work in mental health and have done for years i've had my time of depression. My mother had Huntingtons so I spent all my young life up to being 17 caring for her. My depression was untreated because I didn't have anyone to tell! The only way I got out of it was working hard on my thoughts and changing the way I thought about life. So in 1994 my mother died and the release of pressure was amazing, and so to the present day I look after people with mental health issues because I know I can relate to them. My life has completly turned around and I have myself to thank for that no one else cared enough to ask me how I was so I never told them.
The corner can be turned and you can come out of the other side, you just have to believe in yourself. I believe in me. I AM A GOOD PERSON and i've told myself that statement every day.

 

[daffy]

I too am a carer for my sister who has bechets syndrome and my elderly mum who has the beginnings of dementia.

My sister and i care for each other tho. I take her and my mum shopping etc.
And when my sister is well and im not she looks after me.. I do have to be careful tho not to get stressed as this can trigger an attack in me.

 

[AJS]

bechets syndrome wow not a nice thing to have to put up with at all. Your poor sis must get so p****ed off and I wouldn't blame her at all.
I had a client who's mother had it, she's the only person I know of (besides your sis now) and she had it in her mouth and sometimes her eyes. She would find comfort in eating ice cream god love her, she said it cooled the pain in her mouth. She also said it was a fab reason to eat ice cream all the time, nice lady too.

 

[Megannie]

When my illness was at it worse I had four young children, my elder daughter, age 11 at the start took it on herself to look after her brothers and sisters. When I was at my very worse and in hospital she was 18 and doing her A levels, she helped her Dad look after the whole home and family it was a difficult time and my husband was given no support from outside the family.
This resulted in my daughter not getting grades she needed to go into teaching, so she did in an HND in care and went on to work with the elderly. When she qualified as a Mental Nurse we were so proud because we knew even at the age of 11 that she was a natural for that profession.

I know that doesn't answer your question fed up but it was through caring for me that my daughter once she believed in herself went ahead and did her training.

I;m sure it must be quite demanding caring for someone with mental health problems when you have them yourself.

 

[Fedup]

Welldone to your daughter

Yes it's very demanding , i also help care for my handicapped brother .

right back at ya x

 

[Megannie]

You're an angel you are.

 

[messedupmiss]

Carer and cared for...

Hi there

Thought I would let you know that my wife and I are I guess co-dependent on each other. We both have mental health problems and the one who is the most well at the time cares for the other. We also have a disabled daughter and a baby thats nearly two so lots of caring goes on in our house, but we wouldnt have it any other way. Its our way and our norm if that makes sense?

Do others have any suggestions for helping when you feel too ill to care? It seems we cope but then pay for it later, collapsing after the crisis etc

 

[april]

I also have mental health problems but they are well under control. Been off meds now for about 9 months and still feel great. I care for my daughter who is dealing with some difficult issues at the moment but seems to be coping at the moment. I'm really very proud of her. Doing her GCSE's next year then off to college. I think shes great.

 

[Fedup]

Carers.........

......... how are you all ?

I sometime's feel we get forgotton

I'm okish i guess , just plodding along .

 

[Megannie]

I guess you must feel like that sometimes fedup, my daughter got angry as she got older that no support was given to my family, my husband was expected to cope. I'm very lucky that he doesn't suffer with MH difficulties, I know the isolation sometimes has got him down.

I have had to care and support both of my sons when they developed depression, I stayed strong at the time but collapsed in a heap afterwards.

 

[Isobel]

You're amazing

You are all amazing. J & I both have major mental illness and actually met in hospital. Since then he has developed heart failure, diabetes and gout and his son - now 15 - was diagnosed as high functioning autistic nearly 2 years ago. He lives with his Mum but we are of course deeply involved with him. We've both had spells in hospital during the last few years, J because of his heart as well.
It sometimes (often?) feels as if we have to carry on because there seems to be no other choice and because we're made the way we are we manage somehow, leaving out as much as we can, and then as someone else put it, collapse in a heap. The hard bit to me is the carrying on when feeling hopeless, that nothing will ever change, certainly not for the better. It's very hard to see the light.
How do others cope?
Love,
Isobel

 

[midnight]

you guys are diamonds

you should all be proud of yourselves

 

[messedupmiss]

Accessing services

Hi there

Just wanted to vent, lol find it very frustrating as both me and my partner fall under the same mental health team, this has meant breaches of confidentiality in the past etc also it is fine when one of us is ill and the other is ok but when we are ill at the same time, I have had to go into a different ward for a different catchement, also any service I can access so can they so sometimes it feels like there is little chance of much time out. Sorry if that sounds harsh but I think its good for both of us to have time out from each other, usually this is done by her being asleep upstairs all day and me being asleep or watching tv downstairs.

Anyone come across this before and have any advice or information about how we can help us help ourselves.

 

[Silverski]

Hi Messedupmiss

Some years ago my daughter was admitted to a psychiatric hospital. She was fifteen at the time. I then had a breakdown and was admitted to the same hospital. This didn't work out. I got very distressed every time I saw her and was moved to a different hospital. We have both had hospital admissions over the years since but never at the same time. She now has MS as well as her major mental illness and lives in a nursing home. We have had very difficult times over the years including a period of four years when she blamed her family for 'having had her locked up' and didn't want to know us. We got through that time and now, many years later, I have a very good relationship with her.

It must be very difficult when both people in a relationship have problems, but on the other hand, maybe it helps you to understand what each of you is going through. I wish you both well.