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Do you crave for loving relationship ?

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ManDss

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 24, 2020
Messages
281
Location
Argentina
I do. Ive been cravig for this since long time
I never had a love relationship, Im 28 old. Always wanted a steady partner, never liked the idea of 1 night stands, or things like that. Dont have a relationship really drains me, be alone, just alone, dont feel joy being alone.
 
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LouMar

Member
Joined
Oct 17, 2020
Messages
5
Location
Uk
Yes I do massively. Im 44 and after a 7 year relationship broke my heart and ended at the age of 26 Ive mainly been single. I never for one moment expected to get to 44 and still be single with no kids. Sometimes I crave that connection and loving contact. I can feel incredibly lonely. I dont know how something thats so natural to others hasnt come along as easily to me.
 
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sallimae76

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 18, 2019
Messages
647
Location
USA
Yes, I wish I was married to a good man with a good heart. I have never had a boyfriend and I am 44 years old. I want a sweet, kind relationship like Bindi Irwin and her husband Chandler.
 
Ozymandias

Ozymandias

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 12, 2019
Messages
292
Location
West London
I do... increasingly less so in recent years as it becomes harder to believe that it's possible for me to find someone, but the longing lingers. It's come back a bit in recent months, I think because of my mother's passing and the fact that's left me with no remaining close family... despite being fortunate enough to have friends, I nevertheless feel very isolated in the world. I guess that's because everyone who loved me is now gone.

I'm really not prepared to try and date though... I just think it's horrible; it reduces you to a material checklist. That's not how I want to evaluate people, nor how I want them to evaluate me. My only long term relationship grew out of a close friendship... I think that's the only way I'll ever enter into another one.

Yes I do massively. Im 44 and after a 7 year relationship broke my heart and ended at the age of 26 Ive mainly been single. I never for one moment expected to get to 44 and still be single with no kids. Sometimes I crave that connection and loving contact. I can feel incredibly lonely. I dont know how something thats so natural to others hasnt come along as easily to me.
I feel a lot of parallels with your situation... I'm 42 now, broke up with my ex of five years when I was 27, and haven't been with anyone else since. Honestly though I'm not completely surprised to still be single now as I always struggled with this aspect of life, and having no children doesn't bother me because I never wanted kids.

Your final sentence perfectly encapsulated how I feel... I would never try to claim that I'm some incredible catch, and I have my issues (hence why I'm on this forum), but I was a good partner to my ex - we remain friends to this day - and I'm an affectionate person. Also, while I'm not physically tall or handsome, I'm still in decent shape and reasonably fit. Far worse men than myself seem to have no problem going from one relationship to another despite being pieces of shit, like the partner of a friend of mine who's had five kids with as many different women despite being a cokehead football hooligan who tried to set fire to a houseboat knowing two people were on it. When I once had the pleasure of speaking to him he openly admitted to me about being banned from Leeds United's ground, and every pub in Leeds and York... I've wondered whether he was trying to intimidate me, but he sounded more proud than threatening. To be fair, I think it's the closest he's come to achieving something of note.

As the years have passed numerous other friends of mine have had relationships end, struggled for a little while, but then found someone else within several months with few outside signs of any great drama. One now former friend texted a happy birthday message to an acquaintance - a former uni housemate of her ex - that turned into a long conversation... they arranged to meet up in person, and got together pretty much straightaway. How does it just fall into some people's laps like that? That being said, this woman is blonde, blue-eyed, pretty, willowy, still in her twenties... I've got the blue eyes, but that's it.

I hope that things change for you.
 
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LouMar

Member
Joined
Oct 17, 2020
Messages
5
Location
Uk
Isn't it weird how some people just stumble from one relationship to another, I get too involved, if I say those 3 little words 'I love you' then I mean it and cant switch it off easily. I never wanted multiple relationships and really thought Id find somebody and get married. My friends keep pushing for me to go online but it scares me silly! I really cant deal with the rejection and it all feels too flippant for me. How can u truly know if you like somebody unless you meet and feel that chemistry. Sometimes I wish I lived in my parents era when they seemed more respect and willingness to stick around and work things out. These days its too easy to discard and move on. Oh well...thats my rant for the day 🤣🤣
 
LORD BURT

LORD BURT

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2013
Messages
34,890
Location
Mordor
As a Jedi, we are not allowed relationships. I need to maintain my focus on the here and now, and the future but not at expense of the present. There is no try.
 
wollie

wollie

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 29, 2019
Messages
3,599
Location
warwick
After being married once and living with three women I just don't trust them any more, sure I would like a partner but I can't find one right for me.
 
