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Does anyone believe this is appropriate from my therapist?

T

TheMrPink

New member
Joined
Sep 23, 2015
Messages
1
Hello!

I have been seeing the same LMSW for over three years now.

A few months ago, his schedule changed and he insisted I get into a specified time slot and commit to it or run the risk of him not having any availability.
I have had a regular time with him before (he decided to no longer work that day) but when he presented me with scheduling options this time he presented it as an urgent need that I /must/ commit to a day and time.

Last week, I missed my appointment. I received a call from him 10 minutes into it asking if I was planning to show up.
I was going through a rough patch last week and forgot to follow up with him about the appointment.

Apparently, he took this to mean I wasn't interested in seeing him any more, and I just found out he have my day and time to another patient, breaking our agreement for the standing appointment, without so much as a phone call or text telling me he was doing so.
Nothing. Not even a call to see if I was alright as I've known him to do with other patients (from group).

I'm quite annoyed by this, this is the first time I have not contacted him back and it feels like he's trying to "teach me a lesson."

Should I have expected this reaction on his part?!
 
Kerome

Kerome

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 29, 2013
Messages
12,748
Location
Europe
No, it doesn't seem very polite or considerate. I would have thought he might have given you some cooling off time and contacted you again in a few days.
 
H

Helena1

Well-known member
Forum Safety Team
Joined
Oct 11, 2014
Messages
10,047
Location
UK
I don't think that is good, if you had only seen him like twice then perhaps but as you have been seeing him a long time you think he would know you a bit better and that you just forgot.
 
SoggySlippers

SoggySlippers

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 25, 2015
Messages
126
He did insist that you commit to a day and time,right?You also said he presented it as urgent,so it sounds like he made it clear to you ahead of time.So,I see nothing wrong with someone else getting your time slot.

Maybe you could schedule a session and let him know how it made you feel?
 
H

Harper

Guest
Hi,

Does this mean you will no longer be able to meet with him? Did you miss lots of appointments without letting him know? It seems to me that he was urging you to make a serious commitment to therapy and because he has reduced his hours, he is having to be a little ruthless. It must have felt a little unfair though that he took you by surprise by the possible change. 3 years is a long time for it to end so suddenly.

Just a question, was the appointment you missed the new re-scheduled one?

If it was then it may have been hard for him to believe you forgot. I hope you get the chance to talk things over with him.
 
Poopy Doll

Poopy Doll

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2015
Messages
11,502
Location
Fort Lauderdale, Florida, USA
It sounds like you were not the type that missed appointments all the time. If that's the case, then there should have been more communication from the therapist. It is so annoying to be suddenly dumped by your therapist. We expect a smooth transition from these people and instead it's a sudden disconnect. It's so rude. Especially after three years. No goodbyes, nothing.
 
A

anklebiter

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 7, 2011
Messages
288
Location
Aberdeenshire
Seems a cruel thing to do but I hear many stories nowadays about therapists abandoning their clients without any reasonable explanation. Some of them also seem immature like they haven't done enoughwork on themself. I avoid them like the plague now but I'm much better at trusting my own judgement.
 
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