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Do you think i have Borderline Personality Disorder?

T

Tom2020

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
New Jersey
Hello, I am just trying to figure out what is wrong with me. With the pandemic, I do not trust talking to doctors. So I came here. I feel I have bi polar or bpd. I have a doctor in the family and seems to think so. The only mental problem I know I have is OCD (doctor i saw told me last year), not sure what else. Stopped going after virus. I came here so you can help me. Thank you for reading and helping me. Do you believe I have bpd?

Here is what I experience:

- My moods shift: I go from sad to happy to angry. It depends. But my moods are like a light switch.

- I even go into a mood where I feel 'extreme boredom', no idea what to do with my life, and leads to irritation.

*lately I have been controling my moods though.

- I sometimes (been a while since I felt this) go into a quick rage. I do not hurt anyone. I never hurt myself (not suicidal). I just hit objects. I destroy my own property. I once stabbed my own table after getting into a fight. I do not want to hurt myself, anyone else, just objects. The rage comes and goes. It is fast. After hitting objects it goes away. Go back to normal.

- I do not trust people: I have a very small group of friends. And do not trust strangers. I feel they are against me. And do not trust their intentions. Even the nicest people. I once even accused my step-father of hating me after being rude to me. He did not mean any harm. I see that now. It takes a while for me to trust anyone. If I feel you are against me, I will think about it over and over (probably my OCD?) And think why do you hate me. My mind can take a situation and turn it into another. People can mean no harm and I take i another way

- I am paranoid about situations all the time.

- I go into moments where I feel like everything is over and life is over and a loser. Ex: I am turning 29 next year. I accomplished nothing in my life (job-wise) and feel I do not have much time left till old age (my 30s). I feel like a fucking loser with no money.

- I have severe insomnia (do not know if that has anything to do. Just trying to name everything).

- I hate being told what to do: Problems with authority. Annoyed and angry when people order me around. I do something it is because I want to do it.

Been feeling down for months. Probably the lockdown and now everything else. But I feel down. Depressed. Feel like I took downers.
 
T

Tom2020

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 23, 2020
Messages
61
Location
New Jersey
Forgot to add:

I have anxiety, also. Getting worse
 
SomeSwedishGirl

SomeSwedishGirl

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 16, 2020
Messages
3,493
Location
Sweden
You might. It does sound like you are struggling pretty bad with your feelings, and I think that maybe if you saw a mental healthcare professional and described all this, they might give you their diagnosis and give you helpful tips on how to cope with life as it is.
Easier said than done, I know. But knowing is always better than speculating.
 
B

Butterfly3

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2020
Messages
92
Location
England
Unfortunately we can’t diagnose you but it does sound like you have BPD. I would say please go to or call your doctor, talk to them about your symptoms and they can diagnose you and get you the right treatment and maybe even medication to help you. I know it sucks right now and things are hard but I promise you will get better and life will get good again. Please reach out here if you need anything or are ever in crisis, we’re here for you. Stay strong, you’ve got this :hug:
 
Himbo

Himbo

Member
Joined
Oct 19, 2020
Messages
12
Location
United States
What about the pandemic makes you not trust doctors? Is it because of the fear of contagion to go see them in person?

If so you can just do call in appointments with GPs, therapists, psychiatrist, and I'm sure any other specialist that does not need to physically examine you.
 
M

MYTIMEHASCOME

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 12, 2011
Messages
916
Hello, I am just trying to figure out what is wrong with me. With the pandemic, I do not trust talking to doctors. So I came here. I feel I have bi polar or bpd. I have a doctor in the family and seems to think so. The only mental problem I know I have is OCD (doctor i saw told me last year), not sure what else. Stopped going after virus. I came here so you can help me. Thank you for reading and helping me. Do you believe I have bpd?

Here is what I experience:

- My moods shift: I go from sad to happy to angry. It depends. But my moods are like a light switch.

- I even go into a mood where I feel 'extreme boredom', no idea what to do with my life, and leads to irritation.

*lately I have been controling my moods though.

- I sometimes (been a while since I felt this) go into a quick rage. I do not hurt anyone. I never hurt myself (not suicidal). I just hit objects. I destroy my own property. I once stabbed my own table after getting into a fight. I do not want to hurt myself, anyone else, just objects. The rage comes and goes. It is fast. After hitting objects it goes away. Go back to normal.

- I do not trust people: I have a very small group of friends. And do not trust strangers. I feel they are against me. And do not trust their intentions. Even the nicest people. I once even accused my step-father of hating me after being rude to me. He did not mean any harm. I see that now. It takes a while for me to trust anyone. If I feel you are against me, I will think about it over and over (probably my OCD?) And think why do you hate me. My mind can take a situation and turn it into another. People can mean no harm and I take i another way

- I am paranoid about situations all the time.

- I go into moments where I feel like everything is over and life is over and a loser. Ex: I am turning 29 next year. I accomplished nothing in my life (job-wise) and feel I do not have much time left till old age (my 30s). I feel like a fucking loser with no money.

- I have severe insomnia (do not know if that has anything to do. Just trying to name everything).

- I hate being told what to do: Problems with authority. Annoyed and angry when people order me around. I do something it is because I want to do it.

Been feeling down for months. Probably the lockdown and now everything else. But I feel down. Depressed. Feel like I took downers.
hey friend! You sound like me!! Like literally scarily like me :eek: when I went to mental health team they tried to put me on therapy and she went and talked to a forensic mental health nurse about me but I couldn’t go on the course coz all the people were from secure settings :( they think I’m a bad person... That’s what forensic nurses look after criminals even though in my life I try to be everyone’s friend :( do you split between extremes? Or have like all or nothing thinking I dunno it I have bpd but the mh team seem to think it but she said I over control personality so whereas most people with bpd will do thing s that show it and make it easy to diagnose I feel like I’m on fire but I keep it in coz I don’t want everyone to hate me - I really wanna day something but I won’t coz everyone on here will think bad of me, but yeah sorry you could have bpd because I feel a lot of those things - I love animals though I need a cat or something to love me unconditionally
 
G

Girl interupted

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 17, 2018
Messages
2,291
You need to be careful about self diagnosis, as tempting as it may be. Your symptoms could just be the natural result of having to be locked up for such a long time due to the pandemic. And that may dissipate once the quarantine is lifted. Talk with your doctor.
 
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