Z

Zaz2020

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 16, 2020
Messages
360
Location
Scotland
I've enough problems trying to develop a loving relationship with myself 🙂
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
1,498
Thing is if you want to connect, you need to reach out...
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 27, 2020
Messages
4,614
Location
Nashua NH
I miss mostly the intimate and physical aspects of being in a relationship. Someone to hold and be held by, someone to help make the world seem less harsh and senseless.
Regular sexual intercourse with someone you know intimately and are fond of is a big quality of life thing for me too. Relationships aren’t easy for me because I am too sensitive and trusting in them. It screws me up when they don’t work out too much. As a result I never seek them and seldom have the chance to open myself up to them. I have had good relationships in the past, though, and I do miss being in one. I’d be up for trying again should I meet a special someone but I’m not going out of my way to look for it or work on making it happen. xo, j
 
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Purpleplum

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 7, 2020
Messages
1,194
Location
nowhere
I don't care about it romantically anymore but the thought pops up sometimes that since my mom is gone now I'll never again get a kiss or told by someone that they love me.
 
Ozymandias

Ozymandias

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 12, 2019
Messages
292
Location
West London
Isn't it weird how some people just stumble from one relationship to another
I'm ashamed to say I don't have to think about such people for too long before envy starts to inevitably creep in, even when it involves friends, and that's an awful, poisonous emotion. It's sufficiently bad that having anyone reasonably close to me start playing the dating game can really destabilise my psyche. My self-esteem falls to pieces when I have a such a grandstand view of just how easy it is for some people to get dates... I start thinking about how difficult it is for me, and how hideous that must mean I am, and I'm prone to taking the resulting negativity and focusing it in some way on the person who I see as having stirred it up (even though I know it wasn't intentional). It's pretty much the worst of who I can be... fortunately, in recent years I've found friends who are either in stable long-term relationships, or who are in a similar situation to myself - either way, no-one who's actually dating.

I never wanted multiple relationships and really thought Id find somebody and get married.
Same here... when I was much younger I always hoped there'd only ever be one person, and that's who I'd spend the rest of my life with. Given my cynicism today, it's really weird to think that I was ever so naively hopeful.

Something which is still theoretically possible is that I'll only ever sleep with one person, but a major aspect of what I hoped for there - that the other person would be similarly inexperienced when we got together and so we'd learn simultaneously, from each other - seems extremely unlikely at my age. I feel sad about that... I don't want there to be this huge gulf in sexual experience.

My friends keep pushing for me to go online but it scares me silly! I really cant deal with the rejection and it all feels too flippant for me.
My friends have all tried to point me in that direction, but stopped after they realised how vehemently I'm against it, and how detailed my objections are. The internet has reduced dating to just another form of online shopping... I think it's very dehumanising, encouraging the same sort of attitude that people take to buying a piece of furniture, or a new laptop.

Sometimes I wish I lived in my parents era when they seemed more respect and willingness to stick around and work things out. These days its too easy to discard and move on.
I agree with what you say about it being too easy to discard and move on, but for me that problem is occurring at a much earlier stage... I think people are too quick to rule others out in the first place. It's all very instant gratification, wanting to be blown away on the first date... and I think the Tinder methodology encourages such behaviour way too much. Tinder is so utterly shallow that it genuinely offends me. Yeah, looks matter, but is it really necessary to so absolutely revel in that?
 
DanL15000

DanL15000

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 5, 2018
Messages
770
Location
United States
I do. But what do I do in six months when I wish I didn't?

I'm just not tuned properly for an in person 24/7 relationship. I never will be.

The loneliness I can handle. Causing harm to someone for my own selfish reasons...I just don't want to live with that.

Now, if I could find a sometimes companion online or even local (that was independent and wanted to remain that way) I think I could be good for some laughs.
 
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